blueline Posted September 23, 2012 Posted September 23, 2012 (edited) I've been dating a girl I met through my graduate program since last October. As usual, it felt like I met the girl of my dreams. I had a huge crush on her since we first met and we were friends for a few months before hooking up. She has some eccentricities I have that nobody else does. However, I started to find out she didn't really have the strong feelings I had for her. When we started going to parties, she would totally ignore me and run from here to there w/o me. There was one time I told her that her behavior during parties totally annoyed me and made me feel like she didn't love me. There was one time she was drinking and convinced this very attractive guy to wrestle with her (I mean he really didn't want to do it until she insisted). This seriously perturbed me (she's always giving this dude come-on signals and he's always ignoring them - what a rare guy), so I pulled her over and told her. The previous night, she was in some group hug with a bunch of guys and proclaimed "I want to **** everybody here except him [implication being me]" after we fought that night because she was ignoring me. She acted as if she never made such a statement and never apologized. This destroyed my trust in her. When we are not in her homestate, she is a sweetheart but I don't feel like it's real. She has zero friends here (I have none myself). We spend literally all our free time together possibly b/c we have nothing else. The physical element of the relationship is dead due to this yeast infection we were passing back and forth. After many failures to treat my yeast since may, the doc finally gave me diflucan 3 weeks ago and we started having sex again. The last 3-4 sessions were forced, she couldn't get moist/arroused after foreplay entirely led by me (she used to be so enthusiastic). The doc said she had zero signs of yeast last Monday. I love her so damn much but I feel like our relationship ran its course months ago. She just has no options out here (6 hrs away from her hometown), so she clings to me desperately. That's not love, though. I can't imagine the month I'd have to live with her post-breakup. She makes me feel terrible these days, the relationship is destroying my self-esteem but she used my idealism to finagle me onto a lease which makes it hard to break up. She's been trying to get a dog, which I was cool with until I realized the physical component of the relationship was dead because she is no longer turned on by me. I can try literally everything with foreplay and oral and she barely gets aroused. I used to be able to merely whisper a few silly things in her ear and she'd be ready to jump my bones. How do I do this? I have no other friends, no where to crash if she gets too emotional when I dump her. Edited September 23, 2012 by blueline
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