ReadMyThread Posted October 2, 2012 Posted October 2, 2012 I have been in no contact with my ex for 30 days now. She hasn't tried to reach out to me. She dumped me for another guy although when she did it she told me a week after, "You just go talk to another girl and I'm going to talk to Cody(the guy she dumped me for)". Now, I assume since she dumped me for him and hasn't tried to talk to me at all that they are already together but I REALLY don't know if they are or not. I feel like going on "cody's" facebook and seeing if they have the relationship on Facebook or not. I have my ex as a friend on Facebook but I don't look at her stuff and disable all of her stuff so I can't see it and hurt more but even when she broke up with me she has never changed her relationship status. Hers said she is still "in a relationship". I assume that they are together already but I feel I need closure! Like I know it would hurt seeing their relationship status on Facebook but then I WOULD KNOW FOR SURE and it could possibly help. It would be a reality check like, "Yo, they are together. Chill Out.". Should I go look or not? I feel I shouldn't, I don't want to hurt anymore than I am but I WANT to know if they are together or not.
ponette Posted October 2, 2012 Posted October 2, 2012 one thing that always amazes me is the way we, when dumped, fixate on the ex's new love, if there is one. this new person in your ex's life, if she actually has a new guy, is NOT the problem. they are just a symptom of the problem. since we have feelings for the ex, we don't want to blame them, so we focus our anger and blame on this other person. don't sweat this other guy; he's nothing to her, and what does it tell you about HER character if she can pick up with somebody else so quickly? don't look at that facebook crap, it's worthless self-torture and will accompish nothing. you guys aren't together, doesn't matter if she's talking to some other guy. she isn't going to treat him any better than you got. hang in there.
LostOne1 Posted October 2, 2012 Posted October 2, 2012 I have been in no contact with my ex for 30 days now. She hasn't tried to reach out to me. She dumped me for another guy although when she did it she told me a week after, "You just go talk to another girl and I'm going to talk to Cody(the guy she dumped me for)". Now, I assume since she dumped me for him and hasn't tried to talk to me at all that they are already together but I REALLY don't know if they are or not. I feel like going on "cody's" facebook and seeing if they have the relationship on Facebook or not. I have my ex as a friend on Facebook but I don't look at her stuff and disable all of her stuff so I can't see it and hurt more but even when she broke up with me she has never changed her relationship status. Hers said she is still "in a relationship". I assume that they are together already but I feel I need closure! Like I know it would hurt seeing their relationship status on Facebook but then I WOULD KNOW FOR SURE and it could possibly help. It would be a reality check like, "Yo, they are together. Chill Out.". Should I go look or not? I feel I shouldn't, I don't want to hurt anymore than I am but I WANT to know if they are together or not. tough to say... at 30 days I think you might be okay to know. I was past 30 days and I honestly don't care much if she is or isn't with anyone. It is nice for closure to know what happened, so you can just say "hey" I know.. this and this happened and shes not worth it and im done. It's tough to say, because it might hurt you a lot, but the anger might help you want to get over her and not want to take her back anymore. No one wants someone else's sloppy seconds. I guess someone can take my ex if they want to only lots of sloppy seconds left now after 3 yrs....
Author ReadMyThread Posted October 2, 2012 Author Posted October 2, 2012 Yeah you are right. I KNOW she doesn't love this guy which confuses me. She left the person she loves for the person she likes. The thing they tell you NEVER to do. I KNOW this guy won't treat her the way I did but there isn't anything I can do. Hmmm. Yeah, I won't look. Thank you! . Getting better each day.
curiouslyhuman Posted October 2, 2012 Posted October 2, 2012 I have been in no contact with my ex for 30 days now. She hasn't tried to reach out to me. She dumped me for another guy although when she did it she told me a week after, "You just go talk to another girl and I'm going to talk to Cody(the guy she dumped me for)". Now, I assume since she dumped me for him and hasn't tried to talk to me at all that they are already together but I REALLY don't know if they are or not. I feel like going on "cody's" facebook and seeing if they have the relationship on Facebook or not. I have my ex as a friend on Facebook but I don't look at her stuff and disable all of her stuff so I can't see it and hurt more but even when she broke up with me she has never changed her relationship status. Hers said she is still "in a relationship". I assume that they are together already but I feel I need closure! Like I know it would hurt seeing their relationship status on Facebook but then I WOULD KNOW FOR SURE and it could possibly help. It would be a reality check like, "Yo, they are together. Chill Out.". Should I go look or not? I feel I shouldn't, I don't want to hurt anymore than I am but I WANT to know if they are together or not. What difference does it make if she is with him or not? isnt the most important thing that she doesnt want to be with you? Go look if you want, and you can find out two things: either she is with him and doesnt want to be with you or she's not with him and doesnt want to be with you. Either way, there is no winning here with the knowledge you will acquire my friend, im sorry to say. good luck!
Author ReadMyThread Posted October 2, 2012 Author Posted October 2, 2012 Yeah LostOne1 I am at the point where I feel it may not hurt me as much as it would when I use to check her page and all that non sense lol but I don't know. I'm also at the point where my head is saying "I hate her. I want nothing to do with her. She left me for another guy and it would never be the same if she came back. She ruined me. If she texted me I would be pissed!!!" but my heart is saying the opposite. :/. Still love her.
Author ReadMyThread Posted October 2, 2012 Author Posted October 2, 2012 lmaoooo jeez CurioslyHuman! S*** on my feelings why don't you lmao. Yeah your right. I see it as that way. I'm not looking. She didn't want to be with me and left me. Nothing I can do. Just wish I knew what it was that made her leave me for him. :/.
curiouslyhuman Posted October 2, 2012 Posted October 2, 2012 (edited) lmaoooo jeez CurioslyHuman! S*** on my feelings why don't you lmao. Yeah your right. I see it as that way. I'm not looking. She didn't want to be with me and left me. Nothing I can do. Just wish I knew what it was that made her leave me for him. :/. Didnt mean to hurt your feelings! but it really is the way you should look at it. Its just that it wont serve any good purpose for you, ya know Edited October 2, 2012 by curiouslyhuman
Author ReadMyThread Posted October 2, 2012 Author Posted October 2, 2012 lol it's all good. That's what I'm on here for lol. The things I don't want to hear but NEED to hear. lol. It's over. I Have to accept it and realize that she wanted him and not me. I'm not going to look. Need to just let them be together because that is what she wanted and if that's what is making her happy then, I guess I can be happy she is happy. Still f****** hate her though lol. I hope he cheats on her like 3 times! lol. She has to see one day that nobody will care for her the way I did. I hope. Ugh. F***. I wish I could speed up time. To the point where I don't even care anymore :/.
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