TeodoraPTM Posted September 14, 2012 Posted September 14, 2012 Kind of a long story, so I'll try to make it as short as possible and I'll be abstract, for my own safety and privacy. This summer I had to learn something completely new and I had the chance to do it with a wonderful man, with whom I also fell in love, I guess, considering how I still feel about him, although we finished classes a few weeks ago and reminiscing how I felt and behave when I was around him daily. There's no chance or anything else for a relationship, he's married and much older than me (20 years) and I'm just not the type to do things like this, if you know what I mean. What I would really want to, though, is to remain as close friends as possible with him, because when I was around him, talking and learning, I felt like never before in my life, even physical aches passed without medication, just with his presence! I miss him a lot, too much to tell, but he's a very busy man, with lots of stuff to do and he always has other and other students: for each former one that he finishes with, there is a new one. I just want to be alone with him again and to talk like we used to, but I have like mental blockages when I get to see him and anyway, there are always other persons around and I can't say a thing. It would make me so much good if I could just chat with him, but again, what can I tell him, how and when, 'cause he's always very busy and I'm afraid not to sound desperate or begging or God knows what else. I don't want to let it go, I want to maintain kind of a special friendship with him, but would that be possible, and how in the world?! I'm burning on in the inside and nothing comes out on my mouth 'cause I can't seem to find a moment when he's not occupied or something else... There would be much more to say, but I hope you got my issue. You can ask questions for details, if you need them. P.S: Regarding the part where I said "he's a very busy man, with lots of stuff to do and he always has other and other students: for each former one that he finishes with, there is a new one", I would think "why not keep in touch with some of them, right? There isn't a necessity to just pass from one to another and then...nothing." We got on with each other very well and I know he's fond of me because I was a good student and he can clearly see the results of his work on me...But I need a little bit more than just "Hello, how do you do? Fine, you? etc...", 'cause that's what I get now...
TaraMaiden Posted September 14, 2012 Posted September 14, 2012 No. you must not keep in touch with him. This is disrespectful to his professionalism, and to his wife and marriage. Also, if you have deep feelings for someone, you cannot stay in touch as 'just friends' because you are lying to yourself. You don't want to keep in touch with him to just be friends. you want to keep in touch with him because you fancy him and want more. You connection with him sounds as if it might have had something to do with a therapy or personal development. It is very common for students to develop a crush on their teacher. If I am right, this is not unusual. he is probably used to it. leave him alone. Forget it.
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