Leigh 87 Posted September 22, 2012 Posted September 22, 2012 So how many of you still go out to pubs/clubs? And how old are you? And is it a deal breaker if you met a great mate, yet they went out when you didn't? And if you prefered people who did not go out, would you compromise if you really liked them, and permitt them to go out occasionally rather than all the time? Lastly: if YOU are a party animal yourself, would you want to be with a partner who did not go out? I am 25 and love going out/partying but seldom do. I rather wait for quality people to go with who I really want to spend time catching up/going out with, and I rather save up to go to a decent place (out in Sydney, rather than the smaller town I am from over an hour away) I love staying at home and doing things with people as much as I do going out, but I do LOVE love love going out. It looks like a lot of people stop going out to clubs once they hit their late 20's and early thirties.... Yet I want to continue travelling and celebrating around the world in the places I go.... You know, meeting knew people, drinking, sharing a good time with them. I look young for my age so i would not rule out " going out" to a club or two.
ThaWholigan Posted September 22, 2012 Posted September 22, 2012 I go occasionally. I go through stages when I want to rave and times where I could take it or leave it. Now is one of those times. Especially since I haven't performed in a while. At 24, I still got a couple of party years left in my youth - but honestly, I could take it or leave it. It's not really my concern when it comes to a mate - unless she's a regular cocaine user or drinker who's likely to get into mishaps when out.
jobaba Posted September 22, 2012 Posted September 22, 2012 Mid 30s. I go out every now and then. But I am pretty busy these days. My friends have fallen off and gotten married and had kids and even those who are still single have begun to think the whole bar/drinking scene is getting old. But I still get hammered a few times a month. When I was in my late 20s, I used to go out three to four times a week, and many times two to three nights in a row. Mostly bars and lounges. We were done with clubs by mid 20s. Some nights were good, many nights were bad. When you're bad with women and you go out a lot, it pretty much amplifies that fact. I have ugly, ugly stories of rejections. It would make you flinch. I was able to kind/sorta find my niche by my early 30s though. For my 30th birthday party, nearly 150 people showed up. If I had it this year, I'd be lucky if 15 people showed up. Part of that is my fault, but people fall off a lot in their 30s, so I suggest you socialize and go out now, because those days of having a lot of people out en masse will be mostly a memory by your mid 30s.
GirlontheLam Posted September 22, 2012 Posted September 22, 2012 I go at happy hour. And sometimes to socialize. I am 34. But I have super low tolerance. So I generally only go to places with great cocktails and/or food. Since I am only having one drink, I am not going to waste it on something crappy to "get drunk as fast as possible." I am in it for the conversation in another atmosphere. Occasionally I'll even go dancing....at a bar! I haven't been clubbing in a while. I would game to go if the music didn't suck, but I don't have the energy to stay out till 4 AM anymore.
Regrets58 Posted September 22, 2012 Posted September 22, 2012 I'm 54 and went out frequently with recent ex (58). Mostly pub for drinks and meal. She liked to dance though,so would sometimes go to clubs with her Daughter and Husband! Unusual for me,thought I had left that all behind 25 years ago. Lot of fun though and wouldn't rule it out with someone else.
veggirl Posted September 22, 2012 Posted September 22, 2012 29. I will go to sports bars or dives, but I don't go to clubs anymore. I would feel like a weirdo partying with 22 yr old kids and I'm not interested in getting hit on by college boys. At 25 though (your age) I was still partying like that.
Author Leigh 87 Posted September 22, 2012 Author Posted September 22, 2012 Thanks for your responses. I too can take it or leave it! I think I am saving the real partying for the times I travel to other countries. Or when I have a high enough paying job, and have worthwhile people and places to go out to. I miss the raving lol and sure am looking for to it sometime... hopefull soon! And my partner was the first person I went out with. I never went to a club before him. Now I am just like most people in their 20's, who loves going out. At first it was not a dealbreaker although I did not like him partying with a bunch of sexy girls every weekend while I was at home. It is not a trust issue I trusted him, but still was not thrilledwith my parttner being in that environment without me.
Mme. Chaucer Posted September 22, 2012 Posted September 22, 2012 And if you prefered people who did not go out, would you compromise if you really liked them, and permitt them to go out occasionally rather than all the time? Just a little note: I don't think it's okay for people in relationships to be granting or withholding permission for each other to do things, or to be in charge of the frequency. If it's okay with you for your boyfriend to go out with his friends, that's fine. If it bothers you, that's fine too and you should let him know. What he chooses to do with that knowledge is up to him. And then, how you react is up to you. See?
