warrenorabbits Posted October 2, 2012 Posted October 2, 2012 And "seal the deal"? I think I've got the confidence, most of the looks, etc. But two crucial points still remain. (1) Just how the hell do you talk to someone without making it extra-obvious what your intentions are? Or is the traditional "don't just start talking to strangers about random things or it'll be obvious you're hitting on them" rule relaxed since bars are well-known places for singles? (2) How to get the conversation naturally into you-know-what-I-mean territory without being vulgar or geekily self-conscious? SPECIAL BONUS QUESTION! (3) If you are boarding with people (i.e., you don't have your own place and the people who own the house are rather strict), is there a good way to ask to go to her place?
oaks Posted October 2, 2012 Posted October 2, 2012 Oh, Happy Birthday!! (1) Just how the hell do you talk to someone without making it extra-obvious what your intentions are? Or is the traditional "don't just start talking to strangers about random things or it'll be obvious you're hitting on them" rule relaxed since bars are well-known places for singles? For the most part it's obvious that you're talking to a stranger of the opposite sex because you find them attractive. Don't worry about that. Either just get on with the talking, or only approach when you've made eye contact or received a smile or whatever body language you were hoping to see. (2) How to get the conversation naturally into you-know-what-I-mean territory without being vulgar or geekily self-conscious? Hooking up with someone you just met at the bar territory? Well there's always the oaks-special of "grab her butt" (I'm sure I've mentioned it before) just to make it very clear what territory you were aiming for. Be ready to duck. SPECIAL BONUS QUESTION! (3) If you are boarding with people (i.e., you don't have your own place and the people who own the house are rather strict), is there a good way to ask to go to her place? "... so, can I walk you home?"
sydneysider1978 Posted October 2, 2012 Posted October 2, 2012 Hi there warren. I'm not sure how the bar/club scene is in your country but it sounds like you think of these places as kind of supermarket for picking up. Sure this does happen when it happens, but the majority of the time where I have lived ( uk and Australia) these places are for socialising and fun. I probably go to a bar between one and three times a week and take someone home, um, never. If you go out thinking that every interaction you have might end in sex that evening then you're going to come across as really creepy. Just enjoy yourself, chat to your friends, listen to the music, enjoy a drink or some food. Chat to everyone and anyone, guys, girls, hot, not so hot, just for the fun finding out about new people. Relax and if someone does seem cool, and you're having fun chatting and you talk about a band/restaurant/art exhibition get their number. 1
insertnamehere Posted October 3, 2012 Posted October 3, 2012 (1) Just how the hell do you talk to someone without making it extra-obvious what your intentions are? Or is the traditional "don't just start talking to strangers about random things or it'll be obvious you're hitting on them" rule relaxed since bars are well-known places for singles? It's a bar. The entire point is that all the single people are there for roughly the same purpose: to encounter the other single people.
yongyong Posted October 3, 2012 Posted October 3, 2012 You seem like you are excited to go to bars/clubs since you are old enough.... Well don't rely on it to get girls..... you will learn how girls will act differently in those places. the same girl you saw at the library who will be sweet when you approach her, will act differently when she throws make up and mini dress and go out with bunch of other girls. People will act pretentious including guys towards you. You and her knows exactly why you are talking to her. You want to be seen as 'hey I have no interest getting into your pants till I get to know you'? then hit on her at other places. You have to throw different mask and act differently in those scene unless you act like that during the day. You don't want to fake that? well..... anyways, it's a matter of time for you to realize those things. good luck
fishtaco Posted October 3, 2012 Posted October 3, 2012 If you think you're going to score, you're going for the wrong reason, and you will be disappointed. Most important, you should go to enjoy yourself. If you don't, and it feels like work, then bar/club scene is not for you. Go with a bunch of friends, and just have a good time. No expectations. If something is going to happen, it will. You can't make things happen, you can only jump on the opportunity when it presents itself. You can increase your chances by going with female friends. Women like men that other women like. So having your female friends there and hopefully hanging all over you, you will only get more attention. You can also increase your chances of ONS by hanging out till after last call. That's when the drunk horny chicks make a last ditch effort to hook up. If, that's your thing. That was never mine, but I don't judge, and it's perfectly fine for single people to do. Just remember to have a good time. Happy is attractive.
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