RogerWallace111 Posted September 24, 2012 Posted September 24, 2012 So, went out Saturday night, ran into a lil bit older chick I know who has always been a bit flirtatious with me (though I never played into to an inappropriate level when I wasn't single). Honestly I don't find her that attractive, though many of my friends/guys I know do. Kind of the "I would be into it, but wouldn't actively seek it out" situation. Anyway, we ran into eachother, both drunk, so no seeking was necessary. After flirting, her starting to hang on me, and eventually whispering what she wanted me to do to her in my ear, I took her home, we f*cked three times, she gave me some crazy dome, etc. Woke up the next morning and walked her to her car. Wasn't even awkward, made out with her a couple times on the walk, went fine. Anyway, my feelings surrounding it are interesting to me and I felt like writing them out. Background is I'm recently out of a 3.5 year relationship, of which the final, short-lived attempt to make it work was 3 weeks ago. We'd gone 3 months nc before that "fling" so the final failure didn't hurt too badly and actually helped give me real closure. One thing on a physical level, is that as much as I often thought I was into "milfs" and older women (she's early 30s, i'm early 20s), I'm not sure I am. In fact the whole encounter left me hungry to f*ck a girl my own age asap. It made me feel like I should devote my time to girls I really want and not bother with "taking what I can get". That's not a profound statement, but I don't want another relationship too quickly, so there's no reason to deny that realistically I'm mostly out for casual fun/sex. I just want to be able to revisit the memories/images of the night before and go "daaamn that girl looked good and got me f*ckin goin", instead of "well, maybe I wasn't that down, but at least I got a few nuts off". It felt good, and wasn't a passionless experience by any means, but it just didn't make me go "whoa !" like it should. Ideally, real "love making" is the pinnacle of sexual experience. But as I'm trying not to fall in love too soon here, I'm basically looking for sex and some enjoyable company. I suppose all I've learned is that I should aim for girls I find particularly desirable. Not an amazing discovery but this was a helpful reminder... Plus, just as a first stepping-stone toward new women and away from my ex, it serves perfectly well. And a confidence booster of course hehe. After the first round she rolled over and said, catching her breath, "how can you not have a girlfriend ?" That was a nice compliment. The whole thing was a nice reminder that I can definitely please a female. She gave me her number, I said "we'll talk sometime soon", so I'm not really sure how to proceed. I wouldn't be against another encounter like that with her at some point, but I don't have the time to devote, and don't want to lead her on (though she likely doesn't care much anyway)... I figure I should send her some text acknowledgment within a day or two just to be cordial though. Hmmm.
youngnlove89 Posted September 24, 2012 Posted September 24, 2012 Makes me sad that this is what my ex bf is going to do also...f*ck another random woman that isn't me.
bluefairy812 Posted September 24, 2012 Posted September 24, 2012 Makes me sad that this is what my ex bf is going to do also...f*ck another random woman that isn't me. that makes 2 of us.
loveunlimited Posted September 24, 2012 Posted September 24, 2012 look upon it as fulfilling a mutual need. Let her know this is non exclusive, play it safe and tell her there's no commitment wanted or intended, just good raw fun. you're not looking for any form of relationship right now, so it's just a FWB situation.No? 1
Author RogerWallace111 Posted September 24, 2012 Author Posted September 24, 2012 Aw youngnlove try not sweat that sh*t too much. Though this last 10-day attempt to work things out with my ex gave me closure and left me barely caring, I felt the same about her through the 3 months of nc prior. Just think about how good you were and the uniqueness of what you offered sexually. 1
Author RogerWallace111 Posted September 24, 2012 Author Posted September 24, 2012 look upon it as fulfilling a mutual need. Let her know this is non exclusive, play it safe and tell her there's no commitment wanted or intended, just good raw fun. you're not looking for any form of relationship right now, so it's just a FWB situation.No? Yes yes. Proper advice. I'll proceed as so.
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