The_Face Posted September 12, 2012 Posted September 12, 2012 ...Turns out she was just throwing me breadcrumbs. We had sex a number of times, and looking back I now realize the only times we've had sex since our breakup is after an argument where we decided not to see eachother anymore. When things are "going good" there's nothing there. Last night she couldn't even muster the words "I love you" when I finally wanted some sort of definition to our relationship, and where we were headed. Sex is great and all, but if she doesn't even love me anymore, I'm done playing this game. I feel like a damn yo-yo. If occasional sex is all there is, I'm done with it. Call me crazy, but it's really not worth the effort I've been putting in. In some ways though, I feel good right now. I'm no longer clinging to this hopeful feeling that we may be getting back together. In fact, if we were to start going that route at all, I think I'd just have to turn the other way after all of this. Our relationship at this point is the emotional equivalent of riding a bike with one flat tire. It's getting me nowhere, and I'm working twice as hard to keep moving forward.
Exit Posted September 12, 2012 Posted September 12, 2012 Doing all the work is never fun. Meaningless sex with someone who can't even say they love you certainly isn't worth it. 1
youngnlove89 Posted September 12, 2012 Posted September 12, 2012 I'm in the same position as you with my ex-boyfriend. I try, try, try. But I gon't get anything in return. We hang out, he calls me everyday, we have sex, kiss, hold hands, laugh, talk... He thinks there is something else out there for him though. He loves me. He cares for me. But he still thinks I am not the one. I told him on Sunday this has to end on, that we can't continue doing this forever. That we need to go our seperate ways now and I can't play his games anymore. I thought he might fight for me, but instead he watched me walk away. It hurts. Trust me I know. But so far it's the 3rd day of NC and I'm okay. If he wants to contact me he knows it better be because he wants me back. 1
Author The_Face Posted September 12, 2012 Author Posted September 12, 2012 I'm in the same position as you with my ex-boyfriend. I try, try, try. But I gon't get anything in return. We hang out, he calls me everyday, we have sex, kiss, hold hands, laugh, talk... He thinks there is something else out there for him though. He loves me. He cares for me. But he still thinks I am not the one. I told him on Sunday this has to end on, that we can't continue doing this forever. That we need to go our seperate ways now and I can't play his games anymore. I thought he might fight for me, but instead he watched me walk away. It hurts. Trust me I know. But so far it's the 3rd day of NC and I'm okay. If he wants to contact me he knows it better be because he wants me back. Does it feel like you're just being kept on the back-burner? Someone to fall back on if and when he doesn't find anybody else? I have felt like I'm on the backburner for the past 3 months, but for whatever reason, I've let it be. Thinking that enough time spent together having good times, improving myself as a person, would bring her back to me in the way we used to be. How much longer can we keep ourselves in this position? My ex still needs time to figure things out, and "doesn't want to rush back into things", but we've been doing this back and forth thing for months now. It's just my opinion, but to me, true love doesn't need "time to figure things out". That's just another way of saying "seeing what else is out there while we continue to have sex and I take full advantage of your love". I'm over it at this point. I'm almost looking forward to the next time she tries to make a move on me, so I can show her that she's not holding all the cards anymore. I'm not going to let her use sex as a way of keeping me at arm's length with her. We should both drop our ex's, for good, Youngnlove89.
Drseussgrrl Posted September 12, 2012 Posted September 12, 2012 You both are doing this to yourselves. The only way either of your exes are going to have any sort of respect for you is when you cut them off cold. But you just hang around accepting scraps of attention and having sex with people who don't give a rip about you. Sad.
youngnlove89 Posted September 12, 2012 Posted September 12, 2012 I dropped my ex for good on Sunday. We can be eachothers support. It is hard. Everyday is hard. I miss him right now. But I keep reminding myself I deserve better! I deserve more than to be just a sex toy. He will miss me because he got everything he wanted. I won't miss him because I got nothing from him to miss.
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