southernsweetie16 Posted September 23, 2012 Posted September 23, 2012 In October of last year, I met my now ex-boyfriend. We began dating, and things were amazing. He was my first love, and he treated me like every girl wants to be treated. A few months after we began dating, he lost his job. Things completely changed for the two of us. I think he became depressed. I did everything I could for him, and looking back, I realize I was a bit too clingy. I still wanted to hang out with him, and he didn't feel like leaving his house. He broke up with me in May. I was devastated, but the two of us remained friends. About three weeks after the break up, our friendship took an unexpected turn. I guess the sexual tension between the two of us built up.... and a kind of "friends with benefits" relationship began. I know he doesn't want a relationship, but I do. He still treats me the same as he did when we were dating, we just don't have "date night," and he rarely says "I love you." He's told me he does, but he doesn't want to lead me on. Then later will say that he isn't sure if he does or not. My problem is... I am hopelessly in love with this man. It's almost an addiction. If he cancels plans, I am a wreck. I believe he's still depressed because he has yet to find a job at the level his previous one was, and sometimes his mood will change suddenly. I take everything personally. I really don't know what to do. He doesn't know this, but I still cry about our breakup often. He is constantly on my mind. I can't stop thinking about all the good times we had together. I don't want to stop seeing him, and I don't want to stop the physical contact. I need it, and I feel like if we stop, he will find someone else to satisfy him, and I'll lose any chance I might have had to become his girlfriend again. I should also mention that he is my best friend. No contact could never work... I think I would go crazy. I guess I'm asking for advice. What would you do if you were in my situation?
geegirl Posted September 23, 2012 Posted September 23, 2012 I don't want to stop seeing him, and I don't want to stop the physical contact. I need it, and I feel like if we stop, he will find someone else to satisfy him, and I'll lose any chance I might have had to become his girlfriend again. This is just sad and pathetic. You would allow a man to have his way with your body and soul just to make him love you. You have zero self-esteem and zero dignity and he knows this and he uses it to his benefit. You've lost your chance to become anything more than a **** buddy. When you demote yourself to such levels, he doesn't promote you to anything other than just someone that he has sex with. When a man loses respect for you because he knows that you don't even respect yourself and your body, chances are you will always remain where you are. You think he sleeps with you because he loves you? No. He sleeps with you because you satisfy a need. It's sex. He even said he is not sure if he loves you. Find your self-respect.
love does not exist Posted September 24, 2012 Posted September 24, 2012 People need to stop having sex till they get married. That **** will **** your life up.
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