sofrustrated25 Posted September 17, 2012 Posted September 17, 2012 Friend of mine asked me to post this. She's been talking on and off with a guy who lives out of state. They've known each other from a distance for 4 years now. He has been wanting a relationship. They text back and forth. He now is asking her to send pictures of her private parts via text. When she said no to the lower part... He told her that he was disappointed in her and wouldnt respond to her further texts until he saw the picture. I am not in the know.. In the dating world. Neither is she. Is this normal? The pics do not identify her... But still!
suladas Posted September 17, 2012 Posted September 17, 2012 If he's being like that no way, i'd stop talking to him. I can see someone asking for them, and if they don't show a face then I see no issue. 1
somedude81 Posted September 17, 2012 Posted September 17, 2012 How stupid. She should stop talking to the creep.
EasyHeart Posted September 17, 2012 Posted September 17, 2012 She needs to send the pictures to me before I can answer your question. 2
todreaminblue Posted September 17, 2012 Posted September 17, 2012 Friend of mine asked me to post this. She's been talking on and off with a guy who lives out of state. They've known each other from a distance for 4 years now. He has been wanting a relationship. They text back and forth. He now is asking her to send pictures of her private parts via text. When she said no to the lower part... He told her that he was disappointed in her and wouldnt respond to her further texts until he saw the picture. I am not in the know.. In the dating world. Neither is she. Is this normal? The pics do not identify her... But still! I would tell your friend nooooooooo dont do it.......I have done it once a long time ago and regretted it even though i know they were deleted......100 per cent guaranteed deleted. Doesn't matter if they were deleted what matters is i lowered myself to send them and it isn't me..i don't even like my photo taken.no excuses from me, i did it but i was vulnerable at the time..i destroyed and asked for all photos that contained me when i split with my ex......and if your friend breaks up with her boyfriend .....there are those pictures emails texts photos out there....tell her don't send them tell her to show her boyfriend in person her private parts when they spend time together and he can have the mental images.....a lot easier to fade over time than hard copies...... what if your friend sent them to the wrong phone number or worse to every one on her phone luckily that didn't happen to me but it can happen.I will never do it again and i suggest your friend does not either it will make her feel used and insecure at a later date maybe it did me.
LittleTiger Posted September 17, 2012 Posted September 17, 2012 He's a control freak and possibly an abusive one. Telling her he is 'disappointed in her' is a sure sign that he wants power over her and getting her to agree to send naked photos is a way of proving his power - to himself and to her. Unless she has a very strong personality and she doesn't mind power games (which she is very likely to lose), she needs to steer clear of him. 1
Author sofrustrated25 Posted September 17, 2012 Author Posted September 17, 2012 Well what about photos that don't identify? The other issue in my opinion is his treatment of her...
LittleTiger Posted September 17, 2012 Posted September 17, 2012 The other issue in my opinion is his treatment of her... Exactly! This is the ONLY issue that matters! He is total scum!
whichwayisup Posted September 17, 2012 Posted September 17, 2012 Friend of mine asked me to post this. She's been talking on and off with a guy who lives out of state. They've known each other from a distance for 4 years now. He has been wanting a relationship. They text back and forth. He now is asking her to send pictures of her private parts via text. When she said no to the lower part... He told her that he was disappointed in her and wouldnt respond to her further texts until he saw the picture. I am not in the know.. In the dating world. Neither is she. Is this normal? The pics do not identify her... But still! Tell her NOT to send him any naked pictures! They may 'know' eachother long distance, but they don't "know" eachother face to face. It is NOT normal, especially his reaction. Tell her to dump this loser creepo asap!
CptObvious Posted September 17, 2012 Posted September 17, 2012 send them what could possibly go wrong?
Author sofrustrated25 Posted September 17, 2012 Author Posted September 17, 2012 She told him that she refuses to be treated that way and that withholding attention/texts until she sends private photos is not happening. He responded and said it was about her "keeping her word" that he's seen "more than his share of vag&inas"
NoMoreJerks Posted September 17, 2012 Posted September 17, 2012 Friend of mine asked me to post this. She's been talking on and off with a guy who lives out of state. They've known each other from a distance for 4 years now. He has been wanting a relationship. They text back and forth. He now is asking her to send pictures of her private parts via text. When she said no to the lower part... He told her that he was disappointed in her and wouldnt respond to her further texts until he saw the picture. I am not in the know.. In the dating world. Neither is she. Is this normal? The pics do not identify her... But still! ABSOLUTELY NOT. He's manipulating her. My ex did similar things, and it only gets worse the more you give in. TRUST ME. He is a sex addict (assuming such a disorder/addiction even exists) and/or is plain disrespectful and is using her for his sexual fantasies. This is not the way to go if he wants a relationship. Seriously. Trust me. She should run in the opposite direction.... Read up on Narcissistic Personality Disorder. One of the things that narcissists do? "Get a rush out of convincing others to engage in promiscuous sexual acts that they normally do not participate in." 16 Signs That You're A Narcissist - Business Insider
sweetheart5381 Posted September 17, 2012 Posted September 17, 2012 This is the equivalent of a "notch in the bedpost" mentality of a supposed LDR/online/texting relationship. Heck, maybe he could pass all the pics on to his friends laughing at her for her lack of self-respect if she does. If this guy really wanted to see the goods, he would be motivated to actually make her want to take her clothes off for him in person. He doesn't seem so inclined. Loser. I personally like to be kissed before I get f%*ked. 1
NoMoreJerks Posted September 17, 2012 Posted September 17, 2012 Also, 100% agreed with what someone else said about him playing power games and trying to gain control and prove that he has the power over her. GET RID OF HIS PATHETIC ASS. NOW. He's abusive and manipualtive, and possibly a narcissist.
sweetheart5381 Posted September 18, 2012 Posted September 18, 2012 Also, 100% agreed with what someone else said about him playing power games and trying to gain control and prove that he has the power over her. GET RID OF HIS PATHETIC ASS. NOW. He's abusive and manipualtive, and possibly a narcissist. Yes, threatening to end a "relationship" because someone will not send highly explicit pics is an obvious red-flag of power and control issues. He clearly assumes that his threatening/attempt to control will result positively for him which directly illustrates what he feels about her. He doesn't care for her as a person at all. 2
sweetheart5381 Posted September 18, 2012 Posted September 18, 2012 Boundaries - get some! Without them, one can become a victim to just about anyone. 2
Author sofrustrated25 Posted September 18, 2012 Author Posted September 18, 2012 Well she told him no. You know that he said that she wasn't trustworthy since she backed out of sending then and he says she was a liar and ended talking to her!!!!!
sweetheart5381 Posted September 18, 2012 Posted September 18, 2012 Well she told him no. You know that he said that she wasn't trustworthy since she backed out of sending then and he says she was a liar and ended talking to her!!!!! Then she (you) are better off. Good riddance. There is far better out there.
sweetheart5381 Posted September 18, 2012 Posted September 18, 2012 Well she told him no. You know that he said that she wasn't trustworthy since she backed out of sending then and he says she was a liar and ended talking to her!!!!! I could not count the number of times a man requested body pics, nude pics, etc of me. They would feign a "relationship", whatever it took to satisfy their needs. If they ever actually knew me or cared for me, they would never, EVER request that from me. Those dudes are epic failures. Some things are intended for in person relations. No man of mine will ever have a pic of my genitals. If they want it that bad, they can come and get it.
It's Just Me Posted September 18, 2012 Posted September 18, 2012 Exactly! This is the ONLY issue that matters! He is total scum! Agreed. And I'm guessing he's got lots more from other women as well.
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