lawlessloveless Posted September 24, 2012 Posted September 24, 2012 My ex and I got to talking one night and we both had unresolved feelings. We decided on giving it another chance and things have been better than ever. There were things that had happened between us when we broke up that were still never discussed and I think we understand the need for communication now (we failed at it lol). Problem is...he talked to another woman while were broken up. I KNOW, we broke up. It was fair for him to talk to other women. But this is eating at me. He mentioned I should look at the new pic he posted on his instagram. I don't look at his profile, so I did tonight. I started looking at his older posts and saw a picture of him talking to this same woman on facetime with a ";)" and this was back from when we were apart. So, he obviously enjoyed talking to her. Thing is, he told me he didn't and that she was a negative person and got old. He told me she wasn't and isn't me and that's why he asked for another chance. I believe him, but I'm jealous! I'm just so so jealous. The thing is, I love him with all of me and I'm afraid he'll want to be with her. Am I crazy? Anyone else feel especially vulnerable after a fresh getting back together?
kae Posted September 24, 2012 Posted September 24, 2012 wow your lucky not many get second chances.. you seem rational.. and logical.. i know that doesnt help with jealousy issues.. But what you can do is take what your boyfriend said was not cool about her and use it to your advantage.. consider yourself informed he just told you what he likes in a girl.. positive personality ect.. relish in this . Be empowered and dont let him know you are jealous over it. what can do is assume he knew you were going to see his old chat stuff and was possibly testing you.. No reaction equals no chain reaction. and dont be different then him. Dont share ANY of your experiences outside the relationship. keep him on his toes.. yay girl power!
Author lawlessloveless Posted September 24, 2012 Author Posted September 24, 2012 I'll definitely take your advice. I'm using this to my advantage lol. I thought about why he wanted me to come across the photos because obviously I'd see them. Sometimes I'm not too careful in my reactions to things, so thank you for that insight. I'm just gonna keep it to myself. I have brought her up before, but he feels bad about it and I don't want him to because we weren't together. Past is past. I have no stories to tell of my own from our breakup, but I won't tell him that lol. Thank you again. I needed to get this off my chest and sometimes I get rude comments on forums, but you were very thoughtful.
ashtree-house Posted September 25, 2012 Posted September 25, 2012 You are really lucky for a second chance and if you really want to make it work, don't mention the jealousy. Rise above it. For all you know, they could have been talking about you. I've been accused of "being the other woman" after one of my close guy friends break-up with their girlfriends..when in all reality I sit there and listen to them rant or try or talk about thier exes. Congrats on getting him back
Gulf-Delta Posted September 25, 2012 Posted September 25, 2012 IDK, if communication was an issue for you guys, I tihnk being honest about your fears and concerns with him would be a good idea. ...And post you story, silly ;p
AsYouWish Posted September 25, 2012 Posted September 25, 2012 I know jealousy can really suck but it is best to let yourself feel it (privately) and if need be vent about it here. Now that you have a second chance, congrats btw, try and let go of the past this is a new chapter in the story of your relationship. The past is the past what matters is the he is with you. Trust him unless he gives you a reason not to.
golk Posted September 27, 2012 Posted September 27, 2012 I completely agree with everyone here. You have to think of this as a fresh start to the relationship, not continuing the past one. I know because I also got a second chance with my ex after 1.5 months of being broken up with. I let my jealousy of her flirting with other guys get the best of me and it would start fights every time. Just let it be and vent on here.
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