It always feels so good when the ex's friends are on your side.

[lovehurts5]

Just ran into my ex's 2 best friends, gave them a hug hello and then went on my way. One of them came up to me a few minutes later, went on to say how beautiful I am, how dumb my ex is, and how I am going to do just fine. It's just nice when the people you'd think would be against you are really on your side.

[RogerWallace111]

assuming this is a male, he's probably trying to plant a seed/open a door to hooking up with you in the future. thinking maybe you'll run into eachother out, drunk or something, and you'll remember him as the sweet, caring guy who was nice to you when you expected him not to be. I've seen my own friends do it to eachother, and to me a few times. Being the hug-giving, shoulder to cry on after a fight, breakup, or when he mistreats her in some way. In fact if I were your ex, and found out one of my buddies was telling you you were beautiful, and you'd be just fine without me, I would never feel the same love for him again and possibly just stop associating with him.

[RogerWallace111]

if these were female friends of his, then yeah, them acknowledging that was probably completely genuine. and would be nice to hear as reassurance that even his own friends can see things for what they are.

 

 

but it's very rare that a guy will compliment a girls looks without some at least slightly flirtatious motive. unless it's a longtime platonic friend. or family member

[lovehurts5]

I'd see where you'd feel that way but in this case, its his very best friend and I don't see him feeling that way about me or doing that to my ex. He knows I would do NOTHING with him. I really just think he sees my ex as an idiot for hurting me and kicking me to the curb.

[RogerWallace111]

I really don't mean this in any douchebag way, and I'm not saying you're naive or anything, cause from your perspective I'm sure it appears exactly as you're saying but... That's about the most classic response I could imagine a female having in this situation. Whether or not there's truth to it. Unless the friend is acting really obviously creepy, or a known "player", probably 9 out of 10 girls would insist "they're best friends, he's not into me like that, he knows I'd never hook up with him- he just knows what my ex did was stupid". Just cause he doesn't think it would happen doesn't mean he won't throw the compliment out for the hell of it, just in case (I don't mean he's consciously calculating things and contemplating the possibility, but just kinda doin' it).

 

Girls always seem to err on the trusting side with guys they consider friends... But the truth is, a guy will almost always f*ck a female "friend" given the opportunity. Girls don't think this way, can't relate, and thus don't realize it. Physical appearance is the only real requisite for a male to be sexually attracted to a woman. Women usually need more. I have respect for and value all my friendships with the females in my life. But, with the one's I'm attracted to, I would not stop their advance because "we're just friends!" Unless she were one of my very best buds and I knew it would destroy a friendship I truly cherished.

 

If he hadn't told you you were "beautiful" it'd be one thing. Even if it doesn't mean there's any other motive, that alone makes him a bitchass friend to your ex, in my eyes. A way better thing to say would be along the lines of "Yeah, I don't know what he was thinking. You were really good for him. But I'm sure you'll be alright." Omitting the physical compliments.

 

During a breakup with my ex, I remember one of her supposed "best" friends telling me I was better off, that she was just "bound to hurt me", and that I could find a cooler girl. It fully affirmed what I already knew about the phony-ass nature of their "friendship".

[RogerWallace111]

I actually just drove with my friends girl 45 minutes to a party, during which she told me she'd found out that day that he'd been cheating on her. I watched my conduct from the moment she revealed this to me as if he were listening in, cause that's the type of respect I'd like him to have for me should the tables be turned. I was understanding, tried to make her feel better with very neutral "wisdom", but knew I would never want my buddy, in that situation, to be giving her the "oh, that's so ****ed up. i can't believe he'd do that to you, you deserve so much better" routine. Much less throw in that I found her beautiful (which she is, sure enough).