robaday Posted September 27, 2012 Posted September 27, 2012 Im just wondering, kinda like a poll here, how many of you have heard from a dumper again and how long it normally takes? In my case, every girl who has broken up with me has always got back in touch, normally within the first two months. However, in this case I feel its different, as in shes cut all ties. Im not hoping for contact. Right now, its been a month and Im feeling better with every day that goes by. I have a fwb thing planned for next fri, and am going out more talking to more people. But Im wondering about other people. Has anyone ever cut you out and then made contact?
KatZee Posted September 28, 2012 Posted September 28, 2012 Im just wondering, kinda like a poll here, how many of you have heard from a dumper again and how long it normally takes? In my case, every girl who has broken up with me has always got back in touch, normally within the first two months. However, in this case I feel its different, as in shes cut all ties. Im not hoping for contact. Right now, its been a month and Im feeling better with every day that goes by. I have a fwb thing planned for next fri, and am going out more talking to more people. But Im wondering about other people. Has anyone ever cut you out and then made contact? I've only been dumped twice now, and the first guy that dumped me, my first love, he did reach out about a year after we stopped contact. My most recent ex, I tore his a.sshole so wide open, I'd pass out in shock if he ever tried to reach out.
geegirl Posted September 28, 2012 Posted September 28, 2012 Yes, they've all come back. Believe out of curiosity, ego stroke, no prospects or sex. The ex-husband came back a few years after the divorce. Seemed sincere but I was skeptical that it was maybe because there was nothing out there for him.
CptSaveAho Posted September 28, 2012 Posted September 28, 2012 Do people not "read" the bs they spew Im not hoping for contact but title of thread Do they always get back in touch? Really? This is hope to me, your ex cuts you off then you send her a request not to contact you then you create this thread. If there's an example of insanity... we have a winner here Lets perform a little magic trick.. I promise you, your whole world will change if you do this Find a mirror and chant "Mirror mirror on the wall... show me who's to blame for this fall "<now point at the person in the mirror> I hear therapy does wonders as well if you are one of those unfortunate people that doesnt happen to own a mirror I will put 100 dollars down that this one wont come back
witmadskilllz Posted September 28, 2012 Posted September 28, 2012 (edited) Bro, it happens all the time. Its way better in the long term if you just better improve yourself and self reflect more. That way, you'll be more than ready to find the next beautiful girlfriend whose going to be all crazy of the new you! The past is no more than just pain, so do yourself a favor and start NC !! Edited September 28, 2012 by witmadskilllz
Author robaday Posted September 28, 2012 Author Posted September 28, 2012 CptSaveAho, dude, yeah i am insane, of course, things been really crazy recently in my life, one ex gf has come and gone, another has come back into the fold. Ive calmed down and am slowly thinking clearly again, but yeah my posts are irrational because I have been going through some stuff recently. And because both ex's have come and gone and come back again, Im wondering if other people have had the same experience? Because seriously Im finding it unbelievable the first one is even talking to me again, let alone wanting to hang out. 1
Svet74 Posted September 28, 2012 Posted September 28, 2012 My most recent ex, I tore his a.sshole so wide open, I'd pass out in shock if he ever tried to reach out. Lol thats how i feel about my ex. My ex would contact me every 3 weeks. Only one time he made it 3 months of NC but then he ruined it again. And yes if i hear from him again i will blow up. Now its just getting annoying
suladas Posted September 28, 2012 Posted September 28, 2012 It's been 2 1/2 months and no, nothing yet. At one point it was 4 weeks and I broke NC, and now it's up to 3 again. However if there was a time she was going to break it, it would be soon. She's at a week vacation/friends wedding and is a bridesmaid. She went alone because I was suppose to go. So i'm pretty much positive the downtime will give her plenty of time to think and being at a wedding alone she will likely feel lonely. No idea if she will actually reach out and contact me though, but if it's going to happen it would definitely be the time. The weird thing is, as much as I want to talk to her, I don't know if I would want to go back to a relationship with her. But it sure would be nice to talk and put the past behind and go back to talking once in a while.
Svet74 Posted September 28, 2012 Posted September 28, 2012 It's been 2 1/2 months and no, nothing yet. At one point it was 4 weeks and I broke NC, and now it's up to 3 again. However if there was a time she was going to break it, it would be soon. She's at a week vacation/friends wedding and is a bridesmaid. She went alone because I was suppose to go. So i'm pretty much positive the downtime will give her plenty of time to think and being at a wedding alone she will likely feel lonely. The weird thing is, as much as I want to talk to her, I don't know if I would want to go back to a relationship with her. But it sure would be nice to talk and put the past behind and go back to talking once in a while. usually they will make contact at 3 weeks or 3 month. but if shes a good person and has no intentions of being with you she will prob not break nc now i respect that 1
suladas Posted September 28, 2012 Posted September 28, 2012 usually they will make contact at 3 weeks or 3 month. but if shes a good person and has no intentions of being with you she will prob not break nc now i respect that Ya it's tough to say. I fully believe she is doing NC now because she wants to be with me, but has convinced herself it's not a good idea, mostly to protect me, but partly to protect herself to. I don't know. The first text I sent after the BU she responded with "i'll think about it" so it wasn't completely NC since the BU. I really just wish she would state her intentions. Being next door neighbors in a duplex it's a bit of a different situation. Because there is still times we have to talk to each other. We've both just been avoiding it.
