Would it be rude to ask for a full body profile pic?

[SJC2008]

That's nice that you had a good time, even though she turned out to be not your type.

 

You said you don't want to date her, so why are you going to ask her out on another date? If you want to see her again, I hope you make it clear that you only want to be friends.

 

I didn't say I don't want to date her. I said had I seen a full pic I would of never went out with her. TBS I did enjoy myself and she is pretty so I'd go out with her again.

[LittlePrince]

I didn't say I don't want to date her. I said had I seen a full pic I would of never went out with her. TBS I did enjoy myself and she is pretty so I'd go out with her again.

You'd have to be Gumbi to limbo under the bar you set. Would chanting "How low can you go?" be adding it on a little too thick?

[CC12]

I didn't say I don't want to date her. I said had I seen a full pic I would of never went out with her. TBS I did enjoy myself and she is pretty so I'd go out with her again.

 

Oh, sorry, I guess I misunderstood. I read it as you saying, "I don't want to date a girl who is bigger than me and she is literally bigger than me." And I thought you were just trying to prove a point with the "where do you draw the line" stuff. But if you were really asking:

 

Is it shallow to not want to date someone bigger than you prefer? Generally, no, it's not, but since you met her and liked her, and she has some other attractive physical attributes, then not wanting to date her solely because she's bigger might be slightly shallow. Maybe. But you're allowed to be.

 

What's holding you back from being more excited about pursuing her? Is it that you're not that physically attracted to her? Or would you maybe be worried about what people might think of you, or something like that?

[oaks]

I didn't say I don't want to date her. I said had I seen a full pic I would of never went out with her. TBS I did enjoy myself and she is pretty so I'd go out with her again.

 

So you wouldn't have wanted to go on a date if you had seen, in advance, a full body pic... but you went on a date anyway and enjoyed her company and you want to go out with her again?

 

That's great news.

 

Also, sounds like a good example of why some people don't post photos, and why they shouldn't be dismissed for not doing so (even though dating sites are very photo-oriented).

[LittlePrince]

So you wouldn't have wanted to go on a date if you had seen, in advance, a full body pic... but you went on a date anyway and enjoyed her company and you want to go out with her again?

 

That's great news.

 

Also, sounds like a good example of why some people don't post photos, and why they shouldn't be dismissed for not doing so (even though dating sites are very photo-oriented).

So I should start a dating site that doesn't allow photos and name it Settling for Less?

[oaks]

So I should start a dating site that doesn't allow photos and name it Settling for Less?

 

The OP enjoyed his date. Don't be a dick.

[LittlePrince]

The OP enjoyed his date. Don't be a dick.

The OP is settling for what he thinks he can get but otherwise wouldn't date her and would rather date someone else.

[Disenchantedly Yours]

We met up and if she's a few extra pounds I should list myself as slender and I'm no light weight at 5'10" 220. OTOH she is very pretty and has a movie star rack. That being said if she had full pics I never would of went out with her. I know it sounds mean but like I said I'm not shooting for bikini girls and have no problems with women who are a little chunky but where do you draw the line? Am I shallow if I don't want to date a woman who is bigger than me proportionatley? What about literally? She literally has a bigger stomach than me IMO. I did have a good time so I'll ask her for another date and keep my options open as I'm messaging a few other women.

 

Well as long as she has a movie star rack that's what counts.

 

You shouldn't force yourself to date someone you feel like you have to make concessions for. You aren't doing her or you any favors.

 

Are you shallow for not wanting to date a woman who is bigger then you? I don't know. But you seem really hung up on her body more then anything else. At least you can sooth your eyes with her movie star rack.

 

Remember, she isn't really a person. She's just a woman you are going to bang so her body better be good right?

 

This is why porn screws men up.

[Emilia]

The OP enjoyed his date. Don't be a dick.

 

I don't think that particular poster is capable of not being a dick

[oaks]

I don't think that particular poster is capable of not being a dick

 

I live in hope.

[oaks]

This is why porn screws men up.

 

Wait...

 

The woman is "pretty" and has a "movie star rack" and the OP enjoyed meeting her.

 

Where's the porn angle coming from?

[LittlePrince]

This is why porn screws men up.

It is all that porn's fault. Nasty stuff that porn.

[irc333]

So you wouldn't have wanted to go on a date if you had seen, in advance, a full body pic... but you went on a date anyway and enjoyed her company and you want to go out with her again?

 

That's great news.

 

Also, sounds like a good example of why some people don't post photos, and why they shouldn't be dismissed for not doing so (even though dating sites are very photo-oriented).

 

 

True....I know a lot of women that a billion times, "No picture no reply!!"

 

Some demand even multiple pictures in a profile. Some even set the criteria of what kind of pictures they should be.

