lisap1971 Posted October 6, 2012 Posted October 6, 2012 Im a 40 year old woman, recently divorced (april), and I have two children. I have had 2 extremely long crappy relationships in the past 22 years and this whole "dating" thing is really new to me. Ive been dating a man that I met on Plenty of Fish for just over 2 months, we text/talk daily, we see each other once or twice a week. I have never had a man treat me the way he does, make me smile the way he does, wine & dine me the way he does, and even kiss me the way he does. We have a great time together and we really enjoy spending time with each other. He has met my sister & her bf, my cousin, and some of my close friends, but I have yet to meet any of his........I know there is definitely a connection here, but we haven't really had "the talk" about where we are in the relationship. I have since canceled my POF acct (not because of him, for other personal reasons) and sadly **hanging my head in shame** I do search on POF to see if he is online and YES he is online DAILY! After 2 months I want to know where we stand, as a couple, if we are a couple, or what is going on. I did start to mention my feelings for him, and I do feel a lot for him, I think im actually falling in love with him, he didnt say much back to me, but he did smile and caressed my face and then passionately kissed me.........I guess I just need to know if im wasting my time or if there is a potential for something to be of us. Im scared to ask because im not sure if its "too soon" and im more terrified that he will get freaked out and not see me anymore. Any thoughts?? Id love to hear from Men as well as this may help me understand the mind of a man a little more clearly.......lol Thanks for your time!!
HeldbyGravity Posted October 6, 2012 Posted October 6, 2012 Unfortunately this may just be a conversation you need to have with him. He seems to have fun with you and seems to be attracted to you, but do you know what kind of relationship he was looking for in the first place? Is he Looking for commitment, or just a good time? It has only been two months of dating, so this is about the time when (taking it slowly) someone would ask where the relationship should go. Give or take a month. If the physical element progresses while the emotional element doesn't, and there's no commitment, I don't think he knows if he wants to officially be committed to one gal. That's just how some people are. I also think that due to how you have been treated in the past, is there a chance that you have fallen so hard for him because he is the first good guy to come along? I would take it slow with the confessions and sort of let him come to you.
Minka333 Posted October 6, 2012 Posted October 6, 2012 I agree with the poster above. Your self-esteem may still be in limbo from all your past disappointments..and you are very gullible to any guy who shows affection/attention. Never fully trust or believe what this man says. He is still basically a stranger. Don't let your emotions cloud your judgment.* You have to learn to protect your heart as early as now to prevent you from possible heartache. There are so many vultures out there who can smell women who are vulnerable and naive. Him being online is a red flag... Whatever his reason may be...be wary. He has to earn/gain your trust through actions and in time. You can discuss with him certain things that bother you. That way you will know if you are wasting your time or not. So i suggest to keep an open mind. Be careful and proceed with caution. Wish you luck!
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