bluefairy812 Posted September 21, 2012 Posted September 21, 2012 just wondering, because it always has been the case with me.. and its been two months going on three, and i haven't received anything near wanting to get back.. but i hear that usually at one point or another, an ex may return.
Calico Posted September 21, 2012 Posted September 21, 2012 The ones who dumped me always came back, no exception, however, none of them came back before I was over them and had a new, happy relationship. It was also never soon, never under a year or two. 6
youngnlove89 Posted September 21, 2012 Posted September 21, 2012 All of my ex's came back, but it was usually later down the road after being with several girls. I guess they realized I was the best. DUH! But it was always too late. ALWAYS. I was usually in another relationship or just indifferent. Don't count on it though. It isn't guarranted to happen. Just because it happened to us doens't mean it will with this guy. My current ex came back several times but it never worked when he came back. The old problems came with him too. It doesn't work. It's nice to feel wanted but it won't go where you want it to go. If you count on him coming back, you will never fully let go.
I'm nuts Posted September 21, 2012 Posted September 21, 2012 No, but in your heart you will know who are the ones you will hear from in the future, most people split up because they are not compatible or there is something they don't like about the other person so why would they go back? I always had a feeling of who I would here from sometime in the future and who wouldn't, you know deep within.
Gab09 Posted September 21, 2012 Posted September 21, 2012 I'm in sort of the same boat. I always had Exs who wanted to get back with me, but like previously stated, never before I was with somebody else. My last Ex, same.. Whenever we would break up, she would eventually come back to me, but this time it was different.. She had a job! So I guess she felt a direction in her life, and is just letting the waves take her. Deep down I think I kind of hold on to hope, but I'm trying to accept that it won't happen.
PissOfMind Posted September 21, 2012 Posted September 21, 2012 All of my exes came back at some point (except for the very last one- but only 9 months have gone by). Even the biggest ***hole returned after 3 years with an apology. How nice. He wanted to meet, I turned him down though. As you all say, they will probably come back but this will happen when you no longer care. And good for you. Those people have already hurt you once, and let it be the end of that.
sweetheart5381 Posted September 21, 2012 Posted September 21, 2012 Yep, in my experience they always come back. Most often for a piece of tail (but pretending it is because they miss me or cough, cough....love me, lol). My last one did this to me and ruined what I thought could have been a decent friendship. By treating me like a vagina he completely disrespected me. I therefore lost all respect for him - case closed, end of any sort of personal relationship at all. 1
Sameold Posted September 21, 2012 Posted September 21, 2012 Can't see my ex ever coming back, her priority lies with things outside of relationships so the minute those other things start to slip the relationship will too. I think your ex is more likely to come back if you still live near her etc. When you are complete NC etc then I can't imagine them popping up and saying hello. Depends on the break-up too, mine was an emotional mess so to just speak up would be wierd. In the UK we have a phrase about "making your bed and lying in it". Once you make a decision most people just live through it. So if your ex has a gf or bf they will most likely just stick with them, it doesn't mean they made the right choice though...it just means they have accepted that they are where they are now, particularly as you get older and perhaos the GIGS stuff.
LostGirl11 Posted September 21, 2012 Posted September 21, 2012 If he does it wont be when you want him to, it will be when you've moved on and after he has dated/slept with several others, which in my opinion is a complete turn off.
