Ex Already With Someone Else 2 Months Since BreakUp

[LoveHurts88]

There hasn't been a day where I haven't thought about my EX. Since the last time we talked about a month ago I asked her if she was seeing someone else she said no.. Bunch of BS.. Her sister told me shes never home so where else would she be? She doesn't sleep at home so I got the point. Her sis told me to pretty much just forget about her and that she's no good.

 

I'm just pissed that 2 years she leaves for someone else already so soon. Makes me hate her now. No respect whatsoever.. However, I'm thinking that she either has GIGS or that she needs someone else to keep me off her mind but I highly doubt that..

 

Jesus christ.. GIRLS BE CRAZY. LYING SACKS OF SHT.... How can I ever trust someone again? There hasn't been a single day where I haven't thought about her.

[witmadskilllz]

Bro, lol, my ex dumped me and 2 weeks after, was in a new relationship and are still at it till this day. **** happpens bro, it's life, what doesn't kill you, makes you stronger.

 

Go out and party, hang out with friends, go clubbing, and don't anymore time on the past. Move on like how she's moved on, go fourth and prosper

[paperboy48]

I feel for you man!

 

My ex and I were together for 16 years...within 2 months of BU (her decision), she was in another relationship and still is 7 months later.

 

It sucks....but you've got to do whatever you need to do to get her out of your mind. Go no contact, don't drive near her house, don't look at pics of her, don't look at her FB.

[KatZee]

Jesus christ.. GIRLS BE CRAZY. LYING SACKS OF SHT.... How can I ever trust someone again? There hasn't been a single day where I haven't thought about her.

 

eyyyyyyy be easy. This goes both ways. My ex (MALE) did this exact same thing. Almost three years together, cheated on me, lied straight to my face, played me for a fool for years, dumps me spouting a bunch of lies, and a month to two later he's with some new chick.

 

And he thinks I'm stupid as f.uck b/c he went and deleted all my friends on FB to try and hide this, and then goes with this girl he met at work!!! And not just any job either. it was the job he took to finally move back home to be closer to me. a month after he starts his new job i get dumped for some silly little broad at the ballpark.

 

three years in the toilet. threw me out like garbage. like i was nothing. I will never in my lifetime believe he ever loved me or cared for me. my ex is not human. he's just a thing that uses people for his own benefit.

 

Any person will do this, male or female, if they're f.ucked up enough. It sucks but these people don't deserve us. We should round 'em all up and dump them on their own private island. I bet they'd all have the time of their lives.

[Pogona]

I know this is gonna sound weird but...you shouldn't take it personally. Because it isn't.

 

Dumpers frequently start new relationships quickly after they end the old one. I think this happens for several fairly logical reasons.

 

I'll preface this by saying that I have been on both sides of this thing. I once ended a 4 year relationship and started a new one 3 weeks later. And when my fiance dumped me 2 months before our wedding, it was quite the punch in the gut to see her dating some d-bag 2 weeks after the break up. But I digress. The reasons:

 

1 - They want to forget about you. I started with this one because it's probably the worst to face. Unless she is a completely heartless bitch (unlikely, despite popular belief those girls are rare) she does feel guilty about dumping you. She may not even fully realize it, but she does. Being with someone new helps her take her mind off of the pain she surely caused you. No one likes to think of themselves as having caused someone else pain. Unless she really hated you, which it doesn't sound like she did.

 

2 - They want validation that they made the right decision. This is a big one. Maybe the biggest. New relationships feel great. This new relationship probably feels 100% better then yours did when it ended. Sorry, but you have to admit that's likely true. It may suck to think about but, but you should remember that it doesn't at all mean that the new relationship IS better. It just FEELS that way, 'cause it's new. If she's at all intelligent she knows this, but that won't really matter because it quiets the little voice that wonders whether or not she did the right thing.

