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Coping Methods


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Posted

There are so many broken hearts here...including mine. I'm trying so hard to move on and not let this breakup destroy my trust in men and my hope for love again...

 

I read a quote today and I just wanted to share part of it, in the hopes that maybe someone in pain will read it and it will help them, because it helped me. The site is called The Daily Motivator, and every morning there is a very positive message there. I force myself to read positive things because it's too easy to fall into negative despair at the moment.

 

"Allow time to pass and as it does, make good use of it.

 

Accept and be thankful for what has been, and for what is now. Fully and lovingly utilize the opportunity of this day you now have.

 

When the wind is at your back, use the occasion to make rapid progress. When the wind is in your face, take the opportunity to grow stronger.

 

Learn from those who share your opinions. And learn even more from those who disagree with you."

Posted

Nice quote RR, I like it :)

 

One man's mistakes does not represent us all so don't lose your trust.

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Posted
Nice quote RR, I like it :)

 

One man's mistakes does not represent us all so don't lose your trust.

 

Thank you :-)....I should have said my trust in humanity...but that's overly dramatic when I read it. ;-)

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Posted

I woke up feeling good, starting to think that the ex is just a distant memory. Then something came up, I saw something in the news that reminded me of him and my first instinct was to remember what could have been; I started to feel sad again. But after reading this message, I made the decision not to think of him or the plans we made together. I choose to move forward and spend my day doing things for me and to continue to let his memory fade into oblivion.

 

"You have the power to choose your attitude, your perspective, your direction, your responses, your expectations, your actions and so much more.

 

It’s a waste of your time and energy to blame and complain when you can be doing something much more positive and powerful.

 

Make your choice, and then make all the other choices along the way that will bring it about.

 

Take a positive, active role in your life. Make peace with what is, with what you have, and then make your choice of what to do with it all."

 

Making peace with "what is", is the difficult part. I think that time, will and distraction are the only surefire method to accomplish this. But in first choosing not to let him invade my thoughts, that's the first step to getting through today.

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Posted

I'm going to keep posting these quotes I've been reading, they're helping me to cope with this breakup, I hope they help someone else too.

 

"You have endured every challenge that has come your way. Now you are in a position to move forward in whatever direction you choose.

 

You are a survivor, and yet life is about so much more than mere survival. You are a dreamer, and now is the time to live your dreams.

 

Give yourself credit for the success you’ve already created and for the value you continue to create. Then give yourself a meaningful goal that is worthy of the successful person you are."

 

I read a poem today where the author writes about the tears she shed led to freedom. I think now that I've endured the challenge of a breakup, and the aftermath, I need to be more active in reaching my goals and dreams. It's one thing to dream about life with a loving partner, but it's another to dream of my own goals and accomplishments. I think that I will focus completely on myself from now on, work towards my education, my health and wellness, my creativity and the road trip I want to take next summer.

 

Sure, the sadness will creep in and I will cry, but overall, it's time for me now. I want to feel that freedom again.

Posted

Hi RiverRain. The quotes that you are posting are very positive.I will continue to visit just to read them.I am sorry for your loss.I feel your pain.Trust in time and positive thinking I am told that is the key!I am a little over a month into dealing with heartbreak.Where are you from in Canda?

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Posted
Hi RiverRain. The quotes that you are posting are very positive.I will continue to visit just to read them.I am sorry for your loss.I feel your pain.Trust in time and positive thinking I am told that is the key!I am a little over a month into dealing with heartbreak.Where are you from in Canada?

 

I'm glad you like the quotes. I don't think it's ever a waste of time to share a good positive message! Some days we need a little extra help. So you've been a month+ now...gosh I've just managed a week. Although to be honest, a month ago, I had a feeling it was all over anyway. I was in denial!

 

Right now I live north of Montreal, but I'm moving in the spring, not sure yet where, but to a bigger city to go back to university full-time. Where are you from?

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Posted

Interesting developments. It's been 9 days nc and officially over; although 30 days ago I suspected there was no hope...and I'm feeling good :)

 

I have coped much better than I thought I would. I was alone 18 years before I met the ex. I admit to clinging to the what could have been for those first 3 weeks before it was officially over. It had been so long since I had a romance that I guess I was willing to settle. Hindsight is so rewarding today because I'm glad that we are not together. Plus I'm meeting new people, messaging some guys too...it's nice! :)

 

I don't think I need to post in this thread anymore, well, hopefully, since I'm past the coping stage. I hope all those with broken hearts can get to where I am too, the freedom is comforting.

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