A thank you to everyone on this site

[ProjectSiK]

How's it going everyone? I'm here writing this feeling relieved, feeling good and all in all - looking forward to what the future holds for me. I'm able to say this because of the great people here who have offered their hope, support and advice. For that, I would like to thank you.

 

I won't go over my entire story regarding what happened with my ex, I will say it was a four year relationship and it randomly ended out of the blue with no signs of it coming at all. Needless to say, I was a wreck. I lost all of the friends I met through her. Few came around to see how I was doing but it wasn't the same. Deep down I knew those friendships have died along with my relationship which was very hard to accept because I never thought that I would lose so much from one incident.

 

Without this site, I think I would have gone crazy. I needed someone to talk to, someone to vent to, express my disgust and heartache in an attempt to understand exactly what happened and why it happened. Although a lot of the replies I received weren't always exactly what I wanted to hear, every single post opened my eyes ever so slightly. Every post from people here with similar situations allowed me to gain solace in knowing that I wasn't alone. You're all straight-forward and for that, I am thankful because when this break-up occurred, I had no one except immediate family and I didn't want to include them in my pain for whatever reason.

 

I sit here writing this a new man with new outlooks on life. That's a lot to say because I was in a very dark place for the past two months, contemplating ways to get her back in my life. I'm happy to say that's no longer the case. I've accepted that it's over, I've accepted that she is on to dating people again, I've accepted that I will never have that "US" again. I am also proud to say that I've accepted she was always hold a place in my heart, maybe not romantically but apart from being my lover, she was my best friend. I would still be there for her if she really, truly needed it and it wouldn't take a toll on how I feel right now. I don't know, I'm just happy that she's happy because that's all that matters in the end.

 

I will do my best to offer advice to some of you who are experiencing the end of a long term relationship:

 

 

• Never blame yourself. You've gotta realize that you are who you are, sure you may have some faults but in the end, you are an awesome person and you should never let yourself forget that.
  
• This may sound silly to some of you but... look for positives that came from this break-up. In my case, I reconciled with a few old friends that I lost contact with over petty things when I was young. Now we are living it up and having a great time. Everyone is different but I guarantee there is something GOOD that happened because of your loss.
  
• Use that free time to come up with a new hobby, get a new job, take advantage of life and all that it offers. It's too short to put yourself down when you could be out exploring and expanding your horizons.
  
• Communicate with those around you and those here.
  
• ACCEPT. This is crucial. If you don't actually ever accept the break-up you never go on the road to healing.
  

 

 

I know it's not the best but that's some of the things I've done and realized and that's what helped me get through this along with this site. I wish all of you the best of luck and always know that there is someone out there who will realize that you're worth it and you're worth FIGHTING FOR. The road may be long and hard but in these situations there's always a light at the end of the tunnel. Thanks LS for helping me realize that!