 

3 - Your relationship was over before you actually broke up, you just didn't know it yet. The end of the relationship was (presumably) quite unexpected...but only for you. She had time to brace herself, even if only slightly. She had time to think, to rationalize, to get ready. You had none of that. Of course it's taking you more time to get over it.

 

 

These are things I had to realize myself, once upon a time. When the ex moves on so soon is really tough. It makes you feel like maybe she never cared, that maybe you were never really important if you were so easily replaced. HUGE hit to the old self esteem. But the take-away message from the things I listed is this: the fact that she is in a new relationship already doesn't actually say anything about your relationship. She's not doing it to hurt you, but she is doing it on purpose. She didn't just fall into someone else's arms in a blissfully forgetful haze. She probably doesn't really even care whether this new relationship works out or not. She's just trying to move on.

 

I'm not trying to say you should forgive her. But focus on what's important. By which I mean, the fact that she dumped you is the only thing that matters. If you want to hate her for that, go for it. But getting wrapped up in whoever she's dating now is pointless. It will only bring you down. Which is stupid, because as I said it has nothing to do with you.

 

Bitterness kills. You need a healthy dose of "F*ck It." Stop hating her, stop hating yourself, and just focus on living. that's the best advice I can give you right now.

Edited October 2, 2012 by Pogona

[thecobra]

There hasn't been a day where I haven't thought about my EX. Since the last time we talked about a month ago I asked her if she was seeing someone else she said no.. Bunch of BS.. Her sister told me shes never home so where else would she be? She doesn't sleep at home so I got the point. Her sis told me to pretty much just forget about her and that she's no good.

 

I'm just pissed that 2 years she leaves for someone else already so soon. Makes me hate her now. No respect whatsoever.. However, I'm thinking that she either has GIGS or that she needs someone else to keep me off her mind but I highly doubt that..

 

Jesus christ.. GIRLS BE CRAZY. LYING SACKS OF SHT.... How can I ever trust someone again? There hasn't been a single day where I haven't thought about her.

 

That means she was seeing someone before leaving you. usually the family knows and tells you she's no good so you can forget about her... Don't want to sound rude. If you still have her on any social sites you may want to consider blocking or deleting... or taking them off from the news feed if you decide to keep them. It's though

 

The no contact guide from someone here it's very good. READ IT. look for no contact

[thecobra]

I know this is gonna sound weird but...you shouldn't take it personally. Because it isn't.

 

Dumpers frequently start new relationships quickly after they end the old one. I think this happens for several fairly logical reasons.

 

I'll preface this by saying that I have been on both sides of this thing. I once ended a 4 year relationship and started a new one 3 weeks later. And when my fiance dumped me 2 months before our wedding, it was quite the punch in the gut to see her dating some d-bag 2 weeks after the break up. But I digress. The reasons:

 

1 - They want to forget about you. I started with this one because it's probably the worst to face. Unless she is a completely heartless bitch (unlikely, despite popular belief those girls are rare) she does feel guilty about dumping you. She may not even fully realize it, but she does. Being with someone new helps her take her mind off of the pain she surely caused you. No one likes to think of themselves as having caused someone else pain. Unless she really hated you, which it doesn't sound like she did.

 

2 - They want validation that they made the right decision. This is a big one. Maybe the biggest. New relationships feel great. This new relationship probably feels 100% better then yours did when it ended. Sorry, but you have to admit that's likely true. It may suck to think about but, but you should remember that it doesn't at all mean that the new relationship IS better. It just FEELS that way, 'cause it's new. If she's at all intelligent she knows this, but that won't really matter because it quiets the little voice that wonders whether or not she did the right thing.

 

3 - Your relationship was over before you actually broke up, you just didn't know it yet. The end of the relationship was (presumably) quite unexpected...but only for you. She had time to brace herself, even if only slightly. She had time to think, to rationalize, to get ready. You had none of that. Of course it's taking you more time to get over it.

