outsider11 Posted September 25, 2012 Posted September 25, 2012 it's a little long but I really need some help about this so I try to explain the situation for you: we had a very deep relationship for about 4 months , i know it's not that much but it was very deep and we even talked about marriage in a serious level. I should add we are living in two separate cities and we're too far from each other. I used to go to her city and we get a room and hang out with each other for some days then I'd came back home. those days were very short but extremely memorable for both of us. after 4 months on an phone argument she suddenly mentioned she needs to break up and she can't take it any longer, I begged and even cried because I couldnt believe it and I was shocked because we were just at the hype of our love, but the answer was no. after that I tried not to call but I text her at nights and some chat at office and after 1 week she called and came back she said she couldn't just leave. But this happened again after 2 weeks she said to me her work at office is too much these days and makes her extremely tired that she can't manage a distanced relationship and apart from that she loves me too much but this distance between us has made this relationship so hard for her and she can't just take this all, she needs to quit though she loves me. This time I decided to fly to her city to sort things out. so after 3 days I flied all the long wayand I was there I called her phone at the time I knew she is ending his job and told her I'm in town and want to see her. she was extremely happy and excited but at the dinner she mentioned that she is still at his word and wants to break up. I was there for about 4 days , I met her every night but seemed that it's just getting worst and I can't fix anything (at last days she didnt even wanted to see me so much) so I came back home. when I reached home I started NC and after what i was experieneced I used to tell to myself that she won't came back anymore , it was extremely hard for me , but at the day 7 at NC she called me and said that she's missing me so much that she can't take it anymore. I was so happy but i didn't show that so much and I told her that i was so upset with her and what she had done. anyway she started to call me since then she called every 2 days and sometimes everyday but i didn't call. I answered her calls but i didn't call myself. She still wouldnt tell me that she wants to be in realationship or not she just told she can't let this relationship go and she needs time to find herself and she wanted me to give her time to decide.she also added that she doesn't want to be a fool like the past and make a weak decision to break it after 2 weeks , she wants to make the last steady decision. this situation lasted for about 20 days until I felt i got connected to her again I began to miss her so much and I began to call her. and now I've become deeply sensative on her I've realized i'm waiting most of my time for her to call me and when she doesn't i get very depressed i can't help myself not to think of her and I sometimes feel i'm going to miss her forever. this is the situation she hasn't say a "No" nor "Yes". and I'm worried most of the times about her and this is making me sometimes unable to act and think right. I don't know actually what's going on her mind, but I want her to be able to decide about this relationship and I really want her decision would be to stay with me(I have also told her that in case of marriage i can change my city and live with her, since she can't change her job). well these days are both very important and very hard for me . I want to act in a way so she feels she can lay on me and feels the great feeling towards me again and wants to come back, at the other hand I'm worried about what would happen and I'm missing her most of the time just willing to have a phone conversation.
kae Posted September 26, 2012 Posted September 26, 2012 i didnt read anything.. just your heading.. if you have doubts exit. make them work hard for you and that will be a telltale sign of their intent. it may just be a validation thing coming back. Beware.
Darren Steez Posted September 28, 2012 Posted September 28, 2012 My friend, it sounds like your girl has found another man but is keeping you on the sidelines as a back up. Look buddy, you seem like a nice guy, a nice dependable guy ready to fly out to see the woman you love and fix things, bravo buddy, that's love and class. I just don't buy her story, seems to me like she knows you and is stringing you along, why wait to see if things will "last", what she means is maybe she's having second thoughts about the man she's seeing, after all how many men will do such a noble thing as to fly out to see their girl? Guy's like you don't come around often in a girls life, she wants to have her cake and eat it. I'd move on because you're liable to get your heart broken again? You're starting to heal yourself and you're not so clingy, so she starts calling again and stringing you along. If she really loves you she won't use the BS lines about waiting to find herself blah blah blah. Either she commits or goodbye, she's gone. You deserve happiness and respect, and a woman that will give you 100% without any BS! Good luck 1
Author outsider11 Posted October 1, 2012 Author Posted October 1, 2012 If she really loves you she won't use the BS lines about waiting to find herself blah blah blah. Either she commits or goodbye, she's gone. You deserve happiness and respect, and a woman that will give you 100% without any BS! Good luck really nice to read your reply, so helpful. I can think like this but there's another thing in this situation which is the long distance between us. I can understand for her to think, the only and last solution for us to live together is marriage and it's not an easy decision to be taken, so I think that might be also the problem with her doubt since i don't have an stable financial situation at this time and it makes her decision harder.
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