KurtAmbrose Posted September 23, 2012 Posted September 23, 2012 Like the title says I have no clue what to do we also have a 2 year old son together
AnotherRound Posted September 23, 2012 Posted September 23, 2012 Wow, tough situation. I would start by asking yourself, what do you want? Is it a relationship that you are willing to work on? To stay in? I personally don't believe in staying for the sake of the children, as I think that does more harm than good in most cases. So, aside from all of the other stuff - where are you at regarding your feelings for her? For the two of you together? And, if she is pregnant, and the baby isn't yours, with that? Or, what if the baby is yours? I don't envy you this situation, it's definitely a doozy. I hope it all works out for you... It sounds like it's going to be a rough road for at least a while.
road Posted September 23, 2012 Posted September 23, 2012 How did you find out? How do you know the affair is over? Is there NC? How do you know that the child maybe the OM? Does the OM know that your WW is knocked up? Get the book Surviving An Affair by Dr Harley.
Author KurtAmbrose Posted September 23, 2012 Author Posted September 23, 2012 I love her and was trying to get past the cheating ( she said nothing physical happined ) but I'm prety sure it did but I don't know if I can raise the om kid I don't know how I could have the constant reminder in my life and love it like a baby should be loved
january2011 Posted September 23, 2012 Posted September 23, 2012 she said nothing physical happined How does that work if she might be pregnant by the OM?
Author KurtAmbrose Posted September 23, 2012 Author Posted September 23, 2012 (edited) I have some evidence to show she was lying about it not being physical and I don't know fore sure if she is pregnant but I know her cycle and this morning she about 3:40 am after she put are son back to bed she seemed very concerned with the date Edited September 23, 2012 by KurtAmbrose Spelling
whichwayisup Posted September 23, 2012 Posted September 23, 2012 I have some evidence to show she was lying about it not being physical and I don't know fore sure if she is pregnant but I know her cycle and this morning she about 3:40 am after she put are son back to bed she seemed very concerned with the date You take a paternity test. Make sure she knows this is going to happen whether she likes it or not. If she did not have sex with him, then this shouldn't be an issue (reguarding who is the father) at all! But unfortunately it is and she has to own up to what she's done, even if it hurts you. The truth has to come out.
Author KurtAmbrose Posted September 23, 2012 Author Posted September 23, 2012 Never thought I would be happy to see a tampon wrapper in the trash and a middol battle on the counter now I can work on the lying and cheating its odd to be this happy about being cheated on and lyed to.
GLDheart Posted September 23, 2012 Posted September 23, 2012 First, my heart breaks for you and your son. Mommy has been in the fog thinking only of herself. Ouch. It's time for you to shut up and start letting her do all the talking. You need to pay attention now. The key is wether she is ready to stop this behavior and refocus on the family. If she's not 100% devoted, she gets the boot... end of story. You and your son deserve nothing less. If she wants to "fix things", then NO CONTACT is so important you have no idea. She needs to stay completely away from this guy. She cannot be trusted to do the right thing (obviously). If this is what you want, it's a long road. I wish you success. In my story, I couldn't take it and instead decided on a different path... a life without my beautiful little liar.
whichwayisup Posted September 23, 2012 Posted September 23, 2012 Never thought I would be happy to see a tampon wrapper in the trash and a middol battle on the counter now I can work on the lying and cheating its odd to be this happy about being cheated on and lyed to. She didn't tell you she got her period? You had to find out on your own?
BetrayedH Posted September 23, 2012 Posted September 23, 2012 She didn't tell you she got her period? You had to find out on your own? Yeah, this sounds a little sketchy to me. How convenient for the tampon wrapper and Midol bottle just being in plain view. She communicated she was nervous and then doesn't tell you when her period happens? Waywards know no boundaries when it comes to lying over this crap. Good grief. Gaslighting at its finest. 1
LoveTKO Posted September 23, 2012 Posted September 23, 2012 Go with your gut instinct. You need to confront her and engage her with some open ended probing questions about her whereabouts, her period, and whatever else under the sun you think is relevant to her having been unfaithful. Make a mental note of what she says and probe her again a week later but phrase the questions a little different; if she deviates from the details from her initial answers then you know she's hiding something, or she's making it up as she goes along.
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