ReadMyThread Posted October 3, 2012 Posted October 3, 2012 So I have been in no contact with my ex who left me for another guy for about 30 something days. I don't keep count anymore. It has been about a month and a week since she has broke up with me. I have been getting better but I still think about her everyday and miss her alot. Anyway, It has been like 3 weeks since I last checked her facebook. (Yeah I still have her as a friend.) I told myself I wouldn't check it anymore because I knew it would just hurt me more but to be honest, I just checked it for the first time in 3 weeks and IT MADE ME FEEL BETTER! NOT MORE HURT! Weird right? Well, turns out that she has not made the relationship officially on Facebook so I don't know what's going on with her and the guy she left me for. I don't care honestly. I already assume they are together and are happy so I don't care. But I seen the last post she posted on September 29th and it said, "New phone, Need numbers. Please." lmao. Wow. At first I seen it and my stomach turned and I thought, ouch she got a new phone that means she never wants anything to do with me ever again but then I re-read it and looked at it in a different way. She said, "New phone, Need numbers. Please.". lol. PLEASE. Look how desperate and stupid she looks for pleading for new numbers for her new phone lol. She obvisouly needs people to talk to. Pathetic. I also looked at it as YES she got a new phone and now she doesn't have my number so I will never hear from this B***** again. THANK YOU! Never thought checking her Facebook would make ME feel better but it did. lol. Might check it in another 3 weeks. Probably not. F her.
flitzanu Posted October 3, 2012 Posted October 3, 2012 So I have been in no contact with my ex who left me for another guy for about 30 something days. I don't keep count anymore. It has been about a month and a week since she has broke up with me. I have been getting better but I still think about her everyday and miss her alot. Anyway, It has been like 3 weeks since I last checked her facebook. (Yeah I still have her as a friend.) I told myself I wouldn't check it anymore because I knew it would just hurt me more but to be honest, I just checked it for the first time in 3 weeks and IT MADE ME FEEL BETTER! NOT MORE HURT! Weird right? Well, turns out that she has not made the relationship officially on Facebook so I don't know what's going on with her and the guy she left me for. I don't care honestly. I already assume they are together and are happy so I don't care. But I seen the last post she posted on September 29th and it said, "New phone, Need numbers. Please." lmao. Wow. At first I seen it and my stomach turned and I thought, ouch she got a new phone that means she never wants anything to do with me ever again but then I re-read it and looked at it in a different way. She said, "New phone, Need numbers. Please.". lol. PLEASE. Look how desperate and stupid she looks for pleading for new numbers for her new phone lol. She obvisouly needs people to talk to. Pathetic. I also looked at it as YES she got a new phone and now she doesn't have my number so I will never hear from this B***** again. THANK YOU! Never thought checking her Facebook would make ME feel better but it did. lol. Might check it in another 3 weeks. Probably not. F her. 30 days, 1 month and a week, but who's counting right? you need to block her and quit checking up on her.
mgce Posted October 3, 2012 Posted October 3, 2012 You do care. Unfriend. Block. Make it physically impossible for you to check again. You feel *better* because you interpreted something she said in a way that doesn't flatter her. Great: but your emotional reaction was still 100% dependent on what she said. Next time, when she says something that you can't interpret that way, you're going to feel miserable. And, as time goes on, that's guaranteed to happen. Don't let her maintain that power over you. I ignored this advice for months and learned the hard way that there is *no* way you can possibly come out better in the end by seeing what she's up to on FB. You were lucky this time but your luck *will* run out. Don't set yourself up for a ticking time bomb. Cut her out and don't look back. Block block block block block.
Author ReadMyThread Posted October 3, 2012 Author Posted October 3, 2012 There is your answer Damn straight lol.
Author ReadMyThread Posted October 3, 2012 Author Posted October 3, 2012 30 days, 1 month and a week, but who's counting right? you need to block her and quit checking up on her. lol nah man. I said "30 SOMETHING days." Not 30. It's like 38 or 39. I honestly don't remember. I could look at the calendar on my phone if I wanted to say the EXACT number but forget that. And I only know it has been 1 month and a week since the breakup because our anniversary was the 25th of every month. I feel it is too late to block her now lol. I blocked her as soon as she broke up with me but then she added me like a week later and I accepted it like a stupid a** lol. We have been in no contact since and I feel deleting her would be making contact in some way. Don't you? If I'm suppose to be getting over her and acting like I don't know her anymore and not trying to think about her don't you think if I delete her it will show her I'm not over her and that I am still thinking of her. She would be like, "ahhh he deleted me, he still must be looking at my page and caring about me.". That's how I feel. I honestly don't even go on Facebook anymore and don't have that urge everyone else does to look at their page. I can easily tell myself not to and not do it, but last night I just felt like I needed closure you know? Because right now it is eating me up inside thinking if they are together or not. If I knew they were, that would be that and i wouldn't have to think about it anymore.