geegirl Posted September 21, 2012 Posted September 21, 2012 Yes, each and every one but for all the wrong reasons. And it's always been after they've been with others and when you have moved on. Tryin' to get some tail I always believed, just bored or lacking prospects. 2
suladas Posted September 21, 2012 Posted September 21, 2012 It's only been 2 months and mine hasn't. I don't know if she ever will, but I do know there will be a day she will regret dumping me, if that day hasn't already come. But even though i'm not completely over her and as much as it would be nice to hear from her, I wouldn't take her back. And as much as it would feel nice to have her want me back, I really hope it doesn't happen because i'd rather her find someone else or be happy being single. And I wouldn't want to hurt her, as much as she hurt me all I wish is for her to be happy. Just gotta move on, it's ok to think once in a while that they might come back but you have to let it go and find someone else when you're ready. 1
okiedokie Posted September 21, 2012 Posted September 21, 2012 the general consensus seems to be that they have a built in radar that detects the exact moment you are over them and then they contact you, so it no longer matters. I think this is why many who are the dumpee originally & who have regained their footings and display the same attractive qualities that the dumper fell for initially only now having lived through the breakup and healed and bettered themselves are no longer interested...."been there done that"...I've eventually heard back from all of my exes (one 12 years later even) but I do not believe I will ever hear from my last ex again...I'm ok with that. 1
mike588 Posted September 21, 2012 Posted September 21, 2012 just wondering, because it always has been the case with me.. and its been two months going on three, and i haven't received anything near wanting to get back.. but i hear that usually at one point or another, an ex may return. My ex. g/f dumped me over a year ago for her ex b/f.... 6 months later she contacts me several times telling me how sorry she was for hurting me and she regrets it. My ex. wife dumped me 11 years ago and I heard from her last year... last Fri. night she calls me wanting to come over and she said she misses me. I haven't and won't go back to either!! 6
collegeguy_24 Posted September 21, 2012 Posted September 21, 2012 None of my exes ever came back, so its not universal. Admittedly I pushed my last one away by doing stupid crap, but she or the one before her never came back to me. TO be honest, you shouldn't think about this now. You should focus on moving on, bettering yourself, and so on. TO heal.
NoMoreJerks Posted September 21, 2012 Posted September 21, 2012 Mine contacted me yesterday, week after we broke up and I started the NC.. Didn't reply.. He wanted to be friends.. Not replying, unless he offers something more substantial in the way of remorse and willingness to apologize and change the way he treated me. But I'm not holding my breath.
Svet74 Posted September 21, 2012 Posted September 21, 2012 To those of you who have not had their exes come back Be thankful!! Trust me, cuz by this point months later you are healed and moved on Ive had 2 serious relationship where both of my exes left me. With the first one he came back to apologize for being in idiot and asked to be friends, im guessing to keep me as an option just incase his current relationship didnt work out. I told him no and plus he was long distance so it was easier to just forget him and move on The second one was local been broken up a yr and a half and he made contact with me every month since the breakup. except one time 3 months of NC. this one is more difficult cuz we attend the same church so i see him at least once a week. sometimes less. He lead me on a lot, just a bunch of breadcrumbs, which slowed down my moving on process. lost a bunch of weight and so on. Now he finally met someone new. and rumors are that he is getting married to her. I called him out on it since we has talking to me and didnt tell me about her and i found out. I left it at that and didnt bring it up since then. I think they been talking 2 months now. I think the whole situation would be different if we at least didnt attend the same church or i lived in another town. SO yeah
Mike_d Posted September 21, 2012 Posted September 21, 2012 wow, a Mme. Chaucer check in, nice to see ya 1
mike588 Posted September 22, 2012 Posted September 22, 2012 I think most...most not all come back out of guilt or they realize what they had.... you treated them well...didn't cheat or beat and over all you were a good person...really loved him/her....respected that person and they start to miss that if/when they are lonely or compare you to the person they are with or just dumped. I also feel that most people become bored in a relationship after the "honeymoon" period ends and they seek excitement elsewhere (especially the younger people).. they meet someone else who is better looking...has more $$$$ etc. and believe they will be happy/could be happy with that person. After they realize they are not happy they look back and wonder what could have been with you... remember how good you were....how you really loved him or her and reach out to you. Just my 2 cents worth. 6
Sameold Posted September 22, 2012 Posted September 22, 2012 No, they don't always come back. They may not physically reach out but they are still capable of feeling the hurt, guilt, sorrow for the way they behaved or decisions that they made. The difference is that some people will just let it be whereas others need to spell it out loud. But we'll never really know their true emotions, they are probably as confused about them as us lot, particularly if they are seeing someone else etc..
Tree_Salmon Posted October 1, 2012 Posted October 1, 2012 The ones who dumped me always came back, no exception, however, none of them came back before I was over them and had a new, happy relationship. It was also never soon, never under a year or two. seems to go this way. its almost as if they can smell when you've moved on or are close to it.
Author bluefairy812 Posted October 1, 2012 Author Posted October 1, 2012 hope he does come back but i dont know anymore... i'm trying to date someone new...
Recommended Posts