salem mark Posted September 28, 2012 Posted September 28, 2012 My ex (who dumped me) asked me to visit her this week(she lives 1000 miles away) She initiated emailing me after 2yrs apart. BTW, We had a very intense, passionate relationship. I was crazy about her and still haven't gotten over her. I know I need to move on) Ive been working on my busisness and havent dated anyone since her. I have been NC but she always resurfaces. This week she emailed me and said she missed me, A month ago she told she was dating someone and I never responded back. Silence for a month and now this. Does she think we can be friends?, i've never given any indication that is what i wanted. what is she doing/thinking?
Author salem mark Posted September 28, 2012 Author Posted September 28, 2012 get this now she wants to skpe each other, she asked in email if i had an account
soccerrprp Posted September 28, 2012 Posted September 28, 2012 She may have regrets or feels guilty and wants to be friends, who knows really. BUT, you should not visit her at your expense!!! If she really wants you (and you want her back), make her make the drive or pay for the plane ticket. Also, let her know that friendship is not what you want. Let her know what you want and move on from there. 1
Author salem mark Posted September 28, 2012 Author Posted September 28, 2012 She may have regrets or feels guilty and wants to be friends, who knows really. BUT, you should not visit her at your expense!!! If she really wants you (and you want her back), make her make the drive or pay for the plane ticket. Also, let her know that friendship is not what you want. Let her know what you want and move on from there. scprp wow that solid advice thanks ( i was thinking exctly what you said, I guess it hepls to hear it from someone else) i cant just be friends with her, why don't women get this!
CC12 Posted September 29, 2012 Posted September 29, 2012 i cant just be friends with her, why don't women get this! A lot of people think they can handle being friends with an ex. It rarely works, though. Have you been responding to her most recent emails?
Author salem mark Posted September 29, 2012 Author Posted September 29, 2012 yes but just short responses, and not right away, I have to admit, I've known many womwn, and have had several LTRs' and she is the most exciting woman I've ever met and its hard to shake her out of my life. I think people on this site are quick tosay move on and you'll meet someone else, I dont agree , if you have any standards, its rare when you fall madly in love with someone
Author salem mark Posted September 29, 2012 Author Posted September 29, 2012 I havent heard her voice in over 2 years, and her skype pic looks fantastic should I call her back? or better to ignore, this chick really crushed me and pulled the rug out from me for no reason and out of the blue
2sunny Posted September 29, 2012 Posted September 29, 2012 Seems she contacts you when things don't work out with other men. Does that make you her priority or her backup plan? Being her backup plan could keep you in limbo for years or even decades. Is that what you wish for? IF she's willing to make ONLY YOU her priority - then yes, give it a go - if not, then I see no reason as she's just setting you back...but you are ALLOWING it. 1
beyond Posted September 30, 2012 Posted September 30, 2012 yes but just short responses, and not right away, I have to admit, I've known many womwn, and have had several LTRs' and she is the most exciting woman I've ever met and its hard to shake her out of my life. I think people on this site are quick tosay move on and you'll meet someone else, I dont agree , if you have any standards, its rare when you fall madly in love with someone SM, if you have any standards, you won't travel 1000 miles to see someone who left 2 years ago and told you she has a boyfriend. 1
Minka333 Posted September 30, 2012 Posted September 30, 2012 You meet an "amazing girl". Break up. Date tons of others. Compare. She still sticks out the most and no one else compares. It is perfectly understandable why you still desire her. Sometimes we only see the value of a person when they are no longer with us. But when you try to reconnect, make sure you are both on the same page. Meaning she knows or realized your worth and not just stringing you along.* Only you can gauge her sincerity. Only you can feel if you were just option b or whatsoever. You can determine it by how much effort she is willing to put forth. Then you both can work around it to make the relationship work.
TaraMaiden Posted September 30, 2012 Posted September 30, 2012 "Please contact me if you intend to make another go of our relationship, and we can go to relationship counselling together. if this is not your intention, then please don't contact me again. I'm not your back-burner guy or soft place to land. Friendship is off the cards." Put the ball in her court, be up-front and plain in your intention. Sometimes, beating about the bush doesn't work. Nobody ever leapt a ditch in two steps. 1
Author salem mark Posted September 30, 2012 Author Posted September 30, 2012 wow at hit me between the eyes, very correct
Author salem mark Posted September 30, 2012 Author Posted September 30, 2012 "Please contact me if you intend to make another go of our relationship, and we can go to relationship counselling together. if this is not your intention, then please don't contact me again. I'm not your back-burner guy or soft place to land. Friendship is off the cards." Put the ball in her court, be up-front and plain in your intention. Sometimes, beating about the bush doesn't work. Nobody ever leapt a ditch in two steps. solid advice tm
Author salem mark Posted October 4, 2012 Author Posted October 4, 2012 I agreed to allow her on my skype account and now she has been instant messaging every morning and thruout the day. She always initiates and I take awhile to respond. She's been very positive, blowing kisses, smiley faces and pleasant how are you's etc. She mentioned a couple of times that she wished I was around (i live in a different state). early this week she said she wanted to fly out to visit me alone, and tried calling a couple times, I never picked up. She cant think she is going to stay with me and nothing is going to happen. A part of me thinks she is just talking to me because she is bored at work, I'm thinking about going NC again and see what she will then do, NC seems to work well with her as far as proclaimiing her intentions. we were lovers = never friends, why would she think we can be friends?
2sunny Posted October 4, 2012 Posted October 4, 2012 I agreed to allow her on my skype account and now she has been instant messaging every morning and thruout the day. She always initiates and I take awhile to respond. She's been very positive, blowing kisses, smiley faces and pleasant how are you's etc. She mentioned a couple of times that she wished I was around (i live in a different state). early this week she said she wanted to fly out to visit me alone, and tried calling a couple times, I never picked up. She cant think she is going to stay with me and nothing is going to happen. A part of me thinks she is just talking to me because she is bored at work, I'm thinking about going NC again and see what she will then do, NC seems to work well with her as far as proclaimiing her intentions. we were lovers = never friends, why would she think we can be friends? She's offering you sex... Are you going to accept or cut her out so she stops trying to manipulate you...?
Author salem mark Posted October 4, 2012 Author Posted October 4, 2012 She's offering you sex... Are you going to accept or cut her out so she stops trying to manipulate you...? 2sunny, she wants to get laid? u think she's sneaking around on this other guy?
2sunny Posted October 4, 2012 Posted October 4, 2012 2sunny, she wants to get laid? u think she's sneaking around on this other guy? Only if you ALLOW her to. Why can't you date someone new who isn't so needy?
Author salem mark Posted October 4, 2012 Author Posted October 4, 2012 Only if you ALLOW her to. Why can't you date someone new who isn't so needy? i live in a rural area in W MI, there are no quality single women here, they are all married Amish types I lived in Boston, totally opposite environment and would meet other woman my age (40) i guess I'll move back when able, I love women and like their company
2sunny Posted October 4, 2012 Posted October 4, 2012 We you saying you're desperate for any attention from a gal?
Author salem mark Posted October 4, 2012 Author Posted October 4, 2012 no but i would like to meet a woman i can do things with
Recommended Posts