Author ReadMyThread Posted October 3, 2012 Author Posted October 3, 2012 I understand you lol. I did get lucky which is why I will not check her Facebook anymore because I know if it were something else it would have hurt me. I'm just going to stay off Facebook for the next 3 months. No posting anything and no de-friending anyone or blocking. It's just Facebook. Forget Facebook. I have a life to live.
Mcnulty Posted October 3, 2012 Posted October 3, 2012 You're totally over analyzing! Block her, then no comebacks or communication...end of...no analyzing!
Author ReadMyThread Posted October 3, 2012 Author Posted October 3, 2012 You're totally over analyzing! Block her, then no comebacks or communication...end of...no analyzing! I might be. I should just de-active it. Mine that is. I don't post anything anyways lol.
Sameold Posted October 3, 2012 Posted October 3, 2012 Block her mate. I had same scenario and just cus they arnt listed as in a relationship it doesn't mean are not in one. Blocking her is a strong move, Ull never ever get closure any other way, block her and do it now! 2
Simon Phoenix Posted October 3, 2012 Posted October 3, 2012 Blocking her news feed does the same thing if you don't want to delete or block her from Facebook. Of course, that's only an option if you have the self-control not to check her page. If you don't, just drop her if it's causing you pain and anguish.
Author ReadMyThread Posted October 4, 2012 Author Posted October 4, 2012 Blocking her news feed does the same thing if you don't want to delete or block her from Facebook. Of course, that's only an option if you have the self-control not to check her page. If you don't, just drop her if it's causing you pain and anguish. Yeah see! Finally someone who can agree with me lol. I've blocked her on my news feed and have the self control to not check her page. I tell myself not to and I haven't been. I just feel deleting her would start some drama which is never good.
Simon Phoenix Posted October 4, 2012 Posted October 4, 2012 Yeah see! Finally someone who can agree with me lol. I've blocked her on my news feed and have the self control to not check her page. I tell myself not to and I haven't been. I just feel deleting her would start some drama which is never good. Same. Right now deleting her would cause more drama than just blocking her news feed would. I'm open to blocking her if it becomes a problem, but right now it's not. I don't need to create additional problems when I'm finally have an even head about this whole thing and I don't need to make any sort of statement. I get why people do it and encourage it if it helps them, but it would not help me right now. 1
Sameold Posted October 4, 2012 Posted October 4, 2012 You need to do what is right for you. However the OP wants her back. You are letting your ex think you are ok with her. At some point she is going to have pictures up of her bf. I know you won't accept this but you think blocking her is hammering the final nail in the coffin when fact is its already shut. If anything keeping her as a friend will ease her guilt especially when you start posting your nights put, she will be glad your moving on. You'll look like the biyatches that accept being her friend as you can't sleep with her anymore. Anyway to keep some contact with her is not good. Blocking ensures NC both ways, it blocks her insight and forces her to live with any guilt she has plus it makes her aware you feel disgusted by her.
Author ReadMyThread Posted October 4, 2012 Author Posted October 4, 2012 Same. Right now deleting her would cause more drama than just blocking her news feed would. I'm open to blocking her if it becomes a problem, but right now it's not. I don't need to create additional problems when I'm finally have an even head about this whole thing and I don't need to make any sort of statement. I get why people do it and encourage it if it helps them, but it would not help me right now. Exactly. I'm with you fully. If I were to delete her it would just put all these thoughts in my head on how she would react to it and how she would see it which would for sure set me back for sure. Therefore, I just stay off Facebook and carry on with my life. It's just a website lol.
Author ReadMyThread Posted October 4, 2012 Author Posted October 4, 2012 You need to do what is right for you. However the OP wants her back. You are letting your ex think you are ok with her. At some point she is going to have pictures up of her bf. I know you won't accept this but you think blocking her is hammering the final nail in the coffin when fact is its already shut. If anything keeping her as a friend will ease her guilt especially when you start posting your nights put, she will be glad your moving on. You'll look like the biyatches that accept being her friend as you can't sleep with her anymore. Anyway to keep some contact with her is not good. Blocking ensures NC both ways, it blocks her insight and forces her to live with any guilt she has plus it makes her aware you feel disgusted by her. But I am okay with me ex. I'm at the point where I have to accept her decision. She didn't want to be with me and there isn't anything I can do about it. Her loss. That won't make me hate her. I hate her because she left me for another person but if that's what makes her happy then I need to accept it and be happy for her because I truly love her and want her to find whatever it is she is looking for. Besides, I know this new guy won't care for her the way I did. I know no guy will. Maybe she will see that, maybe not. And yes, soon she will be posting pictures with her new boyfriend but will I see them? No. Because I don't look at her page and won't. And I don't think her new boyfriend will like the fact the she still has the pictures of me and her on HER facebook still lol. I'll look like the Biyatch for adding her as I can't sleep with her anymore? Why would I want to sleep with someone who left me for another person? lol. Really? She'll be the one deleting me once she sees me posting pictures of the prettier, smarter, and more mature girl I will be with once I heal from this.