Author Leigh 87 Posted September 22, 2012 Author Posted September 22, 2012 Just a little note: I don't think it's okay for people in relationships to be granting or withholding permission for each other to do things, or to be in charge of the frequency. If it's okay with you for your boyfriend to go out with his friends, that's fine. If it bothers you, that's fine too and you should let him know. What he chooses to do with that knowledge is up to him. And then, how you react is up to you. See? I am trying to just be a balanced, normal person; constant partying is a no no, but every now and again is normal. He goes out with his mates every weekend to their house and drinks, but he seldom EVER goes to clubs. Ever. And when he does, I always pick him up afterwards and take him home to sleep with me. After a nigh out clubbing, he has always wanted me to pick him up, and always says how forward he looks to hugging me in bed. He loves the coming home to me part as much as he does the parting, so it is not like he favours partying with mates over having a loving partner to come home to. I would not be comfortable if he changed, and went out more often, without telling me anthing about it, and without wanting to talk to me until sometime the next day where he starts acting " different". I think in regards to partners who go out and cheat, I would just know something was up with Andrew. I have learnt that I need a partner who does like his independence, has a great time with their friends while out, but wants me to pick them up and to come home to me after. I like that balance of independence and their attachment to me.
suladas Posted September 22, 2012 Posted September 22, 2012 I'm 23 and tired of the clubs, though I still go there because most of my friends do. Actually been twice in the past month and a half, but largely due to getting over a BU before that I was only going maybe once a year at most and could careless if I went at all. I just hate bars, I was ok with them at 18 for a little bit but they got old. Now i'm still a fan of partying a bit but I prefer a nice house party, at the lake or whatever, or just hanging out with a few people. But at the same time i'm getting to want to get drunk less and less every year and want to lived more settled. I would not date anyone who wanted to go to the bar more then a few times a year, whether they want me to go or not, I want someone past that phase of their life and more mature.
Author Leigh 87 Posted September 22, 2012 Author Posted September 22, 2012 I'm 23 and tired of the clubs, though I still go there because most of my friends do. Actually been twice in the past month and a half, but largely due to getting over a BU before that I was only going maybe once a year at most and could careless if I went at all. I just hate bars, I was ok with them at 18 for a little bit but they got old. Now i'm still a fan of partying a bit but I prefer a nice house party, at the lake or whatever, or just hanging out with a few people. But at the same time i'm getting to want to get drunk less and less every year and want to lived more settled. I would not date anyone who wanted to go to the bar more then a few times a year, whether they want me to go or not, I want someone past that phase of their life and more mature. That does not make sense; a person can want to go out say, every two weeks, and still be a loving and mature partner. They might just happen to enjoy club music and the social side of it and the dancing, without needing to go just to chase girls and get overly drunk and act like a moron.
xpaperxcutx Posted September 22, 2012 Posted September 22, 2012 I'm 22 and bf is 32 and we almost always go out together. He got me into the club scene because he has an affection for certain genre dj's and we share the same taste in music. If there's a good party boyfriend will always join me or take me with him. He has told me as much as he likes a good party, he wouldn't go anywhere unless I go with him. Like last weekend for example, I has some personal issues that prevented me from going to a party we both paid for. I told him to take me home and then head back out since his friends' were all there. Instead of going back to the party, he stayed with me the whole night. 1
runner Posted September 22, 2012 Posted September 22, 2012 So how many of you still go out to pubs/clubs? *raises hand... it's almost 2am at the moment And how old are you? thirty-five And is it a deal breaker if you met a great mate, yet they went out when you didn't? n/a. i'd be out even if not together. And if you prefered people who did not go out, would you compromise if you really liked them, and permitt them to go out occasionally rather than all the time? n/a again. Lastly: if YOU are a party animal PUBLICAN yourself, would you want to be with a partner who did not go out? i'd find it odd that she didn't want to be out with me, or with her own group of gal pals every once in a while. but not necessarily a deal breaker if she simply preferred to do stuff at home like read sci-fi novels or some other home body thing. it would be a deal breaker if she nagged about my publicanism. socialising and networking is just a part of my business (and leisure).
yongyong Posted September 22, 2012 Posted September 22, 2012 Bar and club are full of lonely people. there are people who came for a group thing but most people come as guys/girls group. Obviously as a guy, you are expecting to get laid. as a girl, you expect to meet a gentleman and enjoy the attention that you don't normally get during the day. It's such a low ROI. All regulars are sick of going there...but next week, they are there again.
Negative Nancy Posted September 22, 2012 Posted September 22, 2012 My friends have fallen off and gotten married and had kids and even those who are still single have begun to think the whole bar/drinking scene is getting old. That is a big reason, yeah. That and them being scattered throughout the country. Part of that is my fault, but people fall off a lot in their 30s, so I suggest you socialize and go out now, because those days of having a lot of people out en masse will be mostly a memory by your mid 30s. I find this to be true as well.
Jane2011 Posted September 22, 2012 Posted September 22, 2012 When single, I'd go out to a low-key pub maybe twice a month. Or even just once a month. When coupled with someone, almost never.
runner Posted September 22, 2012 Posted September 22, 2012 When single, I'd go out to a low-key pub maybe twice a month. Or even just once a month. When coupled with someone, almost never. he doesn't take you out ? i get the whole staying in thing, which is nice, but i get cabin fever quickly.
suladas Posted September 22, 2012 Posted September 22, 2012 That does not make sense; a person can want to go out say, every two weeks, and still be a loving and mature partner. They might just happen to enjoy club music and the social side of it and the dancing, without needing to go just to chase girls and get overly drunk and act like a moron. Sure they can, but I have no interest being with them if they want that. If a girl wants to dance every once in a while sure i'd be happy to go or even if she goes with friends whatever, but not every few weeks, no way. I'd rather be spending a friday or saturday night together doing something else.