Sugarkane Posted September 28, 2012 Posted September 28, 2012 I've been in NC since day 1, for about 2 years. I haven't been contacted once
I'm nuts Posted September 28, 2012 Posted September 28, 2012 I'm not lucky enough to have a list of exs I'm waiting to hear from I do know one girl who I deleted of skype not because we fell out, but it was time for her to move on, then lo and behold 1 month later a new person (girl) is on my contact list without making a contact request but has just appeared on my friend list, I only have 4, the name is new but the country is the same, most odd as no one had added me on skype for years, then this, 1 month after deleting her This 'new' contact has yet to make any contact, but I'm sure it is her checking on me to see if I add any new girls to take her place
KansasChica Posted September 28, 2012 Posted September 28, 2012 My ex told me he loved me every day- told me how he wanted to marry me and share a future together. Then, he ended it and has never reached out. Sure, we share mutual friends and I see him from time to time; yet, in 10 months, has never once initiated any communication with me. He just doesn't care what happens in my life it seems. Now, if I see him out, we just ignore each other. I really have nothing to say to him- "hey, since I wasn't good enough for you, how are those other girls treating you?" No thanks.
Svet74 Posted September 28, 2012 Posted September 28, 2012 Ya it's tough to say. I fully believe she is doing NC now because she wants to be with me, but has convinced herself it's not a good idea, mostly to protect me, but partly to protect herself to. I don't know. The first text I sent after the BU she responded with "i'll think about it" so it wasn't completely NC since the BU. I really just wish she would state her intentions. Being next door neighbors in a duplex it's a bit of a different situation. Because there is still times we have to talk to each other. We've both just been avoiding it. I see my ex at church so i know what you mean. its still NC though if you guys are not talking to each other. my ex owes me money so im waiting for a call from him so he can finally return it. then he will never hear from me again
mike588 Posted September 28, 2012 Posted September 28, 2012 Im just wondering, kinda like a poll here, how many of you have heard from a dumper again and how long it normally takes? In my case, every girl who has broken up with me has always got back in touch, normally within the first two months. However, in this case I feel its different, as in shes cut all ties. Im not hoping for contact. Right now, its been a month and Im feeling better with every day that goes by. I have a fwb thing planned for next fri, and am going out more talking to more people. But Im wondering about other people. Has anyone ever cut you out and then made contact? My ex. g/f dumped me in a very cruel way for her ex. b/f 1 year ago after we dated for a year.. I thought I'd never hear from her again but right at the 6 month mark she contacts me several times (e-mails) saying how sorry she was for hurting me...she regrets it blah blah blah. Also my ex. wife and I were divorced(she split) many many years ago and last year she contacted me...just 2 weeks ago she contacts me again wanting to come over and said she misses me. I'm not getting back with either!! 1
suladas Posted September 28, 2012 Posted September 28, 2012 Do go actually believe what you wrote or is this wishful thinking? Really? Her intentions are CRYSTAL CLEAR. I mostly believe it, because before we broke up, she told me a few times that based on the age difference and kids thing that I should find someone with less baggage and all that stuff, she felt guilty about it and that she was starting to get really strong feelings for me. I don't know if that is why she is ignoring me now or not. That's why I said her intentions aren't clear. If that's why she's ignoring me, it would be nice to know. If it's because she doesn't want to be with me i'd really like to know because then it would be easier to move on. I guess that's what I meant. If she never said the "ill think about it" it would of been much clearer. But that response changed it a lot. Because any other time she just flat out didn't reply it was never a response to get me to leave her alone, so it did seem genuine. She was always straightforward to, never beat around the truth or told me something I wanted to hear.
