Author Berna Posted October 31, 2012 Author Posted October 31, 2012 You are right geegirl. But I had to take it out from my system. Which I eventually did. He's just a jerk. He told me he decided to take a chance with his ex (they were only friends for more than two years) and that it was the hardest decision he had to make in his life. On the other hand I am glad I found out. This way, I know I won't take any of his crap again. I wish him all the luck in this world. Moving on.
Author Berna Posted November 5, 2012 Author Posted November 5, 2012 Last Thursday evening, he texts me "What's up? Are you feeling better today?" Yeah, right. In one day I'll feel better. I didn't reply. The next day he sends me a longish email, titled "Injustice". He said that he was very, very sad because of our issue. That I am being mean to him since I've found out somehow that he is with this girl. That I am threatening him that I'll destroy his life by writing a mail to his girlfriend. That he hasn't just taken, but also given in the relationship, even though it was long distance and that this is all my hurt ego speaking! And he pleaded that I start talking to him again! Well, I told him that I have no intention ruining anyone's life, since I am not like him. That he lied to me for 10 months, as he wanted to sit on 2 chairs at the same time. And that I want him to respect my pain and our relations from now on to be strictly professional. As he told me also that he has given me the job when I didn't have one, I told him that he has given a job to others too, and paid them more, and didn't f*** them. He replied that he didn't f*** me, but made love to me And said he was very very sorry that he hurt me. I didn't reply. That was Friday. No communication since. I really hope he would at least respect my decision to keep it LC and strictly professional, because this is killing me and I want to move on.
geegirl Posted November 5, 2012 Posted November 5, 2012 Just fishing for a reaction. Needless to say, gaslighting you into believing YOU did something wrong, so that he can relieve himself of any guilt. Poor man. Life is such an injustice. Only you can keep it professional. He will try to bust your boundaries because he has no respect for your needs or wants. You have to stay strong and keep him at bay.
Author Berna Posted December 27, 2012 Author Posted December 27, 2012 It's been three months since BU and two months since I found out about his girlfriend. I am not sure how I am. Sometimes I am fine, sometimes I am angry, sometimes nostalgic. I certainly don't want him back anymore, I guess it's my hurt ego.. I don't know. The contact is really low, so low that I am wandering whether he is interesting in this company anymore. I am trying to keep it strictly professional, and when he asks me how I am doing, I just reply that I am fine. I hate the question that follows every time "Are you really okay?". I say that I am. He plans to come in January now. He didn't come in November and December, as he said, which is great. I needed the time. I think I still do. I'd like it if he postponed the visit again. Darn, when am I going to get over him?
geegirl Posted December 27, 2012 Posted December 27, 2012 Takes time Berna, as cliche as it sounds. Plus, toxic relationships are very addictive so it's going to be a little more difficult to detach and it's going to take time to recover from the damage. It's only been 3 months. A good sign is that you know you don't want him back. That's the biggest hurdle. 1
Author Berna Posted March 18, 2013 Author Posted March 18, 2013 Long time, no see... It's been almost 6 months since BU and 5 months since I found out he is back with his ex. I was doing fine, most of the time. I could function normally, go to work, go for long walks, had a great time last week with my dog and some friends since the weather started to warm up. Life was good. Then he arrives to my country (on business). We had a talk. Found out his girlfriend found out about us but didn't leave him because, as he said, when we were together they weren't. However she "didn't leave him to come to Belgrade alone" So she was sitting in the hotel room while he was going on business meetings? Really? So if we wanted to have sex, wouldn't we have done it somewhere else? ROFLMAO. Anyway. We talked on Saturday and since his bosses were pressuring him to sell the company which he owns and I worked at, he told me this: "I have disappointed you with our personal issue, I don't want to disappoint you in the business issue too". So I thought he would not sell the company since chances are that if he did that, my place in the company would be in jeopardy. The next day, Sunday, he sold the company. After a meeting with the distributors we shook hands and said goodbye (very formal) and he told me not to think stupid things that I would lose my job. I had already turned my back on him and said nothing. He left for the hotel. This morning he left the city with his girlfriend (I didn't see him today). I just wrote him this: "This is the second time you are betraying me. It will be the last. You don't exist for me anymore." What a huge, huge disappointment. What a sad excuse for a man!!
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