Jane2011 Posted September 22, 2012 Posted September 22, 2012 he doesn't take you out ? i get the whole staying in thing, which is nice, but i get cabin fever quickly. Oh, we go out a lot. Just not to pubs and bars. He's not into that scene, and I only am a little. I went to a political rally with him yesterday. We've gone to the symphony (last weekend), coffee shops, plays/theater events, out to restaurants to eat, to some lecture at the local university, etc. Or we go walking at parks and stuff. It's plenty of outside-the-house activity for me. 1
Mallow Posted September 22, 2012 Posted September 22, 2012 I go out on occasion, I'm not big on the party scene. If my significant other wants to go out, I won't stop them, I trust them. I've never been attracted to those who party excessively, so this has never been an issue to me in any of my relationships. I'm in my 20's.
NYC-BigKat Posted September 22, 2012 Posted September 22, 2012 So how many of you still go out to pubs/clubs? And how old are you? And is it a deal breaker if you met a great mate, yet they went out when you didn't? And if you prefered people who did not go out, would you compromise if you really liked them, and permitt them to go out occasionally rather than all the time? Lastly: if YOU are a party animal yourself, would you want to be with a partner who did not go out? I am 25 and love going out/partying but seldom do. I rather wait for quality people to go with who I really want to spend time catching up/going out with, and I rather save up to go to a decent place (out in Sydney, rather than the smaller town I am from over an hour away) I love staying at home and doing things with people as much as I do going out, but I do LOVE love love going out. It looks like a lot of people stop going out to clubs once they hit their late 20's and early thirties.... Yet I want to continue travelling and celebrating around the world in the places I go.... You know, meeting knew people, drinking, sharing a good time with them. I look young for my age so i would not rule out " going out" to a club or two. I dont go to clubs 'cause I dont do well in them. It really really bothers me to see jerks and badboys get all the success but I'm not really a homebody either though its not a bad idea when u dont always have fun outdoors .
MercuryMorrison1 Posted September 22, 2012 Posted September 22, 2012 I'm 24 years old and I don't go to clubs to often. I'm a little introverted and for most part don't enjoy being around the type of people you typically meet in clubs and dive's. I do go out every now and then in an attempt to broden my social horizon's. As far as dating someone who ''clubs'' often. I don't know, its hard to say without really knowing the individule. The thing that I think would bother me most is that ''generally speaking'' people go to clubs in an attempt to be noticed by the opposite sex. If I'm in a commited relationship with someone I don't particlularly like the idea of her going with the sole intention of getting extra attention by other men as I would expect her to feel the same way about me wanting extra attention from other women.
Author Leigh 87 Posted September 23, 2012 Author Posted September 23, 2012 Sure they can, but I have no interest being with them if they want that. If a girl wants to dance every once in a while sure i'd be happy to go or even if she goes with friends whatever, but not every few weeks, no way. I'd rather be spending a friday or saturday night together doing something else. My partner and I often spend Friday and/or Saturday together. We both love just having a quiet and " close" nights ( as he calls them), where we just watch TV and hug and enjoy each others company. We do not go to clubs anymore, because of the cost and also the fact there are no worthwhile ones to go to or people we want to go out with that badly. So, as you can see we both love going out AND staying in, and we have not been to a club in.... Well, me since last year!
Author Leigh 87 Posted September 23, 2012 Author Posted September 23, 2012 I'm 24 years old and I don't go to clubs to often. I'm a little introverted and for most part don't enjoy being around the type of people you typically meet in clubs and dive's. I do go out every now and then in an attempt to broden my social horizon's. As far as dating someone who ''clubs'' often. I don't know, its hard to say without really knowing the individule. The thing that I think would bother me most is that ''generally speaking'' people go to clubs in an attempt to be noticed by the opposite sex. If I'm in a commited relationship with someone I don't particlularly like the idea of her going with the sole intention of getting extra attention by other men as I would expect her to feel the same way about me wanting extra attention from other women. My partner admitted that was a factor in his decline in " going to clubs". He has never been on to go out FOR girls, yet he did admit that " yeah, I guess having you has had something to do with me not going anymore, seeing as when you go out to clubs you sort of have it in the back of our mind that you could meet a nice girl" And he is not one to go out for pussy. honestly, he is the ultimate guy ALWAYS is in it for the good time with his mates.. and if even he can see that it is STILL a little about women, then EVERY guy would ( seeing as my partner did not pick up girls often or bother with them and rather prefered his mates)
sin_bad Posted September 24, 2012 Posted September 24, 2012 Why does it even matter? Is it a contest to see who goes out more? If you like to go out, go out. If you want to stay at home, stay at home. Simple.
Recommended Posts