counterman Posted January 8, 2013 Posted January 8, 2013 As a short guy myself, I would say that I have been discounted many times because of my height. But why bother with women who rule me out because of a physical feature? There is so much more to me. I just don't focus on those girls and focus more on the girls who don't care.
bodhesatva Posted January 8, 2013 Posted January 8, 2013 So there are a lot of different variables that make a man more or less attractive in general. Just off the top of my head: Looks Height Career/money Kindness Sense of humor Education/Intelligence Confidence You can also include lots of other things if I wanted to stop and think about it. I just wrote those off the top of my head in a few seconds. The point is this: yes, height is one of the things most girls consider. But the counterpoint is: there are lots of other things women consider, too. If you were to meet a man who was an exact clone of you in every way except he was 2'' taller, then probably yes, he'd do better with the ladies. But realistically speaking, no such man exists. There are vanishingly few men in the world who are simultaneously very funny, very confident, highly educated, tall, quite handsome, rich, and tenderly caring. Everyone has their problems. While you sit here and worry about your height, there are millions of other men wishing they could make women laugh more, or wish they had gone to a better school so they were more articulate and learned, or wish they made more money. So I'll give you two options: we can all wallow in our imperfections, or we can agree that a nation full of insecure men doesn't do anyone good and that we should recognize that nobody is perfect. I think the latter choice is much more productive. 2
FitChick Posted January 8, 2013 Posted January 8, 2013 If being short was considered the kiss of death in mating, there would be no short men as their DNA would have died out. Someone is having sex with them.
Vercetti Posted January 8, 2013 Posted January 8, 2013 PUA was stated so just had to post this... ...
bodhesatva Posted January 8, 2013 Posted January 8, 2013 If being short was considered the kiss of death in mating, there would be no short men as their DNA would have died out. Someone is having sex with them. Not that I disagree with your sentiment, but I do want to point out there is a lot of space between "kiss of death in mating" and "not a problem at all." It's definitely fair to say that shorter guys have it a bit harder in dating than taller guys do in the US. But so do guys who aren't very funny. So do guys who aren't very rich. So do obese people. So do ugly people. So do people who are less educated. And so do guys who have a stutter. And so on and so forth. In fact, here's a thought that tends to help people: let's say your girlfriend (or boyfriend) breaks up with you, and later starts dating a person who is taller than you. Can that make you feel insecure? Sure. On the other hand, the person is almost certainly not as great as you in some way. Perhaps they're not as funny as you are, or not as nice. Perhaps they're taller but otherwise not as handsome. Perhaps they aren't educated. Perhaps they have a small penis or very small boobs. Again, everyone has their problems, and very, very few people are going to find a partner who is simultaneously very funny, tall, very handsome, well educated, makes great money, is kind and caring to others, who is confident, and who is great in the sack.
JuneJulySeptember Posted January 8, 2013 Posted January 8, 2013 (edited) It's definitely fair to say that shorter guys have it a bit harder in dating than taller guys do in the US. But so do guys who aren't very funny. So do guys who aren't very rich. So do obese people. So do ugly people. So do people who are less educated. And so do guys who have a stutter. And so on and so forth. Not a good analogy because height is the only factor of those that cannot be controlled. And I know the women are going to chime in and say leg lengthening. People who have had that done cannot even run anymore. It is not safe. Ugly can't really be changed either. So, that's kind of the same boat. That's why you see SO MANY short guys complain. It's something that's SO important, right up there with looks, yet COMPLETELY out of their control. Edited January 8, 2013 by JuneJulySeptember
bodhesatva Posted January 8, 2013 Posted January 8, 2013 Not a good analogy because height is the only factor of those that cannot be controlled. And I know the women are going to chime in and say leg lengthening. People who have had that done cannot even run anymore. It is not safe. Ugly can't really be changed either. So, that's kind of the same boat. That's why you see SO MANY short guys complain. It's something that's SO important, almost up there with looks, yet COMPLETELY out of their control. I wouldn't say sense of humor or intelligence are things completely within someone's control, either. And I'm sure you've heard of cyclical poverty, where it's a lot harder for a poor person to rise up than it is for a wealthy person. And clearly height can be controlled in a way -- people are getting taller overall, and that is happening because of our dietary choices. You make the right dietary choices growing up, you'll be taller than you otherwise would be. It's all shades of grey; very few things are completely within our control, and very few things are totally out of our control. I'd agree that we have less control over our height than we do other factors, though. Lastly I can come up with others, though; penis size, for example. Women also respond better to men with deeper voices, as another. There are lots of factors men and women take in to account, and nobody will be at the top of the spectrum in all of these categories.
