ImperfectionisBeauty Posted September 18, 2012 Posted September 18, 2012 I always wonder about this because I am black and I pretty much only date white men... I love them! I always wonder if they like dating outside their race. I personally am not like.. Youre average black girl (not to be stereotypical) but I love country I grew up in the burbs I have a valley girl type voice lol all my friends call me Oreo haha I always feel so afraid to approach them because what if I'm not good enough or pretty enough or they only like white women? It just scares me but I know I'm not attracted to black guys so..
Titanwolf Posted September 18, 2012 Posted September 18, 2012 BRB, asking every white man on Earth.. 3
ThaWholigan Posted September 18, 2012 Posted September 18, 2012 Last time I checked, they were OK with it so..... 1
Author ImperfectionisBeauty Posted September 18, 2012 Author Posted September 18, 2012 BRB, asking every white man on Earth.. Haha I didn't mean it like that but like in general
Author ImperfectionisBeauty Posted September 18, 2012 Author Posted September 18, 2012 Last time I checked, they were OK with it so..... I guess I mean like do I have to feel anxious and scared if I wanted to approach one? I feel afraid that they wouldn't think I'm pretty enough or good enough or even think to approach me at all
ThaWholigan Posted September 18, 2012 Posted September 18, 2012 I guess I mean like do I have to feel anxious and scared if I wanted to approach one? I feel afraid that they wouldn't think I'm pretty enough or good enough or even think to approach me at all Not really no. A lot of black girls are quite forthcoming about dating white guys these days, especially on OLD sites. I've been rejected by quite a few of them even . As far as I know, white guys have no problems dating black girls. However, I don't know where you live and if it's common. But still, if you're attracted to them, you shouldn't feel bad about it, just go for it. And don't worry about disappointments - they will happen. But try to stay positive. 2
Titanwolf Posted September 18, 2012 Posted September 18, 2012 Ironic how the two respondents are indeed, black . Any white men want to chime in?.
suladas Posted September 18, 2012 Posted September 18, 2012 For me it's really hit and miss, some I find attractive some I don't. If you like someone though, just approach them and see what happens. Not sure why though, but if they aren't white I find myself to be much more picky but I am open to almost any race if they look attractive to me.
SmileFace Posted September 18, 2012 Posted September 18, 2012 Yes, unless all my relations and relationships with white guys have been imaginary. 1
Feelin Frisky Posted September 18, 2012 Posted September 18, 2012 I see beauty and character before color. I have dated and had LTRs with African American women. I love the smell of cocoa butter in the morning. 2
Author ImperfectionisBeauty Posted September 18, 2012 Author Posted September 18, 2012 For me it's really hit and miss, some I find attractive some I don't. If you like someone though, just approach them and see what happens. I hate approaching guys I don't want to be rejected its like the most lowest feeling
SmileFace Posted September 18, 2012 Posted September 18, 2012 I see beauty and character before color. I have dated and had LTRs with African American women. I love the smell of cocoa butter in the morning. I am going to assume that you are not talking about the lotion - since my mind is just dirty like that. 1
SensitiveTJ Posted September 18, 2012 Posted September 18, 2012 Ironic how the two respondents are indeed, black . Any white men want to chime in?. White guy checking in here. I have never dated a black girl, or anyone outside my race, for that matter. I would certainly consider it. However, it's very possible I would be more...selective. As in, I would have to be more sure of our compatibility before I made a move. Solely because my eye is not naturally drawn to people outside my race, I would want to know more about them, so the bar would be set higher I suppose. I think that's the best way to explain it.
ascendotum Posted September 18, 2012 Posted September 18, 2012 I always feel so afraid to approach them because what if I'm not good enough or pretty enough or they only like white women? It just scares me.... It is a relationship that is less common than the BM with WF. There are probably quite a few guys out there that are just not into black girls. At the same time there is probably a lot of white guys who think you're cute but are wary of hitting on you because they think most black girls want black guys. Do you get anxious or sacared when it comes to black guys or have you never gone for them? When you approach a guy do it casually, and strike up a conversation, and watch his body language. Also from your perspective, use body language to convey that you fancy him (there are likely a number of sites or youtube vids that will deal with this, and there are books out there). If you do a good job with the body language (smiles + eyes can convey a lot sometimes) and the guy is not too clueless, you hopefully can get him to break the ice with you. Feeling anxious is not really a pleasant feeling, but guys are much more forgiving of it than women are when a guy is anxious. I gather the white guys you have had as bf's in the past hit on you. If you were to take the initiative, you would have a better chance of getting the guys you really fancy. Good Luck.
SmileFace Posted September 18, 2012 Posted September 18, 2012 I personally wouldn't approach any guy out right. It doesn't matter what his race is but I just wanted to added that you can walk up to a guy who is your race and you may not find you attractive the same way. So if you have the nerve to approach a guy - you can approach any guy. People get turned downed all the time - it is life.
