Why is the ex looking at my profile on Match??

[Rosa Tamora]

Just broke up with the guy on Sept 11th. Was together for a lil over a year, it's been a roller coaster with this guy. First says he wants kids, then doesn't, then wants to get married one day, then doesn't, breaks up with me then wants to get back. Talks to me about buying a house but won't commit. I made it pretty clear I will only purchase a house with someone I am going to marry. Finally in September he pulled the whole "I'm not sure if we should renew the lease and continue this..I don't find this exciting anymore." I decided I had enough, gave my notice and found a new place to live in 2 days.

2 weeks after we break up I am out and in my fresh new apartment. That was pretty painful, especially since some of his reasons for breaking up were idiotic:

 

1. "You don't drink or cannot tolerate drinks well" (i'm a lightweight). So what? My body just can't handle it so I know when to stop. But I've never stopped him from drinking. When he got sick and was puking all over the place on NYE, I looked after him.

 

2. Apparently I don't pedal my bike fast enough. (no, really, he said this)

 

THEN, tonight, I saw that he checked out my profile on Match.com.

 

What is up with that? Doesn't the idiot know I can see who has viewed me?

sheesh.

[I'm nuts]

Pretty normal behaviour checking up on someone, keeping a eye on you, you should be flattered.

[Minka333]

Give yourself a huge pat for freeing yourself from that indecisive jerk. He checked your profile coz' like an immature little boy he was curious about what you're up to. So just enjoy your newfound freedom and don't look back.

[flitzanu]

or, why do you not have him blocked from every social media site and dating site that you possible can, in order to avoid him seeing your profile?

[Rosa Tamora]

Yeah I think I'll work on blocking him this weekend. I don't have him on any other social site ...

 

Just annoying. Why would he check out my profile. It's not like he doesn't know what I'm about. Just go away already.

 

Silly boy. Monday asks me if I want to think about moving to the Midwest with him for a job out there in the next 2 years. I tell him I'm not excited about it because I don't know anything about the midwest plus I have a great job here and good friends. Moving out there means I have to start from scratch, with someone who has broken up with me twice already. Then next day breaks up with me citing all those reasons and says I'm not "spontaneous" about moving to another state.

Pfft. I left my home COUNTRY and family behind to come study and work in the USA, didn't know anyone in the country. I'll tell you about spontaneous. He has never even left the country or done anything like that.

[LuckyLady13]

Rosa, good move on your part! This guy isn't nearly mature enough and on the same page as you, dear.

 

Why is he looking at your profile? Well, he's immature! He's peeking to see if you've got someone else and wants to know what you're doing. Might take him a while to get it into his head that you're really not interested anymore.

[Rosa Tamora]

Number of my friends think the same thing too, that he is checking up on me and wondering how come I'm not wallowing in misery.

I live right across the street! If you want to talk to me he knows where to reach me, but nooo....have to creep around like that.

 

This guy is a piece of work. Wants to buy a house with me, wants me to move with him but with no real commitment. Never came to my own birthday party (really, he didn't) that my friends threw for me, never came out to the social functions I had with my friends, didn't want to meet my uncle and aunt who flew in from my country to visit. Then starts sounding pissy when i hesitate about moving to god knows where with him.

Gives me the whole same spiel "I don;t know how I feel about this anymore. I'm not excited bla bla bla". He said the same thing in July, then tried to get back with me 2 days after breaking up with me. I gave it another shot and then in Sept he pulls out the same line again. Then tells me "I don't like to compromise much"...

 

Well, good luck with that one buddy. Relationships are about compromise because no 2 people are exactly alike. LOL!!!

[beyond]

Just broke up with the guy on Sept 11th. Was together for a lil over a year, it's been a roller coaster with this guy. First says he wants kids, then doesn't, then wants to get married one day, then doesn't, breaks up with me then wants to get back. Talks to me about buying a house but won't commit. I made it pretty clear I will only purchase a house with someone I am going to marry. Finally in September he pulled the whole "I'm not sure if we should renew the lease and continue this..I don't find this exciting anymore." I decided I had enough, gave my notice and found a new place to live in 2 days.

2 weeks after we break up I am out and in my fresh new apartment. That was pretty painful, especially since some of his reasons for breaking up were idiotic:

 

1. "You don't drink or cannot tolerate drinks well" (i'm a lightweight). So what? My body just can't handle it so I know when to stop. But I've never stopped him from drinking. When he got sick and was puking all over the place on NYE, I looked after him.

