Zany90 Posted September 24, 2012 Posted September 24, 2012 Ok, just a little history... Me and my ex girlfriend broke up a long time ago, i mean maybe more than 9 months... and in that time it was almost 100% no contact with more recently maybe the *odd* like on facebook or tiny comment on facebook... I do blame myself for alot of the things that went wrong in the relationship, i was young and immature and was drinking alot and just basically being totally selfish.. however i really did love her and to be honest i still think about her at some point almost every day... anyway, i was at a party on saturday and someone happened to mention that she had cheated on me when she was seeing me, now bear in mind that this is a guy who left his girlfriend because he was convinced he loved my ex and she told him he didnt stand a chance... anyway i sent her (maybe shouldnt have but i did) a message on facebook describing what had been said, she sent me back alot of messages and worked out who it was who had told me.. i ended up saying "i obviously still have feelings for you because when i heard that i was gutted" ... within 2 minutes my house phone rang and she was crying and promised that she did not do anything and couldnt believe that id even have considered the idea.. i totally believe her she sounded 100% sincere... at the party also is someone who she tends to hang about with alot... when she was on the phone while she was crying she said "i was asking [person x] how you were when i heard you were out and sayin that i really missed you and people are going round saying that"... anyway this is dragging on a bit, the point is we talked for a couple of hours on the phone after that! had alot of great laughs, just a really enjoyable long conversation like the old days. she also said "youre so easy to talk to theres never any awkwardness with you", definitely got her laughing etc... now im not sure when to contact her again.. if i could i would pick up the phone right now and talk to her but i know being too full on will just push her away again.. any advice? btw parts of this might have made me sound a bit wimpy but i can assure you im not, i did 100% believe her over the other guy
BooBoo1982 Posted September 24, 2012 Posted September 24, 2012 Ok, just a little history... Me and my ex girlfriend broke up a long time ago, i mean maybe more than 9 months... and in that time it was almost 100% no contact with more recently maybe the *odd* like on facebook or tiny comment on facebook... I do blame myself for alot of the things that went wrong in the relationship, i was young and immature and was drinking alot and just basically being totally selfish.. however i really did love her and to be honest i still think about her at some point almost every day... anyway, i was at a party on saturday and someone happened to mention that she had cheated on me when she was seeing me, now bear in mind that this is a guy who left his girlfriend because he was convinced he loved my ex and she told him he didnt stand a chance... anyway i sent her (maybe shouldnt have but i did) a message on facebook describing what had been said, she sent me back alot of messages and worked out who it was who had told me.. i ended up saying "i obviously still have feelings for you because when i heard that i was gutted" ... within 2 minutes my house phone rang and she was crying and promised that she did not do anything and couldnt believe that id even have considered the idea.. i totally believe her she sounded 100% sincere... at the party also is someone who she tends to hang about with alot... when she was on the phone while she was crying she said "i was asking [person x] how you were when i heard you were out and sayin that i really missed you and people are going round saying that"... anyway this is dragging on a bit, the point is we talked for a couple of hours on the phone after that! had alot of great laughs, just a really enjoyable long conversation like the old days. she also said "youre so easy to talk to theres never any awkwardness with you", definitely got her laughing etc... now im not sure when to contact her again.. if i could i would pick up the phone right now and talk to her but i know being too full on will just push her away again.. any advice? btw parts of this might have made me sound a bit wimpy but i can assure you im not, i did 100% believe her over the other guy Who broke up with who?
Author Zany90 Posted September 24, 2012 Author Posted September 24, 2012 she broke up with me... like i say as embarassing as this is at the time i had quite a bad alcohol problem, there were numerous occassions id get black out drunk and just be a total ******* and my head just was not in the right place at all... i talked to her about it last night i said ive never really forgiven myself for it and that i was totally out of hand and just couldnt see the damage i was doing and was blaming everyone else (the stereotypical alcoholic), and she said listen i would never hold it against you i totally forgive you, i know addiction is a real thing and i could tell that underneath it all you just wanted to stop but couldnt, she said the one thing that would have made all teh difference to her would have been if i had have accepted responsibility but she felt it had got to the point i didnt even want to apologise any more because i just couldnt guarantee it wouldnt happen again.. she is right and i completely agreed with her on all of those things... last nights conversation was really like the old days we talked for a couple of hours and had a really good laugh, i said ive really missed talking to you and she said shes missed talking to me too.. but i dont want to push this... the bottom line is obviously i want her back but even besides that i just miss talking to her and having her in my life and i can say that i am a different person than i was... i was in my early 20s assing about and partying and just didnt realise what i had as shameful as that is, im now 25 and alot more mature and just realised how much of an idiot i was
Author Zany90 Posted September 24, 2012 Author Posted September 24, 2012 part of me really just wants to send a message telling her truthfully how much i miss her like hell and still love her - but i think i know better than to do this, this would probably just get her back up and make her say "This is why we cant talk" so im thinking probably the best course of action is just to be friendly and hope that more frequent conversation develops... then after a while maybe ask her if she wants to meet for coffee or something but i just dont know if she would go for it i really miss her like i cant describe
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