belle21 Posted July 23, 2004 Posted July 23, 2004 Hey everyone..i am in real need of some advice..a bit of background is that i went out with this guy for nearly 2 years, then we broke up for a year (his doing, he wanted space, time to be on his own etc etc) after a year we got back together with him stating that he made a huge mistake letting me go..this only lasted 6 weeks before he dumped me again saying he didnt think he was in love with me. i was devastated. i really thought he was going to be the guy i would marry. its been 2 years since then and i havent dated anyone..havent thought of anyone but him and that doesnt look to be changing anytime soon. everyone keeps asking me why im single, ive had plenty of offers but my heart lies with him... we've been friends for the last year but there is still a sort of connection there that i cant describe or shake.. stupidly ive slept with him twice in the last 4 months..the first time we didnt speak of it again, the 2nd time (we were a bit drunk) he kept apologising and saying he knew there was so much unresolved between us, that he did care and he didnt think either of us had gotten over the other (for the record he hasnt dated anyone in the last 2 years either..) we havent spoken of that night again except for when we went out to lunch about a week after and he said he couldnt sleep with someone unless it meant something.. i dont know what to think anymore. im so tired of thinking he couldnt possibly want me or he would have done something about it by now..and he did say right before we had sex that he didnt want to go down the path of hurting me again... please someone tell me what to do! how do i confront him about it? i dont think i can face rejection again but i have to know whats going on..
unsafe Posted July 23, 2004 Posted July 23, 2004 I think that you should ask him where he stands in your life. Or where he wants to stand. If he really just wants to be friends, or if he thinks maybe in the future he could see you two together again? If he hasn't dated and you haven't dated then why aren't you together..and if he doesn't want that relationship back then why isn't he at least looking for someone else? no offense to you. But usually when you don't want one thing anymore you look for something else. Once you have been in love its hard to live with out love again. I am giving my ex a third chance right now. We were together for two years broke up because he well is dumb but was scared because we were planning on moving in together. Then 4 months later got back together for 3 months and he broke things off again saying he just doesn't think its going to work. He has doubts about us. And doesn't want to hurt me if it doesn't work out. So I moved on finally..met someone new fell hard for him and moved on. Then this guy broke it off with me because he was scared we got pretty serious..and then I was single again and then the ex started calling it had been only two months since we last broke up and said he made a horrible mistake I am the one and only and he wants to marry me with in the year...It has been hard to forgive and forget the pain He caused me. I had my heart set on marrying before. But things are really good now. I think you have to be strong and don't be scared of losing him. He should be scared of losing you. Look how much you love him where is he going to find that. Just tell him it can go either way you just need to know exactly so you can try to move on with the love part of your life if he doesn't want to be a part of it. Because I know where you are but seriously doesn't waist your time on someone who can't really give you himself. YOu deserve the best and don't settle for less. Don't let him have you all the heart, the friendship and the sex...if he can't love you and take care of you back the way you need him too. Its not worth it, its hard to imagine your life with out him. But if this is what life will be like with him you will find someone who will want to be with you and give you it all in return. Good luck be strong
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