kaylan Posted September 28, 2012 Posted September 28, 2012 (edited) I wanna know what women think about this. Im closing in on 26 years of age, and will soon jump back into online dating for a little while. Im basically open to all possibilities...ie...short term dating, long term dating, platonic friends, and MAYBE a fling or two if I meet women I can trust. Anyways, while I am still young, I want to have my hand at dating older women. I want to see what it is like, and see what I can learn as a person. And I wont lie...the idea of being with a more experienced older gal seems really sexy and would be a relief for once. I feel thered be less drama and less rushing, unsurety, insecurity, and hang ups that come with women my age. I was thinking of making my age range 21 to 46. Girls under 21 come off as kids to me, and women over 46 are getting to close to the age where I see them as motherly (considering my mom is in her 50s). I was wondering what women of various ages would think of such an age range. Tbh I primarily would want to date women age 30 to 45 for a while (ideally over 40), but I feel thatd look weird to some. Thoughts? Also...could I put something in my profile that shows that although Im open to women my age and a little younger, I have a preference for meeting older gals? Edited September 28, 2012 by kaylan
yongyong Posted September 28, 2012 Posted September 28, 2012 dude, it's going to look creepy if you put ~46 years old. Just act like other people. make it look normal on profile and act differently behind. (hit on milfs by messaging them) I say 21~31 should be fine. I know most girls will put 'any races' to appear as 'open minded' but they actually don't do that. 2
ThaWholigan Posted September 28, 2012 Posted September 28, 2012 Mine used to be 18-38 but I switched to 20-30 because I kept getting messaged by really young girls and cuckold women. On POF I don't have an age range.
GirlontheLam Posted September 28, 2012 Posted September 28, 2012 46 sounds a little old. That is 20 years older. How about 21-36?
suladas Posted September 28, 2012 Posted September 28, 2012 Good luck. I tried for a bit when I did OLD and nothing at 23 I found anyone over about 27 wasn't interested. I'm assuming because they think with the age gap it won't work and you'll seem immature. It's not something that's easy, and if your age is said too soon it will ruin it. I got lucky getting to know her quite a bit before she found out my age, and by then it wasn't a big deal to her. But the pressure from family and friends that the age gap is too big is high is also another problem I had, meeting them got rid of it though. If you're just looking for a fling it's different, but a relationship it's not very easy. And yes it really is great. I would do it again in a heartbeat.
CptObvious Posted September 28, 2012 Posted September 28, 2012 I know most girls will put 'any races' to appear as 'open minded' but they actually don't do that. Nah, I'm pretty sure they do that so they don't accidentally disqualify an asian billionaire.
Author kaylan Posted September 28, 2012 Author Posted September 28, 2012 Mine used to be 18-38 but I switched to 20-30 because I kept getting messaged by really young girls and cuckold women. On POF I don't have an age range.hahaha whyd you put 18 if you didnt want young girls messaging you? And what do you mean by cuckold women? I thought that was a term for men. I guess not having an age range might work. Id like doing that better than lying about my preferred range. I could not have an age range listed, and simply say in my profile that Im open to women my age, and older women as well. 46 sounds a little old. That is 20 years older. How about 21-36? I dont mind the gap though.
MrCastle Posted September 28, 2012 Posted September 28, 2012 Wow, interesting. I'm 24 and I put 21-26 as my parameters. Just because I feel older women might want to settle down or find a man with a career
Author kaylan Posted September 28, 2012 Author Posted September 28, 2012 ^Castle...well lets consider the fact that some older women have already done the settling done thing and now simply want to enjoy dating again. Not all of them are single gals who have never experience that. Hell, some women dont even want to do all that depending on where they are in life. Good luck. I tried for a bit when I did OLD and nothing at 23 I found anyone over about 27 wasn't interested. I'm assuming because they think with the age gap it won't work and you'll seem immature. It's not something that's easy, and if your age is said too soon it will ruin it. I got lucky getting to know her quite a bit before she found out my age, and by then it wasn't a big deal to her. But the pressure from family and friends that the age gap is too big is high is also another problem I had, meeting them got rid of it though. If you're just looking for a fling it's different, but a relationship it's not very easy. And yes it really is great. I would do it again in a heartbeat. In reality I will end up in something long term with a woman closer to my age, but its not out of the question that I enjoy a relationship with someone considerably older. Life is to be experienced...and Im very intrigued at the prospect of dating an older woman. From what I used to see on profiles, they were quite a few older gals who were definitely open to younger guys.
