edelveis Posted September 29, 2012 Posted September 29, 2012 hi.tonight i saw my ex out after the contact she made 2 days ago.i was outside a bar and she was inside and she saw me and looked at me but i pretended i didnt see her.when i got inside with my friend we sat at a free table where i couldnt see her or her see me.because its the first time i see her after the break up it was nice that we sat there. she was with her friends and another guy who is most probably her new boyfriend.well i didnt expect this but i felt a bit bothered and sad and i missed her again.i am not back to zero and i dont want to make things look tragic but i am still bothered.i dont feel that strong right now and it pisses me off that i feel like that.normally i shouldnt give a damn.do you think this is something normal?the last thing i need now is a setback.especially now that i was feeliing so strong and so over her.
LostOne1 Posted September 29, 2012 Posted September 29, 2012 I always imagined what happens if I see my ex.. in fact I tried once to purposly to crash into her. Luckily I stopped after and went back home. Honestly, I think my ex would give me the cold shoulder. I imagined she would feel bad or hurt and come talk to me. But I really think she would ignore me and it would hurt even more to see her sitting there and know that it's supposed to be me sitting next to her holding her making her laugh... I feel your pain, but it's best to know that talking to her would be worse. All you can do is know that she hurt you and she's not worth your time to be around. 1
Simon Phoenix Posted September 30, 2012 Posted September 30, 2012 Actually wasn't that horrible, though it wasn't awesome either. I hung out with mine in a small group on two separate days a few weeks back. First day she was acting cold/distant/annoyed/aloof, though she'd break character to laugh at something I said or smile at me when I'd call her by the pet name I gave her. Then she'd instantly go back. The second day she was almost normal and relatively friendly. But yeah, I handled the whole thing better than she did. However, hanging out with her, even on the second day, sucked compared to what we had before. If there was a way to go back to what we had before instantly, then sign me the f--k up. But this semi-awkward whatever we had was a bunch of suck. And after she tossed me a few crumbs after that she went radio silence when I asked what she was doing on her birthday. So yeah, I don't need to deal with that.
PissOfMind Posted September 30, 2012 Posted September 30, 2012 4 days ago I went to the pub with friends and ran into my ex after 9 month NC ( initiated by him and his disappearance, basically). At first he pretended he couldn't see me, but then when we basically bumped into each other he was kinda forced to look at me. He smiled, I smiled, we said hello and basically chatted for a while about all and nothing, but it was really weird and I couldn't help a) poking fun at him b) thinking how ridiculous he really is. As you may guess, he had very little to say about his own disappearing act but I didn't even delve into that apart from saying that "It sucked big time". He just laughed foolishly in response: "Yeah, I know". Luckily he was with his friend so I talked mainly to him and basically didn't pay much attention to the ex. After that I just said bye. Yeah, I also imagined that situation before, I played different scenarios in my head, but now, again I realised that "whatever you think about , don't try to imagine it very precisely cos it will be all different anyway'. And different it was, not only because it happned far sooner than I thought. Surprisingly however, after the first rush of blood to the head , I realised he didn't impress me anymore, actually he is as miserable as I thought he is. He even admitted that he had been following me on fb to see what I was up to (yeah, he did care what I was up to, but didn't bother to tell me that our relationship was over). Sooo happy not to have to deal with him anymore and to see things for what they really are!
Simon Phoenix Posted September 30, 2012 Posted September 30, 2012 4 days ago I went to the pub with friends and ran into my ex after 9 month NC ( initiated by him and his disappearance, basically). At first he pretended he couldn't see me, but then when we basically bumped into each other he was kinda forced to look at me. He smiled, I smiled, we said hello and basically chatted for a while about all and nothing, but it was really weird and I couldn't help a) poking fun at him b) thinking how ridiculous he really is. As you may guess, he had very little to say about his own disappearing act but I didn't even delve into that apart from saying that "It sucked big time". He just laughed foolishly in response: "Yeah, I know". Luckily he was with his friend so I talked mainly to him and basically didn't pay much attention to the ex. After that I just said bye. Yeah, I also imagined that situation before, I played different scenarios in my head, but now, again I realised that "whatever you think about , don't try to imagine it very precisely cos it will be all different anyway'. And different it was, not only because it happned far sooner than I thought. Surprisingly however, after the first rush of blood to the head , I realised he didn't impress me anymore, actually he is as miserable as I thought he is. He even admitted that he had been following me on fb to see what I was up to (yeah, he did care what I was up to, but didn't bother to tell me that our relationship was over). Sooo happy not to have to deal with him anymore and to see things for what they really are! Yeah, one of the things I took out of meeting my ex was that she was as miserable about how things went down as I was. That was almost empowering in a way, knowing that I wasn't the only one struggling.
tom3.1415 Posted October 1, 2012 Posted October 1, 2012 My 1st time I saw one particular ex I had imagined she would say hi and chat for a minute but she tried to ignore me. I stopped her to say hi but she was unfriendly and hurried away after saying "hi, I gotta run". Doesn't sound that bad but I was so ridiculously still in love with her and trying to process so much heartache and all these other emotions that it was an absolute nightmare. I had a knot in my stomach until I broke down and took an Ativan a day later. Then for years I had dreams where I was somewhere where she was around, like at a college or a concert or anywhere with lots of people, and would look for her and often found her and she was still ignoring me. Then wake up and feel crappy.
LostOne1 Posted October 1, 2012 Posted October 1, 2012 My 1st time I saw one particular ex I had imagined she would say hi and chat for a minute but she tried to ignore me. I stopped her to say hi but she was unfriendly and hurried away after saying "hi, I gotta run". Doesn't sound that bad but I was so ridiculously still in love with her and trying to process so much heartache and all these other emotions that it was an absolute nightmare. I had a knot in my stomach until I broke down and took an Ativan a day later. Then for years I had dreams where I was somewhere where she was around, like at a college or a concert or anywhere with lots of people, and would look for her and often found her and she was still ignoring me. Then wake up and feel crappy. those are the worst dreams man.. I have had them too ones where my ex is finally ncie to me and wants to work it out and sense I've changed and gotten better. Then ones where she absolutely hates me and is super cold and is with someone else, basically has no love or care left for me at all.
Author edelveis Posted October 3, 2012 Author Posted October 3, 2012 Guys you shouldnt care about how ur ex feels for you..you must keep your head high and move on..it starts with a decision you have to make with yourself.and you wont be even seeing dreams like these.. As for me days have passed and i havent seen her again and she didnt contact me again..i am glad about how i reacted because it was a dreadcrump.She has no place in my life anymore and i know it but guys this whole thing took me a few steps back.now instead of seeing the light at the end of the tunel i see her eyes..but i hope this is the last step of my healing proccess and i am so glad she has no power over me now.!
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