 

2. Apparently I don't pedal my bike fast enough. (no, really, he said this)

 

THEN, tonight, I saw that he checked out my profile on Match.com.

 

What is up with that? Doesn't the idiot know I can see who has viewed me?

sheesh.

 

Of course those two things aren't the reasons he broke up with you.

 

He said he doesn't find things exciting anymore, doesn't want to live with you, get married to you or have children with you - all things that you want .

 

You should be running so fast in the opposite direction from him!

 

Just be glad he said this now and not when you are married and expecting his baby!

 

That's great that you have moved into a new apartment.

 

Stop worrying about what he is doing and if he has checked out your profile - jeeez, why are you even on a dating site??? Get off it! Go out with friends, met new people, play music, re arrange the furniture in your apartment, cook up a storm - whatever, just enjoy.

 

xx

[Sugarkane]

Can completely relate to the ridiculious explanations. I hope you block this guy and never get back with him!

[Rosa Tamora]

Of course those two things aren't the reasons he broke up with you.

 

He said he doesn't find things exciting anymore, doesn't want to live with you, get married to you or have children with you - all things that you want .

 

You should be running so fast in the opposite direction from him!

 

Just be glad he said this now and not when you are married and expecting his baby!

 

That's great that you have moved into a new apartment.

 

Stop worrying about what he is doing and if he has checked out your profile - jeeez, why are you even on a dating site??? Get off it! Go out with friends, met new people, play music, re arrange the furniture in your apartment, cook up a storm - whatever, just enjoy.

 

xx

 

You're totally right! I was kinda mad when I saw he looked at my profile then had a laughed when I realized he probably saw mine and thought "whoa she's getting back in the saddle again so fast? Not crying over me?"

 

I'm on that site to do exactly that: meet new people. I am not intending to get serious with anyone, no way! But I do plan on having fun...all the fun I've missed out on in the past 1.5 months.

 

My new apartment is lovely. Top floor residence. I really love having this drama free space where I don't feel like I'm walking on eggshells, don't have to listen to his negativity. Soon I'm gonna think of getting a doggy from the Humane Society. It's really true that when you KNOW you gave your 100% in the relationship, you can walk away knowing you did do your best and that if it doesn't work out, you know it's not you, it's him and his silly reasons. And knowing that, feels good.

[Rosa Tamora]

Can completely relate to the ridiculious explanations. I hope you block this guy and never get back with him!

 

I will never get back with him. EVER.

[TaraMaiden]

Awwww...sweet. I hear wedding bells!! (That was a joke..... )

 

Block him, blank him, don't even look in his direction... Don't give him the time of year, let alone day... And this sounds ridiculous, but - put a spring in your step, make sure you stand tall, and throw you head back and chin out (You get the picture, I've made you sound like a pelican....!) but oooze confidence from every pore.

When he sees you, let him see just what he's lost.

 

For good.

[Rosa Tamora]

Awwww...sweet. I hear wedding bells!! (That was a joke..... )

 

Block him, blank him, don't even look in his direction... Don't give him the time of year, let alone day... And this sounds ridiculous, but - put a spring in your step, make sure you stand tall, and throw you head back and chin out (You get the picture, I've made you sound like a pelican....!) but oooze confidence from every pore.

When he sees you, let him see just what he's lost.

 

For good.

 

I will. Thank you! I feel good that I'm not on that roller coaster anymore. Up and down...up and down...such garbage.

[beyond]

You're totally right! I was kinda mad when I saw he looked at my profile then had a laughed when I realized he probably saw mine and thought "whoa she's getting back in the saddle again so fast? Not crying over me?"

 

I'm on that site to do exactly that: meet new people. I am not intending to get serious with anyone, no way! But I do plan on having fun...all the fun I've missed out on in the past 1.5 months.

 

My new apartment is lovely. Top floor residence. I really love having this drama free space where I don't feel like I'm walking on eggshells, don't have to listen to his negativity. Soon I'm gonna think of getting a doggy from the Humane Society. It's really true that when you KNOW you gave your 100% in the relationship, you can walk away knowing you did do your best and that if it doesn't work out, you know it's not you, it's him and his silly reasons. And knowing that, feels good.

 

You can do all that - meet new people, have fun, without going on a dating site!