 

They should be pics without sunglasses and/or hats. (Kind of makes sense).

 

A while back, when dating sites were free...there was this woman that had only a headshot, she lived very local....and I was trying to get her to reveal to me the description of the rest of her body, she was a bit stand-offish about it...but met her anyways, because she was only a few mins drive away.

 

Turns out she probably weighed almost twice as I did when I saw her in person. She was 5'10", so I figured be not THAT obese, but she was.

[LittlePrince]

True....I know a lot of women that a billion times, "No picture no reply!!"

 

Some demand even multiple pictures in a profile. Some even set the criteria of what kind of pictures they should be.

 

They should be pics without sunglasses and/or hats. (Kind of makes sense).

 

A while back, when dating sites were free...there was this woman that had only a headshot, she lived very local....and I was trying to get her to reveal to me the description of the rest of her body, she was a bit stand-offish about it...but met her anyways, because she was only a few mins drive away.

 

Turns out she probably weighed almost twice as I did when I saw her in person. She was 5'10", so I figured be not THAT obese, but she was.

I guess Jenny Craig only pushed all the fat in her face down in time for her online photo op.

[SJC2008]

Well as long as she has a movie star rack that's what counts.

 

You shouldn't force yourself to date someone you feel like you have to make concessions for. You aren't doing her or you any favors.

 

Are you shallow for not wanting to date a woman who is bigger then you? I don't know. But you seem really hung up on her body more then anything else. At least you can sooth your eyes with her movie star rack.

 

Remember, she isn't really a person. She's just a woman you are going to bang so her body better be good right?

 

This is why porn screws men up.

 

What's wrong with saying I like her breasts? Those were details for the guys so if it's too R rated for you change the station. She's not some person I'm going to bang I don't use women. See my trying not to be shallow thread, this girl is a lot bigger than her.

 

This is what porn does to men lol. This is what OLD does to men is more like it.

[ThaWholigan]

Well as long as she has a movie star rack that's what counts.

 

You shouldn't force yourself to date someone you feel like you have to make concessions for. You aren't doing her or you any favors.

 

Are you shallow for not wanting to date a woman who is bigger then you? I don't know. But you seem really hung up on her body more then anything else. At least you can sooth your eyes with her movie star rack.

 

Remember, she isn't really a person. She's just a woman you are going to bang so her body better be good right?

 

This is why porn screws men up.

You know, I like you DY, and I stick up for you more often than not. But I have no idea where this came from and I'm not sure that this is an adequate summary of this particular scenario. OP enjoyed himself - even though he admitted that he wouldn't have dated her had he seen a pic. Surely he is revising his stance? Why did it warrant a post like that?

 

.

[ThaWholigan]

What's wrong with saying I like her breasts? Those were details for the guys so if it's too R rated for you change the station. She's not some person I'm going to bang I don't use women. See my trying not to be shallow thread, this girl is a lot bigger than her.

 

This is what porn does to men lol. This is what OLD does to men is more like it.

I remember that thread.

 

I think you have probably come quite a way since then, and you have admitted that you enjoyed yourself with this woman. Which shows that there must be some chemistry there. Maybe you could build on that with this woman? She seems nice, and you have had great convos online with each other. So I say go for it .

[SmileFace]

What I don't understand is that you said if you had seen her prior you wouldn't have went on the date but you have seen her and are going on a next date - yet you are keeping your options open... are you just leading her on? I don't believe that your physical requirements have just went out the window so why a next date?

[ThaWholigan]

What I don't understand is that you said if you had seen her prior you wouldn't have went on the date but you have seen her and are going on a next date - yet you are keeping your options open... are you just leading her on? I don't believe that your physical requirements have just went out the window so why a next date?

I have had the same reservations due to one of the very few meetups I had from OLD - no pic, but we got on. When I met her, there was no attraction there. We parted ways amicably, but I don't think we were ever going to continue from that point. I wonder how she is though? She was quite a nice girl if I remember.....

 

It might not be the same for everyone. Maybe he really does have some attraction for this girl, even though she's quite big. I think he should probably admit that he's keeping his options open to be honest though.

[SmileFace]

I have had the same reservations due to one of the very few meetups I had from OLD - no pic, but we got on. When I met her, there was no attraction there. We parted ways amicably, but I don't think we were ever going to continue from that point. I wonder how she is though? She was quite a nice girl if I remember.....

 

It might not be the same for everyone. Maybe he really does have some attraction for this girl, even though she's quite big. I think he should probably admit that he's keeping his options open to be honest though.

 

I have done OLDing and met guys who when I seen in person I know I wasn't attracted to them. I have went on several outtings with them since they are good people but I wouldn't let them think we are dating. When of my coolest guy friends I met on OKC.

 

I mean just don't ask her on a next date if that isn't you intention.