Feelin Frisky Posted September 18, 2012 Posted September 18, 2012 I hate approaching guys I don't want to be rejected its like the most lowest feeling No one likes that. My experience has been that white females can be so much more complicated and neurotic than black. I don't like to speak in those racial terms for my own intellectual reasons but I have lived and worked around black people all my long adult life and can say I've only been rejected cruelly by white women who seem to think their shi+ doesn't stink. When I have gone to parties hosted by black people I worked with, I found the ladies to be mostly "up front" about whether they wanted to know me or not and I never felt out of place (except once when my LT black g/f and I were invited by a lesbian to an all black lesbian party where she neglected to mention that I would be in the way of some major bull dyke orgy. That was not fun.).
Disenchantedly Yours Posted September 18, 2012 Posted September 18, 2012 I guess I mean like do I have to feel anxious and scared if I wanted to approach one? I feel afraid that they wouldn't think I'm pretty enough or good enough or even think to approach me at all Are you saying you wouldn't feel anxious and scared if you were going to approach any man?? Just with white guys you feel this way? Do you think that because you are black?? That you aren't pretty enough for them? Or because of how you think you look independent of your color? Have you had experiences where white guys didn't treat you so nice? I read one time that there would come a time when white people where the minoirty. Because a lot of people enjoy interacial dating. Men and women. I don't personally like approaching men but I have been attracted to a wide variety of men myself and never thought my color was the reasons they weren't or were going to like me, even if it was different from them. I usually thought it would have to do with other external factors but never the color of my skin. I guess I also wouldn't mind if a guy didn't want to date me because I was white. Which has more to do with my heritage and not who I am as a person or a woman. But if he didn't want to date me because of other external factors, I might take it more personally because that would have more to do with my more womanly features maybe he found lacking. I see interacial couples all the time. I think you need to try approach dating color free. Meaning, if you like a guy, independent of his color and independent of yours, and you like approaching guys, then go for it. Don't look at him as a "white guy" or "black guy". You might be doing yourself a disservice both ways to automatically credit white guys and dismiss black men. Ultimately, you never know if someone is going to be receptive to you or dismissive of you on any set of factors. Could be skin color, breast size, height, weight, hair color.. And there are people out there that like dating people because of their differences and there are people out there that like dating people because of their similarities. It sounds like maybe you are more interested in dating white men because you think you have more in common with them. There is nothing wrong with that. I just think you are doing yourself a disservice to think you aren't pretty enough for men of other cultures. Lots of white men like black women and find them very sexy. 1
DuchessKaye Posted September 18, 2012 Posted September 18, 2012 Well my boyfriend is white but he's told me many times how much he likes blacks and has never approached non-black before me, he just said that for some reason he doesn't mind that I am light and that I'm an exception so...
Author ImperfectionisBeauty Posted September 18, 2012 Author Posted September 18, 2012 I always feel so afraid to approach them because what if I'm not good enough or pretty enough or they only like white women? It just scares me.... It is a relationship that is less common than the BM with WF. There are probably quite a few guys out there that are just not into black girls. At the same time there is probably a lot of white guys who think you're cute but are wary of hitting on you because they think most black girls want black guys. Do you get anxious or sacared when it comes to black guys or have you never gone for them? When you approach a guy do it casually, and strike up a conversation, and watch his body language. Also from your perspective, use body language to convey that you fancy him (there are likely a number of sites or youtube vids that will deal with this, and there are books out there). If you do a good job with the body language (smiles + eyes can convey a lot sometimes) and the guy is not too clueless, you hopefully can get him to break the ice with you. Feeling anxious is not really a pleasant feeling, but guys are much more forgiving of it than women are when a guy is anxious. I gather the white guys you have had as bf's in the past hit on you. If you were to take the initiative, you would have a better chance of getting the guys you really fancy. Good Luck. I have never approached black men. The white guys I have been with all approached me on a dating website
Woggle Posted September 18, 2012 Posted September 18, 2012 I would date a black woman but if I were single I would stay away from the kind who only date white men. To me somebody who is against people of their own background strikes me as having some issues. 6
Author ImperfectionisBeauty Posted September 18, 2012 Author Posted September 18, 2012 I would date a black woman but if I were single I would stay away from the kind who only date white men. To me somebody who is against people of their own background strikes me as having some issues. I'm not against them I'm just not attracted to them
MrCastle Posted September 18, 2012 Posted September 18, 2012 I would date a black woman but if I were single I would stay away from the kind who only date white men. To me somebody who is against people of their own background strikes me as having some issues. Agreed. Although I stay away from anyone who says "I only date (any race here)" or "I'm mostly attracted to (any race here)", it is a little more serious when they're excluding people of their own race.
KungFuJoe Posted September 18, 2012 Posted September 18, 2012 I'm not against them I'm just not attracted to them Do half white guys count? I have been attracted to several black women in the past. Would have no problem dating one.
oaks Posted September 18, 2012 Posted September 18, 2012 Ironic how the two respondents are indeed, black . Any white men want to chime in?. I don't like "black girls". I do like "attractive girls", and some of those happen to be black. 4
somedude81 Posted September 18, 2012 Posted September 18, 2012 I'm not against them I'm just not attracted to them That's almost the same thing. It seems odd not being attracted to the same ethnicity that you are. As for you question, I would date a black girl as long as she wasn't ghetto, not that loud and had a decent attitude. I also prefer long hair and not afroish.
Recommended Posts