True2form Posted September 17, 2012 Posted September 17, 2012 Been with a guy for 2 months and usually I can tell if a freak-out or strange behaviour is afoot but this came out of the blue. He had a big freak-out which started as we were going to bed and then continued as we woke up. He pretty much dumped me, walked out of the room to get ready for work. I stayed put, in shock and upset and then 40 minutes later he came back and took it all back. Those 40 minutes have shaken me up pretty badly. I suffer anxiety when I feel like one of these push-aways is imminent but now I'm suffering because it happened and I'm terrified he's still on the verge of doing it again. How long till I can calm down again?
uk3s Posted September 17, 2012 Posted September 17, 2012 Been with a guy for 2 months and usually I can tell if a freak-out or strange behaviour is afoot but this came out of the blue. He had a big freak-out which started as we were going to bed and then continued as we woke up. He pretty much dumped me, walked out of the room to get ready for work. I stayed put, in shock and upset and then 40 minutes later he came back and took it all back. Those 40 minutes have shaken me up pretty badly. I suffer anxiety when I feel like one of these push-aways is imminent but now I'm suffering because it happened and I'm terrified he's still on the verge of doing it again. How long till I can calm down again? what preceeded this "freakout"??
Author True2form Posted September 17, 2012 Author Posted September 17, 2012 (edited) what preceeded this "freakout"?? When I questioned it apparently when we'd gone out last Saturday there were two moments where he felt uncomfortable in my presence and he just let that boil away for 3 or so days without saying anything. Sunday morning I developed a case of awful cystitis which I have suffered badly with in the past so by my reckoning the infection was already setting in on Sat night and making me react badly to alcohol. NB (edit) - I don't do anything too nuts on alcohol ever, don't start fights etc. But this time I was feeling really really sick I don't totally remember everything which is unusual. Unusually because he was helping out one of my friends I stayed for half a week at his house. I'm guessing the lack of space and me being a bit spaced out on antibiotics didn't help a bit - but I'm sad that he didn't just say something as the response would have been "I'm really sick, of course I'm acting strange you big sausage." Edited September 17, 2012 by True2form
todreaminblue Posted September 17, 2012 Posted September 17, 2012 Been with a guy for 2 months and usually I can tell if a freak-out or strange behaviour is afoot but this came out of the blue. He had a big freak-out which started as we were going to bed and then continued as we woke up. He pretty much dumped me, walked out of the room to get ready for work. I stayed put, in shock and upset and then 40 minutes later he came back and took it all back. Those 40 minutes have shaken me up pretty badly. I suffer anxiety when I feel like one of these push-aways is imminent but now I'm suffering because it happened and I'm terrified he's still on the verge of doing it again. How long till I can calm down again? i read your last post seems like you have calmed a bit since writing this.....I think everybody has freak outs explain to him that it made you feel pretty insecure and that instead of going the dump truck route......maybe go for a walk it seems 40 minutes is about enough time fro him to think straight....walking helps....let him know that dumping someone should be final and not a turn around thing......not fair at all would cause anyone insecurities....i am prone to freak outs but wouldn't dump someone if i were going out with them over it, unless there were existing issues of betrayal or distrust.....i would talk to them work it out feel like an idiot but an honest one in a relationship.....deb
Author True2form Posted September 17, 2012 Author Posted September 17, 2012 i read your last post seems like you have calmed a bit since writing this.....I think everybody has freak outs explain to him that it made you feel pretty insecure and that instead of going the dump truck route......maybe go for a walk it seems 40 minutes is about enough time fro him to think straight....walking helps....let him know that dumping someone should be final and not a turn around thing......not fair at all would cause anyone insecurities....i am prone to freak outs but wouldn't dump someone if i were going out with them over it, unless there were existing issues of betrayal or distrust.....i would talk to them work it out feel like an idiot but an honest one in a relationship.....deb Well, This happened last Weds/Thurs and then I went away for thursday day and Friday then last minute on Sat we decided to have a weekend away, just the two of us. During that it wasn't really brought up, it was established that I was wary of him and feeling uncomfortable to begin with, but I guess we felt like we'd said everything needed to be said in the moment when he took it back and now we're just seeing if we can move on. The weekend was great, right until the point where I was going home last night (Sunday night) suddenly my instincts kicked in and I felt vulnerable leaving him alone to his own devices and thoughts... I don't know if it's my anxiety or whether I'm picking up on something and that's why I'm suffering. I don't feel amazing to him anymore and that's really screwing my confidence.
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