[Oxy Moronovich]

We met up and if she's a few extra pounds I should list myself as slender and I'm no light weight at 5'10" 220. OTOH she is very pretty and has a movie star rack. That being said if she had full pics I never would of went out with her. I know it sounds mean but like I said I'm not shooting for bikini girls and have no problems with women who are a little chunky but where do you draw the line? Am I shallow if I don't want to date a woman who is bigger than me proportionatley? What about literally? She literally has a bigger stomach than me IMO. I did have a good time so I'll ask her for another date and keep my options open as I'm messaging a few other women.

Looks like you've learned something new: if a chick doesn't have good pics that shows off her figure, don't bother with her. Most men who do OLD skip profiles where there aren't good body shots. I'm thinking the reason why she messaged you is because most men ignored her.

 

Plus, don't bother going out on a second date with this broad. It's just a waste of your time.

[sweetheart5381]

So you wouldn't have wanted to go on a date if you had seen, in advance, a full body pic... but you went on a date anyway and enjoyed her company and you want to go out with her again?

 

That's great news.

 

Also, sounds like a good example of why some people don't post photos, and why they shouldn't be dismissed for not doing so (even though dating sites are very photo-oriented).

 

I once posted body pics, thinking I should "be honest" about how I looked, all of me. I never once thought I was hot, or had a great body, I have 3 kids for goodness sake.

 

I was inundated with men looking for nothing but sex, but appearing to want a relationship.

 

I was used, over and over and all I ever tried to do was be myself.

 

Then I learned that OLD is all about getting laid - for a very small proportion maybe there is some thought of actually having a healthy relationship, even if that is only casual on a mutual basis. For the most part it is purely a game.

 

A game I now choose not to play.

[Disenchantedly Yours]

Wait...

 

The woman is "pretty" and has a "movie star rack" and the OP enjoyed meeting her.

 

Where's the porn angle coming from?

 

Because he talked about how he wouldn't have gone for her if he met her in real life and even now, he doesn't really believe she is good enough for him.

[Disenchantedly Yours]

What's wrong with saying I like her breasts? Those were details for the guys so if it's too R rated for you change the station. She's not some person I'm going to bang I don't use women. See my trying not to be shallow thread, this girl is a lot bigger than her.

 

This is what porn does to men lol. This is what OLD does to men is more like it.

 

Because if the women of LS went around saying stuff like, "I really liked his big wallet and how much cash he made", there would be plenty of men that would take issue with her making specific mention of this feature. But because it's okay to evaluate and rate women based on body parts, not real people, this behavior is okay. So yes, please go on talking about how great her rak is and how pretty she is but how she still isn't good enough for you.

 

And yes, this is what porn does to guys and media in general. Too many men become shills for popular male entertainment avenues. Which is why it's so popular to rate women on scales from 1-10 instead of seeing them as people first. Yes yes..i Know..women do it too right? Sometimes .But it doesn't seem like women do it as much as men.

 

Do this girl a favor and let her be with a guy that really likes all of her. Not just specific parts of her body that you are either giving a thumbs up for or a thumbs down for.

[Disenchantedly Yours]

You know, I like you DY, and I stick up for you more often than not. But I have no idea where this came from and I'm not sure that this is an adequate summary of this particular scenario. OP enjoyed himself - even though he admitted that he wouldn't have dated her had he seen a pic. Surely he is revising his stance? Why did it warrant a post like that?

 

.

 

Because he is clearly on the fence about the whole thing. He wouldn't have given her a shot if it wasn't for online dating. Lots of people miss good oppurtunities because of their more shallow judgements.

 

She doesn't have the body he most wants in a woman. Be damned that he gets along with her. But hey, at least her breasts are good. That's what really counts after all. Oh I know I know...men are "visual"...men need something "visual". So what if he is judging her breasts like a pair of finely grown pumpkins entered into the anual local town Octoberfest fair, it's all good right? Lets see the score her breasts invoked..a 7? 8? 9? 10? lets see how many numbers men can come up with to catalog women. Yay! Because we all know men are allowed to judge and treat women like that right? Oh no DY, you are just being silly. Men love women for their insides too! This makes you guys so perfect and wonderful even as you judge and put actual rating numbers on women and their individual body parts like they were blow up dolls and not real people.

 

I know no guy will actually come out and say that in so many words but that's the basic gest of what goes down on here among guys and I see it way too often. I know my post will put some men's backs up while ignoring the truth in my posts and how they take women apart for their body parts yet still want to be recongnized as 'good guys" that really appreciate women for who they are. Sorry guys but you can't have it both ways. You can't talk about how you aren't shallow but only ever talk about women's bodies and how you don't or do want to date wome nbased on her indivudal body parts liek she isn't a whole person.