JuneJulySeptember Posted January 8, 2013 Posted January 8, 2013 I wouldn't say sense of humor or intelligence are things completely within someone's control, either. And I'm sure you've heard of cyclical poverty, where it's a lot harder for a poor person to rise up than it is for a wealthy person. And clearly height can be controlled in a way -- people are getting taller overall, and that is happening because of our dietary choices. You make the right dietary choices growing up, you'll be taller than you otherwise would be. It's all shades of grey; very few things are completely within our control, and very few things are totally out of our control. I'd agree that we have less control over our height than we do other factors, though. Lastly I can come up with others, though; penis size, for example. Women also respond better to men with deeper voices, as another. There are lots of factors men and women take in to account, and nobody will be at the top of the spectrum in all of these categories. Things like penis size and deep voice are PREFERENCES. They are only dealbreakers to the very most shallow and picky women. Height is a dealbreaker for MOST women. You need to put things in perspective. Like one woman I remember had a response. "Yea. I like tall guys and I'm a short woman. So what? Guys like girls with big boobs and I have little boobs." Completely different. Small boobs are a dealbreaker for very few men. Big boobs are a preference. I think that you would find that if most women said "I prefer to date tall men, but would totally date a guy within an inch or two of my height" you would hear very few complaints from any short guys anymore. The truth of the matter is, it's not that way by a long shot. 2
SteveC80 Posted January 8, 2013 Posted January 8, 2013 90% of women would rather a tall man but theyres only so many to go around so tons of women will have to settle for short men
bodhesatva Posted January 8, 2013 Posted January 8, 2013 (edited) Things like penis size and deep voice are PREFERENCES. They are only dealbreakers to the very most shallow and picky women. Height is a dealbreaker for MOST women. You need to put things in perspective. I disagree strongly. I feel it is you who needs to keep things in perspective. Height is also a preference. There are women who do not care about height, women who prefer short men, and even entire cultures which show no preference for taller men. Essentially what you are saying is that being short can be a worse problem than some other problems. That's probably true. But you seem to think it's easy to get rich if you start off poor, and that liking taller men isn't a preference. Insisting that your problems are the true worst problems and that nobody else understands how bad you've got and that everybody else has it easy compared to you -- this is what lacks perspective, I think. Everybody has problems. Arguing about who's problems are worse seems like the world's lamest finger pointing competition to see who wallow deepest in their own insecurities. Almost everyone feels like their problems are the worst, their problems are special, sure-everyone-else-has-problems-but-mine-are-the-worst. If you want to take that perspective in life, get in line. Edited January 8, 2013 by bodhesatva 1
silicone Posted January 8, 2013 Posted January 8, 2013 And clearly height can be controlled in a way -- people are getting taller overall, and that is happening because of our dietary choices. You make the right dietary choices growing up, you'll be taller than you otherwise would be. . No, that is not completely true. Your height is still largely determined by genetics. Your diet only influences your overall height. Human height has been increasing due to a number of things, mostly due to technological advances.
JuneJulySeptember Posted January 8, 2013 Posted January 8, 2013 Everybody has problems. Arguing about who's problems are worse seems like the world's lamest finger pointing competition to see who wallow deepest in their own insecurities. No, I agree with this. But I have some of the other problems too. Height is the worst IMO, because you can't do anything about it. It depends. The shorter you are, the worse it is. If you're 5'8" and whining about it all the time, yea you probably need to shut up. If you're 5'2", you have a legit gripe.
silicone Posted January 8, 2013 Posted January 8, 2013 If you're 5'2", you have a legit gripe. PS, you get used to everyone being taller than you, at this height.
sillyanswer Posted January 8, 2013 Posted January 8, 2013 I've been turned down for being too tall, so be careful what you wish for...
somedude81 Posted January 8, 2013 Posted January 8, 2013 If being short was considered the kiss of death in mating, there would be no short men as their DNA would have died out. Someone is having sex with them. The problem is that some cultures are fine with shorter men so they keep reproducing. My dad's side of the family is Cuban and everybody is short over there so it's no big deal. My 5'6 grandfather married my 5'2 grandmother and had kids. My dad came to the US when he was about 5 years old and somehow he grew up to be 5'10 which is tall enough for the women over here and he married a pretty, white woman. Unfortunately he passed along his fu*king short genes and had two boys, one 5'7 and the other 5'6 me. If my dad was 5'6 like his father, he would absolutely not have married my mother. It's fu*king ridiculous being half white, half Cuban and being so fu*king short, looking like I'm white and growing up in a predominately white area. Just makes me some piece of sh*t runt. Being 5'6 would be fine if I lived in Cuba or Miami and I could go after the Cuban girls who don't mind a short guy. But nope, I'm in a part of the world where women get sick even thinking about sleeping with a guy under 5'9.