spiderowl Posted September 28, 2012 Posted September 28, 2012 Put what you like but you should make it clear to any women you plan to date only 'for a while' know that. Young guys want the experience of dating an older woman but not many older women are just looking for an 'experience'. They are usually looking for something meaningful. As an older woman, I've been approached by a lot of young guys (it hapens on dating sites) and I found it really annoying that these guys were looking for an experience as if I was an alien species they fancied trying for a while. Most older women are wise to young studs seeking a bit of 'mature fun' and you might not get the welcome you anticipate from them. 2
Author kaylan Posted September 28, 2012 Author Posted September 28, 2012 ^ I get what youre saying. However, when it comes to dating with larger age gaps, I think both sexes tend to know that its usually short term due to being at different stages of life...or other compatibility factors. I was actually surprised last year by the amount of women only who were open to dating younger guys. And by older I mean women 6 or more years older than their lowest age range.
ThaWholigan Posted September 28, 2012 Posted September 28, 2012 hahaha whyd you put 18 if you didnt want young girls messaging you? And what do you mean by cuckold women? I thought that was a term for men. I guess not having an age range might work. Id like doing that better than lying about my preferred range. I could not have an age range listed, and simply say in my profile that Im open to women my age, and older women as well. I dont mind the gap though. It was set up a long time ago when I was 19, when I came back to the same profile years later, it was still like that and I never changed it. After some time online, I got messaged by quite a few of them. Incidentally, the girl I slept with was 19 (20 now). As for cuckold - I mean women who have cuckold SOs, i.e. they want me to f**k them while their man watches. Not my thing at all .
Author kaylan Posted September 28, 2012 Author Posted September 28, 2012 ^Husband watching? 0.o Mad weird bro lol
ThaWholigan Posted September 28, 2012 Posted September 28, 2012 ^Husband watching? 0.o Mad weird bro lol It was mostly white women in their 30s who wanted to sex a black guy specifically. Yeah, I was not interested at all - not creeped out, but just surprised.
Author kaylan Posted September 28, 2012 Author Posted September 28, 2012 ^I thought that was the case. Ive seen amatuer videos of that online. Not my bag really. For one I dont wanna be watched by some guy while Im having sex. Secondly, I dont sleep with taken women. And lastly, Im not thrilled about being someones racial fetish...especially if they are married.
suladas Posted September 28, 2012 Posted September 28, 2012 ^ I get what youre saying. However, when it comes to dating with larger age gaps, I think both sexes tend to know that its usually short term due to being at different stages of life...or other compatibility factors. I was actually surprised last year by the amount of women only who were open to dating younger guys. And by older I mean women 6 or more years older than their lowest age range. Why would you assume that? There is plenty of cases were it can work out, so you do need to make your intentions made early. Even 10 years isn't that big of deal. For the most part if you want to attract older women, you need to be quite mature for your age though so as to not be in completely different worlds and be able to relate to each other. I'm sure some do the short term thing to feel younger and are more ok with doing the younger thing though.