JayL Posted September 28, 2012 Posted September 28, 2012 (edited) Im just wondering, kinda like a poll here, how many of you have heard from a dumper again and how long it normally takes? In my case, every girl who has broken up with me has always got back in touch, normally within the first two months. However, in this case I feel its different, as in shes cut all ties. Im not hoping for contact. Right now, its been a month and Im feeling better with every day that goes by. I have a fwb thing planned for next fri, and am going out more talking to more people. But Im wondering about other people. Has anyone ever cut you out and then made contact? It really depends... I've always been a relationship type of man. The first one, I dumped her, she attempted getting back with me almost every month. Her and I were together for 3.5 years. Reason : The feelings faded on my end and I was honest to her about it. The second one, she dumped me, she found out I started seeing someone else and attempted to get me back. Her last message was last year and I ignored it. Reason : She changed, started drinking and clubbing every single weekend, grind with this guy, grind with that guy etc. I got sick of it we kept arguing and she broke up with me because she wanted to enjoy life and she's young. The third one, I dumped her, she attempted to get me back for months until she gave up. Reason : I've attempted to find that connection for a year and I just couldn't find it. I do miss her as she's an amazing girl, but it just won't work out and she deserves better. The fourth one, who had a mutual break up with me 3 weeks ago does NOT give a sh*t at all. The exact reason why we broke up. She's so materialistic that I felt that I was being treated like one of her accessories. She admitted that she never felt anything for me, that the attraction and spark was there within the first week or two but slowly died when her and I started heading towards the more serious path. She kept me around saying she wanted to see if she could find that connection with me and build emotions as she loved my qualities, but I felt neglected the entire time, that I'm her last option when her friends are busy with something/someone else. I loved her and I still somewhat do. Every week, I have attempted getting back with her by messaging her at least one day per week, no response, until yesterday, I messaged her again, she responded just to blow me off and told me to basically F OFF FOREVER. Out of all the women I've dated, the last one I dated was the most F'd up one in the head. Edited September 28, 2012 by JayL
Sugarkane Posted September 29, 2012 Posted September 29, 2012 No offemce but this qution makes me laugh. 2+ years dumped cruelly with no answers. I haven't been contacted to this day.
NoMoreJerks Posted September 29, 2012 Posted September 29, 2012 It really depends... I've always been a relationship type of man. The first one, I dumped her, she attempted getting back with me almost every month. Her and I were together for 3.5 years. Reason : The feelings faded on my end and I was honest to her about it. The second one, she dumped me, she found out I started seeing someone else and attempted to get me back. Her last message was last year and I ignored it. Reason : She changed, started drinking and clubbing every single weekend, grind with this guy, grind with that guy etc. I got sick of it we kept arguing and she broke up with me because she wanted to enjoy life and she's young. The third one, I dumped her, she attempted to get me back for months until she gave up. Reason : I've attempted to find that connection for a year and I just couldn't find it. I do miss her as she's an amazing girl, but it just won't work out and she deserves better. The fourth one, who had a mutual break up with me 3 weeks ago does NOT give a sh*t at all. The exact reason why we broke up. She's so materialistic that I felt that I was being treated like one of her accessories. She admitted that she never felt anything for me, that the attraction and spark was there within the first week or two but slowly died when her and I started heading towards the more serious path. She kept me around saying she wanted to see if she could find that connection with me and build emotions as she loved my qualities, but I felt neglected the entire time, that I'm her last option when her friends are busy with something/someone else. I loved her and I still somewhat do. Every week, I have attempted getting back with her by messaging her at least one day per week, no response, until yesterday, I messaged her again, she responded just to blow me off and told me to basically F OFF FOREVER. Out of all the women I've dated, the last one I dated was the most F'd up one in the head. Wow.. that's some impressive record there... Hi from Quebec, btw.
JayL Posted September 29, 2012 Posted September 29, 2012 Wow.. that's some impressive record there... Hi from Quebec, btw. How is that impressive? I've really only been in relationships with 4 women, although I did date around at some point but no real relationship.
Ajax Posted September 29, 2012 Posted September 29, 2012 No offemce but this qution makes me laugh. 2+ years dumped cruelly with no answers. I haven't been contacted to this day. Ditto. I don't think there's a real answer for your question. Some will contact you, some won't. Some of my exes have stayed in contact with me, and I still catch up with them two or three times a year. Some I've never heard from. When I came to LoveShack two years ago I was heartbroken by a girl who I though I would eventually marry. When she left I told her that I wouldn't bother her but if and when she wanted to talk again I'd be here. Two years later, I still haven't heard from her. I wasted too much time worrying and hoping to hear from her. It's really best to try to put it out of your mind and move on.
I'm nuts Posted September 29, 2012 Posted September 29, 2012 I'm not lucky enough to have a list of exs I'm waiting to hear from I do know one girl who I deleted of skype not because we fell out, but it was time for her to move on, then lo and behold 1 month later a new person (girl) is on my contact list without making a contact request but has just appeared on my friend list, I only have 4, the name is new but the country is the same, most odd as no one had added me on skype for years, then this, 1 month after deleting her This 'new' contact has yet to make any contact, but I'm sure it is her checking on me to see if I add any new girls to take her place I've just heard from this girl again this morning, an email wishing me a happy mid autumn for Sunday, that's twice now in a month, my birthday and now this I told her we shouldn't keep contact now she is engaged, I think she must still miss me and much as I miss her Grrrrrr. I made no attempt to contact her, but she has now contacted me twice, we did know each other over 6 years though and never fight.
edelveis Posted September 29, 2012 Posted September 29, 2012 i think yes,she contacted me 5 months after the break up with absolutely no contact during that period..
Recommended Posts