FitChick Posted January 8, 2013 Posted January 8, 2013 Being 5'6 would be fine if I lived in Cuba or Miami and I could go after the Cuban girls who don't mind a short guy. If it's that important to you, start looking for a job on the east coast -- plenty of Cubans and Puerto Ricans. 1
JuneJulySeptember Posted January 8, 2013 Posted January 8, 2013 Being 5'6 would be fine if I lived in Cuba or Miami and I could go after the Cuban girls who don't mind a short guy. But nope, I'm in a part of the world where women get sick even thinking about sleeping with a guy under 5'9. Lol. It says in your profile you're from SoCal. Nowhere in the states is the average height shorter than there. Mexicans and Central Americans are way shorter than Cubans and people in Florida. There's Asian girls too who are shorter. In general, I'd say the average height in SoCal is probably an inch or two shorter than anywhere in the middle of the US. 1
MrCastle Posted January 8, 2013 Posted January 8, 2013 90% of women would rather a tall man but theyres only so many to go around so tons of women will have to settle for short men Right. I've said it numerous times but I guess I'll say it again: Average is average for a reason--most people fall into it. Very rarely in life do I come across someone who is significantly short or significantly tall. Most men simply aren't 5'10+ Sure, most women would want that tall guy, just like most guys would want large breasts, big ass, and a comically small waist, but that's not the average. If all women waited around for Thor-looking nordic gods, and men waited around for women that looked like Wonder Woman, no one would be getting laid.
somedude81 Posted January 8, 2013 Posted January 8, 2013 If it's that important to you, start looking for a job on the east coast -- plenty of Cubans and Puerto Ricans. I'm hardly at a stage in my life where I can just take off to the other side of the country. I also don't know any Spanish at all. Lol. It says in your profile you're from SoCal. Nowhere in the states is the average height shorter than there. Mexicans and Central Americans are way shorter than Cubans and people in Florida. There's Asian girls too who are shorter. In general, I'd say the average height in SoCal is probably an inch or two shorter than anywhere in the middle of the US. Uh, try telling that to the girls that live here who are only interested in dating men 5'10 or taller. And yes I have pursued Hispanic and Asian girls. I'm not Hispanic enough for the Hispanic girls and the Asian girls only want Asian guys or the top white guys, which I am neither.
JuneJulySeptember Posted January 8, 2013 Posted January 8, 2013 Uh, try telling that to the girls that live here who are only interested in dating men 5'10 or taller. And yes I have pursued Hispanic and Asian girls. I'm not Hispanic enough for the Hispanic girls and the Asian girls only want Asian guys or the top white guys, which I am neither. Well. I'm not saying you're wrong. But it definitely won't be any better in Miami. Probably more shallow than LA. In fact, definitely so.
MrCastle Posted January 8, 2013 Posted January 8, 2013 I also don't know any Spanish at all. Neither do I and I'm puerto rican. You don't need to speak spanish to get a spanish chick. This is America. English will get you by.
ThaWholigan Posted January 8, 2013 Posted January 8, 2013 I'm hardly at a stage in my life where I can just take off to the other side of the country. I also don't know any Spanish at all. But I thought your main goal in life is to find a GF. How do you know she doesn't live in NY? Or somewhere like that? Considering this is such an important thing in your life you feel you are missing out on, then surely you can make concessions to move possibly in the future, no? How badly do you want a GF then? 1
somedude81 Posted January 8, 2013 Posted January 8, 2013 But I thought your main goal in life is to find a GF. How do you know she doesn't live in NY? Or somewhere like that? Considering this is such an important thing in your life you feel you are missing out on, then surely you can make concessions to move possibly in the future, no? How badly do you want a GF then? How do I know that my future wife isn't in Laos? I should move there right now and find out!
sillyanswer Posted January 8, 2013 Posted January 8, 2013 I also don't know any Spanish at all. Go to a class. You might meet a cute girl there with whom you can practise to be a cunning linguist.
ThaWholigan Posted January 8, 2013 Posted January 8, 2013 How do I know that my future wife isn't in Laos? I should move there right now and find out! You get what I mean. Don't rule out things like that - you keep looking for obstacles rather than solutions.
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