canuckprincess Posted September 18, 2012 Posted September 18, 2012 She never knew. Id tell her stuff like had to work late, going to a meeting, playing ball with pals, you know.If she'd known she'd of kicked me out before instead of not till my gf send her the evidents. She trusted me too much but yeah its best this way now. You said in an earlier post that you went underground for 6 months, so your wife knew about the affair why didn't she kick you out when she first found out? So how long after your gf sent the proof was your wife able to more on? Most woman aren't as strong as what your xw may have been. Maybe she was having an affair of her own and that's why she's finally happy. I'm curious as to whether your wife would of taken the news better coming from you then the gf.
obladi Posted September 19, 2012 Posted September 19, 2012 You said in an earlier post that you went underground for 6 months, so your wife knew about the affair why didn't she kick you out when she first found out? So how long after your gf sent the proof was your wife able to more on? Most woman aren't as strong as what your xw may have been. Maybe she was having an affair of her own and that's why she's finally happy. I'm curious as to whether your wife would of taken the news better coming from you then the gf. Exw didnt know we nevr stopped. I was trying to keep a lid on everything till my gf send her that stuff. Doubt the ex had an OM since shes still single now but who knows she says shes happier now than she was with me!Id be mad but I'm happier than I was with her too so so what. If gf never sent her stuff we'd never knowc ause I likely never done it on my own. I love my gf! 1
2sure Posted September 19, 2012 Posted September 19, 2012 My thoughts on this are that people get divorced a lot, so many marriages have the eventual potential for ending. My personal experiences have shown me that when one affair ends, another begins...so that certainly increases the potential for Ddays and divorce. If there is no Dday ever...whatever issue there is within the marriage or with the WS will never have the opportunity to come to light and be resolved. So, even if an affair ends, the issue is still there and can likely lead to divorce. I definitely know people who have divorced and married their affair partner. I definitely know people who ended up divorced due to infidelity and the WS stopped pursuing a relationship with the affair partner. ( I also know OW who dumped MM when he got divorced!) Interestingly enough...After our Divorce my exH failed to tell several of his "special friends" that he was a free man. 1
half_ofa_heart Posted September 19, 2012 Posted September 19, 2012 If there is no Dday ever...whatever issue there is within the marriage or with the WS will never have the opportunity to come to light and be resolved. So, even if an affair ends, the issue is still there and can likely lead to divorce. I have wondered about this for many months... Doesn't this depend on the person? I believe my XMM can compartmentalize therefore in his mind, he can pretend the A never happened. However, subconsciously he does know and realizes he doesn't have what it takes to either face the problems in his marriage or to leave therefore accepting the marriage as it stands as good enough. like in every case... it all depends I guess
2sure Posted September 19, 2012 Posted September 19, 2012 I have wondered about this for many months... Doesn't this depend on the person? I believe my XMM can compartmentalize therefore in his mind, he can pretend the A never happened. However, subconsciously he does know and realizes he doesn't have what it takes to either face the problems in his marriage or to leave therefore accepting the marriage as it stands as good enough. like in every case... it all depends I guess Well you know, in my opinion...some people cheat not because they are unhappy but because they just want More. That was my experience both as OW and later as a BS. I guess for people like that, with no DDay, they could stay married forever . Yuck.
Recommended Posts