Is he interested, or is he good at playing the game?

[Ambry]

So, I am probably being ridiculously stupid, here... But I have read far too many relationship books for my own good, and I have all these crazy "rules" and stuff spinning around in my head, and they are more than likely doing more harm than good.

I started dating a guy at the beginning of the month. He is very sweet, affectionate, etc. He compliments me, you get my drift.

On our third date, we watched a movie and he put his arm around me, kissed me on the forehead, the cheek, and there were the occasional "lingering pecks"

Fourth date, it was the same drill, only let's add a bit more intimacy into this equation. Before he did anything, he would first ask me "Is this okay?" No, no... We didn't have sex. After being intimate, we cuddled, and he kissed me on the forehead, etc. When we parted, he told me he would speak to me soon, and kissed me.

It seems like he is genuinely interested, but I really think I've tripped myself up from reading all those darn books. (Especially, "Stop Getting Dumped" ) I worry that he was "very good at playing the game" and won't call me again. A lot of the books I read really made guys seem as though they were nothing more than sexually motivated animals, and there is this whole elaborate ritual (COMPLETE WITH STAGES) you have to perfect in order to rope on in... otherwise he will flee back into the wilderness.

Even reading this, I think I sound incredibly paranoid... Your typical girl curled up on the couch with her cats and pint of ben and jerrys....

I just wanted to get the advice of neutral third parties for my own sanity

 

Is he interested? Or is he just VERY good at playing the game? Was I intimate too soon, thusly screwing up the potential for a real relationship with this person?

Edited September 28, 2012 by Ambry
spelling error

[turt]

Keep going and see what happens. You're just going to push him away if he is interested if you worry about this the whole time.

[oaks]

What do you want, and what would you like to happen on the next date? If you're so passive that the guy has to lead all the time then, yes, you'll be left wondering what he wants.

 

What do you want? Go get it!

[todreaminblue]

So, I am probably being ridiculously stupid, here... But I have read far too many relationship books for my own good, and I have all these crazy "rules" and stuff spinning around in my head, and they are more than likely doing more harm than good.

I started dating a guy at the beginning of the month. He is very sweet, affectionate, etc. He compliments me, you get my drift.

On our third date, we watched a movie and he put his arm around me, kissed me on the forehead, the cheek, and there were the occasional "lingering pecks"

Fourth date, it was the same drill, only let's add a bit more intimacy into this equation. Before he did anything, he would first ask me "Is this okay?" No, no... We didn't have sex. After being intimate, we cuddled, and he kissed me on the forehead, etc. When we parted, he told me he would speak to me soon, and kissed me.

It seems like he is genuinely interested, but I really think I've tripped myself up from reading all those darn books. (Especially, "Stop Getting Dumped" ) I worry that he was "very good at playing the game" and won't call me again. A lot of the books I read really made guys seem as though they were nothing more than sexually motivated animals, and there is this whole elaborate ritual (COMPLETE WITH STAGES) you have to perfect in order to rope on in... otherwise he will flee back into the wilderness.

Even reading this, I think I sound incredibly paranoid... Your typical girl curled up on the couch with her cats and pint of ben and jerrys....

I just wanted to get the advice of neutral third parties for my own sanity

 

Is he interested? Or is he just VERY good at playing the game? Was I intimate too soon, thusly screwing up the potential for a real relationship with this person?

 

 

over analysing things always gets me confused.....spun around and looking backwards.....try to just see where it takes you and trust him he hasnt done anything to prove otherwise...he sounds like a gentleman.... go with your heart forget the books...best wishes in non analysis.....deb