jordancatalano Posted September 27, 2012 Posted September 27, 2012 I've been dating this guy for almost two months. He asked to go out all the time in the beginning, but for the past two weeks he hadn't asked to see me but yet he was still going out with his friends on the weekend. I spoke to him about it and asked him what was going on because he had been acting different. He said nothing is going on and that he still calls and texts me everyday. I said ok and didn't push it. The next day he texts me and we are texting back and forth. Eventually I ask him what he doing over the weekend he never texted me back. The next day I sent him a text telling him that I don't think he is interested in dating me anymore so I think we should stop. He didn't answer my text for two days. He eventually calls me but I didn't answer the phone. Later that night I call him and I left a message telling him to call me back. It's been two weeks and he still as called back. I have been thinking that maybe I was too harsh because he is broke right now, so maybe that was getting to him. But then again it was not like we went on extravagant dates anyway. Most of the dates we went on were free or low cost and I never pressured him to take me on expensive dates because I knew he couldn't afford it. I didn't mind because I knew he was really was broke and it's not like he was just a loser he has a professional degree he is just having a hard time in this economy. Should I give him another call or was I justified in my actions? I miss him so much.
MilitantPacifist Posted September 27, 2012 Posted September 27, 2012 Speaking as someone else who is currently broke through no fault of my own, and currently dating, I can tell you that unless his phone's been shut off there's no reason why he shouldn't at least hit you back. But on the other hand, he may just be too busy trying to find jobs, and surviving day-to-day, to devote much time to dating at the moment. I know that's the case for me. So basically, he made a little mistake not getting back to you quickly. But, is it worth just discarding him? Probably not. He's having a rough time, give him a break. If he's dodging you asking for dates (asking what someone "is doing this weekend" is effectively a woman asking to go on a date) then he's probably embarrassed and insecure about the fact that he has no money to spend on you. If you really want him, reassure him that money doesn't matter to you and you're into him for him. Let him know you understand what he's going through and are willing to wait a bit while he gets his act together. So yeah, you overreacted to a pretty small offense. I'd say give the dude another try.
Author jordancatalano Posted September 27, 2012 Author Posted September 27, 2012 Thanks for the response. I want to contact him and let him know I miss him but I'm afraid of being rejected. It's been almost two weeks he might be dating someone else who knows. I also have to mention that he took my virginity right before this all happened. So this may have contributed to my overreaction.
yongyong Posted September 27, 2012 Posted September 27, 2012 Well I was going to ask you 'did you give it to him' and I read your replies. it's just obvious. you should probably know why but just want to see the different answer that might give you a hope? Anyways he sounds like a Alpha Bum (guys with no money but manages to sleep around. don't spend sxit on women and even makes women pay for it. I have a respect for this guy) Is he a hipster?
Author jordancatalano Posted September 27, 2012 Author Posted September 27, 2012 He's not a hipster. He's a lawyer. He never asked me to pay for anything and he was never disrespectful. I don't know why he acted the way he did, but I don't believe it was all about the sex. Of course I could be wrong.
Author jordancatalano Posted September 27, 2012 Author Posted September 27, 2012 He put effort into courting me.
TG1 Posted September 28, 2012 Posted September 28, 2012 Speaking as someone else who is currently broke through no fault of my own, and currently dating, I can tell you that unless his phone's been shut off there's no reason why he shouldn't at least hit you back. But on the other hand, he may just be too busy trying to find jobs, and surviving day-to-day, to devote much time to dating at the moment. I know that's the case for me. So basically, he made a little mistake not getting back to you quickly. But, is it worth just discarding him? Probably not. He's having a rough time, give him a break. If he's dodging you asking for dates (asking what someone "is doing this weekend" is effectively a woman asking to go on a date) then he's probably embarrassed and insecure about the fact that he has no money to spend on you. If you really want him, reassure him that money doesn't matter to you and you're into him for him. Let him know you understand what he's going through and are willing to wait a bit while he gets his act together. So yeah, you overreacted to a pretty small offense. I'd say give the dude another try. Yes I say give him another try too before you regret it seriously and believe me you will if you pass him up
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