Author kaylan Posted September 28, 2012 Author Posted September 28, 2012 ^I assume that because in most cases it doesnt work out. Generally those relationships are much more prone to being flings. Reasons include: - Difference in maturity levels - One person wants kids, the other one doesnt or already has some - One person not being able to keep up with the other - One person not being able to slow down and just chill like the other - Knowing that in the future you may still be young and able bodied, while having to take care of someone elderly. And there are other reasons too. We have to be realistic about the issues age gaps can present to relationships. And Ill never be mature for any age I am. Im always a goofy kid at heart haha
suladas Posted September 28, 2012 Posted September 28, 2012 ^I assume that because in most cases it doesnt work out. Generally those relationships are much more prone to being flings. Reasons include: - Difference in maturity levels - One person wants kids, the other one doesnt or already has some - One person not being able to keep up with the other - One person not being able to slow down and just chill like the other - Knowing that in the future you may still be young and able bodied, while having to take care of someone elderly. And there are other reasons too. We have to be realistic about the issues age gaps can present to relationships. And Ill never be mature for any age I am. Im always a goofy kid at heart haha Speaking from mine of 23 and 35, the maturity level was actually very close, keeping up with each other again not an issue, and same with slowing down and taking time to relax. We were both on the same page with all that stuff. I hate clubs and that stuff, and if you date someone older you should most likely expect they won't want to go to them either. I spent some friday/saturday nights going for a walk with her and her kids or a movie, so yea for a lot of people in their mid 20's it's not going to be for them. It depends on the gap, but I mean someone young could have something happen where they need to be taken care of, or really you could both end up still nearly on the same page all you life, you see plenty of people at 70 still working normal jobs and stuff, age doesn't have to slow you down. Kids are definitely an issue with it, and by far the biggest issue to me. But for short term, most things shouldn't matter. It should just be enjoying each others company once in a while and sex. You shouldn't be meeting the kids IMO or anything like that. 1
suladas Posted September 28, 2012 Posted September 28, 2012 The thing I find odd is why older man younger women are so accepted and so common, yet the other way around isn't. Not to many people accept that a older women and younger man could last. 1
Author kaylan Posted September 28, 2012 Author Posted September 28, 2012 The thing I find odd is why older man younger women are so accepted and so common, yet the other way around isn't. Not to many people accept that a older women and younger man could last. Because society exists on a mountain of double standards that places a mans wants, needs, and desires above that of a womans. Also, because men control society, the feelings and thoughts of men get pushed into everyones heads from a young age. In which case you have women being attracted to younger men, but feeling like it isnt right because of stupid crap society taught them. You have ladies feeling weird even if the guy is great from them, all because hes even just a year younger. Old dudes (mostly white too) control society for the most part. If you look at a lot of things around us, its easy to see why certain norms exist the way they do. 1
monkey00 Posted September 28, 2012 Posted September 28, 2012 I still have no idea what you want to test drive older women. I have older female friends and single older female co-workers and I want nothing to do with them romantically or physically. I'm only attracted to women my age or younger. And the oldest I've ever dated have been my age. Although in the past I have hit on older women unknowingly...but hey what can I say, some just age well. It's quite possible to date someone your age or younger who's as mature as you if not more-so, it just depends what social circles you run with. I only have one friend I know who prefers an older woman as a mate because he wants to be taken care of and play the passive role.
FitChick Posted September 28, 2012 Posted September 28, 2012 It's becoming more acceptable for older women to date and even marry younger men. These things take time to become accepted. It wasn't too long ago that a black man couldn't date a white woman without risking death. I remember when this marriage was announced. Sadly, Gina decided to call it off because of all the publicity. Definitely true love, though. I hope they are still together.
suladas Posted September 28, 2012 Posted September 28, 2012 That is a little weird I must say. But if it works good for them.
sweet2th Posted September 28, 2012 Posted September 28, 2012 This is a common phenomonon. I'm 46 and got approached by a fair number of younger men. Everytime I signed up on Match.com...I would have one or two very aggressive twenty something year olds after me. They just want a pure sexual relationship...it is like a fetish for them. A fantasy. Sometimes I played along texting back and forth, but never took them up on it. I was tempted, yes. Kind of a sexual fetish for me too to put my hands on a young bod. But I never did it as I have too much self respect. You tend to feel like an object only. Plus, the ones who contacted me were too darn aggressive. Just be careful with feelings is all I ask.
veggirl Posted September 28, 2012 Posted September 28, 2012 Kaylan! 46? lol what? You are funny. Do you actually want to DATE a 40something woman? Or is it a more sexual thing? (which is fine, I am just curious). Can you leave the age range empty, or just do a bottom # and leave the highest # empty? I think 46 sounds kinda crazy, I think the highest you should list is 40 and tbh I feel that is pushing it. I'd think a range of like 22-32 would be more appropriate. I am REALLY curious about your interest in women 35+? If it's a sexual thing, just msg the women who are older and wouldn't see you in their search parameters.
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