 

 

These are things I had to realize myself, once upon a time. When the ex moves on so soon is really tough. It makes you feel like maybe she never cared, that maybe you were never really important if you were so easily replaced. HUGE hit to the old self esteem. But the take-away message from the things I listed is this: the fact that she is in a new relationship already doesn't actually say anything about your relationship. She's not doing it to hurt you, but she is doing it on purpose. She didn't just fall into someone else's arms in a blissfully forgetful haze. She probably doesn't really even care whether this new relationship works out or not. She's just trying to move on.

 

I'm not trying to say you should forgive her. But focus on what's important. By which I mean, the fact that she dumped you is the only thing that matters. If you want to hate her for that, go for it. But getting wrapped up in whoever she's dating now is pointless. It will only bring you down. Which is stupid, because as I said it has nothing to do with you.

 

Bitterness kills. You need a healthy dose of "F*ck It." Stop hating her, stop hating yourself, and just focus on living. that's the best advice I can give you right now.

 

 

 

would you suggest deleting her from facebook?

[JayL]

Dude, she's not worth it.

 

My ex broke up with me and slept with some random dude she met in the club a week after our break up... THE DAY OF MY ****ING BIRTHDAY!

 

I hate her so ****ing much!

 

In fact, I am a little drunk right now because I randomly found her hair clip in my car which i threw away, but it definitely brought back memories.

 

Holding that hair clip was like holding her... I hated it, it hurts!

[LoveHurts88]

I know this is gonna sound weird but...you shouldn't take it personally. Because it isn't.

 

Dumpers frequently start new relationships quickly after they end the old one. I think this happens for several fairly logical reasons.

 

I'll preface this by saying that I have been on both sides of this thing. I once ended a 4 year relationship and started a new one 3 weeks later. And when my fiance dumped me 2 months before our wedding, it was quite the punch in the gut to see her dating some d-bag 2 weeks after the break up. But I digress. The reasons:

 

1 - They want to forget about you. I started with this one because it's probably the worst to face. Unless she is a completely heartless bitch (unlikely, despite popular belief those girls are rare) she does feel guilty about dumping you. She may not even fully realize it, but she does. Being with someone new helps her take her mind off of the pain she surely caused you. No one likes to think of themselves as having caused someone else pain. Unless she really hated you, which it doesn't sound like she did.

 

2 - They want validation that they made the right decision. This is a big one. Maybe the biggest. New relationships feel great. This new relationship probably feels 100% better then yours did when it ended. Sorry, but you have to admit that's likely true. It may suck to think about but, but you should remember that it doesn't at all mean that the new relationship IS better. It just FEELS that way, 'cause it's new. If she's at all intelligent she knows this, but that won't really matter because it quiets the little voice that wonders whether or not she did the right thing.

 

3 - Your relationship was over before you actually broke up, you just didn't know it yet. The end of the relationship was (presumably) quite unexpected...but only for you. She had time to brace herself, even if only slightly. She had time to think, to rationalize, to get ready. You had none of that. Of course it's taking you more time to get over it.

 

 

These are things I had to realize myself, once upon a time. When the ex moves on so soon is really tough. It makes you feel like maybe she never cared, that maybe you were never really important if you were so easily replaced. HUGE hit to the old self esteem. But the take-away message from the things I listed is this: the fact that she is in a new relationship already doesn't actually say anything about your relationship. She's not doing it to hurt you, but she is doing it on purpose. She didn't just fall into someone else's arms in a blissfully forgetful haze. She probably doesn't really even care whether this new relationship works out or not. She's just trying to move on.

 

I'm not trying to say you should forgive her. But focus on what's important. By which I mean, the fact that she dumped you is the only thing that matters. If you want to hate her for that, go for it. But getting wrapped up in whoever she's dating now is pointless. It will only bring you down. Which is stupid, because as I said it has nothing to do with you.

 

Bitterness kills. You need a healthy dose of "F*ck It." Stop hating her, stop hating yourself, and just focus on living. that's the best advice I can give you right now.

