what do i do if my girlfriends not in love with me anymore?

[heartbroken11]

ive been dating my girlfriend for almost 2 years now.. a month after we met, i moved in with her parents. a year and half later, we move into my parents, then after a month, we decide to get our own place. we've been living together for only a month now.

 

when we first moved in together, i noticed that ive been having a lot of anxiety attacks and ive been taking it out on her. and a week ago (just jokingly) i said "i know ive been crazy lately and if you dont wanna be with me anymore i understand" and she said "im not in love with you anymore".. i wasnt being serious at all but i guess she was hoping that she wouldnt have to be the one to bring it up. so we talked about everything and broke up a few days ago..but then got back together cuz she said she wanted to try to see if we can still be together. but then we broke up again yesterday and got back together because everyone kept telling us to just give it one last try.

 

i dont know what to do because shes not making any effort to be with me. ive been showing her a lot of affection and telling her i was gonna take her out and make her feel special but i feel like its just not gonna work anymore.

 

i love her more than anything and this makes me really depressed and heartbroken. i need some advice..should i just let her go and see if she comes back? or should i stay in this relationship and keep trying to make things better?

[danny1972]

dude relationships need some kind of foundation moving in after 4 weeks is asking for trouble , the problem is you didn't know one another , she probably felt suffocated never had any time to assess the situation i.e take a step back , coupled with the fact you suffer from anxiety problems prob seems to much to take on board to soon , ok granted after a year you know each other a little better , but in hind sight would you have moved in so soon without a little "getting to know each other first " living together is a big step in any relationship , give your self some time , and more importantly if it's meant to be communicate .

[todreaminblue]

ive been dating my girlfriend for almost 2 years now.. a month after we met, i moved in with her parents. a year and half later, we move into my parents, then after a month, we decide to get our own place. we've been living together for only a month now.

 

when we first moved in together, i noticed that ive been having a lot of anxiety attacks and ive been taking it out on her. and a week ago (just jokingly) i said "i know ive been crazy lately and if you dont wanna be with me anymore i understand" and she said "im not in love with you anymore".. i wasnt being serious at all but i guess she was hoping that she wouldnt have to be the one to bring it up. so we talked about everything and broke up a few days ago..but then got back together cuz she said she wanted to try to see if we can still be together. but then we broke up again yesterday and got back together because everyone kept telling us to just give it one last try.

 

i dont know what to do because shes not making any effort to be with me. ive been showing her a lot of affection and telling her i was gonna take her out and make her feel special but i feel like its just not gonna work anymore.

 

i love her more than anything and this makes me really depressed and heartbroken. i need some advice..should i just let her go and see if she comes back? or should i stay in this relationship and keep trying to make things better?

 

 

i agree with danny 1972 it is quick to move in with someone four weeks after knowing them...the break up make up thing is a slippery slope to be sliding down.....every time you do it gets harder to climb back to where you were or make any real progress in the relationship....i would suggest some couples counseling and an effort on both parts to accept each other for who you both are....everyone has flaws you have to learn to adjust to stay in a relationship.....adapt adjust....every relationship is different and needs to be treated accordingly ....try a fresh start.....say this is it...we are doing this ....go for broke....no regret...then do what you can ....if it doesnt work out you will leave that relationship knowing you did everything you could and that will comfort you ....and help you in the next relationship...its a learning curve....sometimes its more bent for others.....make those curves work for you........deb

[heartbroken11]

I dont think counseling will work. shes the kind of person that doesnt want anyone to tell her how to run things. im just going to see how these next few days go, and if its not going well, i might have to call it off myself just for our own good. itll hurt, but its probably the right thing to do.

[danny1972]

absolutley the right thing to do , stay strong

[todreaminblue]

I dont think counseling will work. shes the kind of person that doesnt want anyone to tell her how to run things. im just going to see how these next few days go, and if its not going well, i might have to call it off myself just for our own good. itll hurt, but its probably the right thing to do.

 

 

I fsomeone refuses counseling to save a relationship they are nto invested in keeping it together...if you love someone truly love them you try what you can however difficult it is.......because living without that person, you cant see it till it actually happens......that is invested.....you dont wait for the crash and the value to go down in the market....you value the market and you set the price of it high you expect the same for your other investor....your partner....counseling is taking up shares in that investment......oh dear another analogy...if she isnt willing to do counseling then she is not investing properly..rogue trader alert alert.......take that under advisement....get your stock and get the crap outta there...im kidding nah not really....invest elsewhere is my advice....deb