veggirl Posted September 12, 2012 Posted September 12, 2012 Honey send him a message and ask if you can talk to him. It was 5 years, an actual break up talk-if that's what it becomes-is worth the effort of at least asking. Don't be dramatic, just ask. You will have your answer. 1
Am313 Posted September 12, 2012 Posted September 12, 2012 I dont know if that's has been said, but it seems pretty obvious to me: you're already assuming the worst, but is the worst that can happen? Reach out and make contact. I promise you, if you're doing this out of pride you will never be in a happy relationship. Relationships are the one place where you put pride aside. Remember, he called you in response to your message, and you ignored him. You withdrew from him. He's probably hurt just like you, feels abandoned just like you. Call him. Like yesterday. Put your foolish pride aside. 1
Author ponette Posted September 12, 2012 Author Posted September 12, 2012 he sent me an email about a message my work had left on his machine. not me. no, i never acknowledged it; i could've said 'ok, thanks' like a normal person but was still too pissed off. ...and yeah, i know i'm a stanky lil donkey.
Tally123 Posted September 12, 2012 Posted September 12, 2012 Ponette! I have just been reading your thread and I am agreeing with the masses here....essentially you're the one that walked away, withdrew and then didn acknowledge the message he left. He's probably been feeling a whole bag of **** to be honest! I really think you should message him or email him. This was five years of both of your lives...don't both of you deserve this to have finished properly and doesn't he deserve that if you have walked away from him? You dont want to be years down the line and regret not saying what you wanted to and wishing you never let your pride get in the way. Good Luck! Tally
Author ponette Posted September 12, 2012 Author Posted September 12, 2012 guys-seriously. he didn't call me, he only emailed me, and the purpose of his email was to let me know that my work had left me a message. yes, i never responded to that email he sent, because i waas still pissed. his email didn't even say anything like 'how're you doing?'- just 'you need to contact ms. so-and-so about making your vaccination appt'. that was it. was that really an attempt at conversation on his part?
Author ponette Posted September 12, 2012 Author Posted September 12, 2012 i'm spinning here. i know *i* initially withdrew and didn't respond to his nothing email, but i keep going back to if this man gave a damn about me, he would have said something by now. help. uugghh.
Crila16 Posted September 12, 2012 Posted September 12, 2012 If the guy really wanted to communicate with you and be with you, he would have done so. You're overanalysing and it's really simple. He contacted you to let you know your work had called. If your work hadn't called and left a message...you would never have heard from him. If he wanted to talk to you, he would have asked how you were doing. He was being responsible and considerate by letting you know he got a call for you and didn't want you to miss it. I would have done the same thing for my ex if he was someone I really cared about. That's it. That's all it was. Stop reading into it. There is absolutely no need to respond or call him back. You're driving yourself crazy trying to decode his message...and there's nothing to decode. You have to let it go until he gives you something solid.
Author ponette Posted September 13, 2012 Author Posted September 13, 2012 If the guy really wanted to communicate with you and be with you, he would have done so. You're overanalysing and it's really simple. He contacted you to let you know your work had called. If your work hadn't called and left a message...you would never have heard from him. If he wanted to talk to you, he would have asked how you were doing. He was being responsible and considerate by letting you know he got a call for you and didn't want you to miss it. I would have done the same thing for my ex if he was someone I really cared about. That's it. That's all it was. Stop reading into it. There is absolutely no need to respond or call him back. You're driving yourself crazy trying to decode his message...and there's nothing to decode. You have to let it go until he gives you something solid. that communication came 2 days after i got upset with him, so i don't know that 'if work had never called, i'd never have heard anything'. i think your caveat about overanalysis and jumping to conclusions is one you yourself should coonsider, since, without having any evidence, decided my ex was involved with a third party. the point of my post was that, based on the fact that he was last to contact, perhaps *i* should get in touch. i'm the jerk who withdrew and went silent, as i have in the past. i don't know; i go back and forth. if he relayed the message only because he's 'responsible and considerate', then there's no reason why he wouldn't let me know we were done, either in writing or in person, because that's the responsible and considerate thing to do. so let's be consistent in application of logic. i think he expected to hear from me, and when he did not, he said 'enough of this horsesh*t'. when she can pull her head out of her butt, she can call ME. this leaves the door open, i think, and i'm trying to figure out if i buck up and contact him, or if i admit that all hope is lost and let him go. one month is fresh out the door. maybe i'm not ready. maybe he isn't either.
Recommended Posts