 

Thanks, this post really helped. I was thinking the same thing... I'm trying to move on. I haven't spoken to her in about 20 days. But I do think about her everyday. At work at home no matter where I am I still think of her. It just sucks knowing she's not "the one" I will be with for the rest of my life because I truly do Love her

[LoveHurts88]

Apparently I have an outdated Dumper Handbook or mine is missing some pages.

 

I double checked and I didn't see anything that indicated if you break up with someone... You are actually sill in a committed relationship with them until X amount of time has passed.

 

Can someone on LS please tell me the approximate amount of time a dumper is required to wait before they date, touch, kiss or sleep with someone else?

 

Okay so she can't date whenever she wants to after breaking up with me.. Okay fair enough.. But in order for her to do that she must have been seeing this guy even though she was with me... Cheating??? Even if she wasnt' when I asked her if she was seeing someone she said NO. LIES after LIES. MAN the F up and tell the truth is all im asking.

[LoveHurts88]

anymore advice? I need to move on quick. I don't want to think of her and this d-bag. I know she's not worth my time effort or anything anymore. LOVE IS BLIND.

[Biscous]

Like someone said, she was probably emotionally 'over' the relationship before you knew.

 

NO ONE emotionally mature can just go into a new relationship within a month. They either do it for validation or fear of being alone.

 

My ex broke up with me in late May/Early June. Within three weeks I discovered that her and the previous guy before me were talking. Boom, 2-3 weeks later they are living together. All within this time period up until now SHE has been the one texting me trying to get me to respond. "Biscous please talk to me".

 

She is not clearly in the correct emotional mind state.

 

Just move forward dude. I know it hurts. Maybe she's hurting too in a way and regretting it. You don't know. You can only focus on what you can control, and that is moving on.

[JayL]

Apparently I have an outdated Dumper Handbook or mine is missing some pages.

 

I double checked and I didn't see anything that indicated if you break up with someone... You are actually sill in a committed relationship with them until X amount of time has passed.

 

Can someone on LS please tell me the approximate amount of time a dumper is required to wait before they date, touch, kiss or sleep with someone else?

 

There's no approximate amount of time a dumper is required to wait before they date someone else, but there's this thing called "respect", which unfortunately, many people don't have these days.

[suladas]

There is no way to move on quickly, only time will make you forget her and meet someone new. The best you can do is keep yourself as busy as possible to keep your mind off her.

 

I'm at about 2 1/2 months, the only time I think about her is usually at night, or other times i'm quite bored. Anytime i'm busy, or with friends or family I don't even think about her. Time helps a lot, everyday is better. Then again, i'm off work hurt so i'm home all day, so it hasn't been easy at all.

 

At least you know the only thing to do is move on, that makes it easier. Other people, me included struggled with that for a while.

 

At this point i'm not sure if it's better to stay single until you're completely over her, or try to meet someone new. I'm back and forth on that.

[suladas]

I don't believe you really need to wait if you don't want to. As long as you're not engaging in anything to start a new relationship while still in the old one, it's fine. I mean if someone is still in a relationship they know is over and seeking someone new, then dropping the bomb when they have found someone that is wrong.

 

Yes they owe nothing to the other person. But then again, they have nothing to complain about if someone does it to them. Or maybe one day them being a douche to a ex will bite them in a$$. I absolutely gaurentee you you have more ties to a ex then you think.

 

Until I seen mutual friends on facebook I had no idea I had ties to my ex through friends, I couldn't believe it, I though there was no way. A distant friend of mine's gf, works with my ex's ex husband. A friend of mines little brother is friends with my ex's daughter. And I live in a city of over a million people, not exactly small and still seems like you have a connection to everyone even if it's through friends of friends of friends or whatever.

 

What you do today might bite you in the a$$ tomorrow.

[msfreebyme]

My ex did the same thing to me...got with another girl 2 months after a 3 year relationship and I had to hear from someone else he was sleeping with her after only knowing her a few days. He was my first too =/