flitzanu Posted October 4, 2012 Posted October 4, 2012 every post since, you've been talking about it as a contest. taht's the reason we are telling you to block her. you're anticipating her reaction and "drama" by blocking her, which still means you're concerned with her and how she feels and affects you. 1
Author ReadMyThread Posted October 4, 2012 Author Posted October 4, 2012 every post since, you've been talking about it as a contest. taht's the reason we are telling you to block her. you're anticipating her reaction and "drama" by blocking her, which still means you're concerned with her and how she feels and affects you. I guess your right. I should just delete her. but won't that set me back?
flitzanu Posted October 4, 2012 Posted October 4, 2012 I guess your right. I should just delete her. but won't that set me back? how is that setting you back? you're not together! delete her from your life already, like she did you.
Mike_d Posted October 4, 2012 Posted October 4, 2012 Exactly. I'm with you fully. If I were to delete her it would just put all these thoughts in my head on how she would react to it and how she would see it which would for sure set me back for sure. Therefore, I just stay off Facebook and carry on with my life. It's just a website lol. jesus, who gives a damn about what she thinks. you are not with her anymore, she's moved on, most likely dating, and sleeping with other guys. that you worry about what she says or thinks shows a lack of acceptance of your current situation. You're leaving that one last emotional nugget so that *you* don't have to feel like the person that is already gone is actually gone. that is called negotiating with yourself so that you don't have to face your reality. If its "just a website" then what's the big deal about pushing the delete button on her? easy right? welcome to Stuck-ville, population you seriously, all the drama here over facebook and the gruesome codependent behav that comes with it, gag, enough already. move on 1
Sameold Posted October 4, 2012 Posted October 4, 2012 Do you really hope your ex is happy with someone else? I don't and I loved mine like the only girl in the world. She screwed me over as yours did you. Facebook is a window that should be shut now. You will look one day just to see if she still has your old pictures up in her profile, to see if she is listed as in a relationship etc. It is your decision of course what you do but why you would hang on to anything here is beyond me. Don't give her the satisfaction of staying friends in reality/on facebook or any other format. She has ran out your life and is probably getting drilled from behind tonight by her new bf (sorry but I'm trying to shock you). She wont care about your status updates or be creeping you...and if she is then so what anyway? Block her and leave her with the thoughts of your relationship, don't let her see who you are now because she chose to let it all go.
Simon Phoenix Posted October 4, 2012 Posted October 4, 2012 I have my ex on Facebook, I've blocked her news feed so I have no updates in her life, haven't clicked on her page in a week and a half or something (don't really remember when I last did) and couldn't care less what she's thinking when I post status updates or pictures. I guess I'm in the extreme minority.
KatZee Posted October 4, 2012 Posted October 4, 2012 So I have been in no contact with my ex who left me for another guy for about 30 something days. I don't keep count anymore. It has been about a month and a week since she has broke up with me. I have been getting better but I still think about her everyday and miss her alot. Anyway, It has been like 3 weeks since I last checked her facebook. (Yeah I still have her as a friend.) I told myself I wouldn't check it anymore because I knew it would just hurt me more but to be honest, I just checked it for the first time in 3 weeks and IT MADE ME FEEL BETTER! NOT MORE HURT! Weird right? Well, turns out that she has not made the relationship officially on Facebook so I don't know what's going on with her and the guy she left me for. I don't care honestly. I already assume they are together and are happy so I don't care. But I seen the last post she posted on September 29th and it said, "New phone, Need numbers. Please." lmao. Wow. At first I seen it and my stomach turned and I thought, ouch she got a new phone that means she never wants anything to do with me ever again but then I re-read it and looked at it in a different way. She said, "New phone, Need numbers. Please.". lol. PLEASE. Look how desperate and stupid she looks for pleading for new numbers for her new phone lol. She obvisouly needs people to talk to. Pathetic. I also looked at it as YES she got a new phone and now she doesn't have my number so I will never hear from this B***** again. THANK YOU! Never thought checking her Facebook would make ME feel better but it did. lol. Might check it in another 3 weeks. Probably not. F her. I quite frankly don't see the desperation here at all. She got a new phone. For whatever reason, contacts were lost on the old phone, or maybe she just never had them transferred over. For whatever reason, she's reaching out and saying, "Hey guys, please send over your numbers, I lost my contacts." I don't see it as pleading at all. I see this all the time on my feed. "Lost my phone. Crap! Please send your numbers!" or I see statuses just like what your ex posted. You clearly are still about this girl. You're trying to soothe your own bruised ego by turning that status into something it's not, then you say F her, and then you say you're going to look again in 3 weeks. Comon. Who you fooling here? Delete and move on. 1
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