Hawkeye2424 Posted September 9, 2012 Posted September 9, 2012 So I've been in NC with my ex for a few weeks minus one slip up. He has his new girlfriend and says he's in love. Now I find out they're moving in together and getting married. I'm heartbroken but decided to take charge and try to move on. Its been a huge failure so far. I went out with a guy last night and ended up leaving and crying in my car because he's not my ex. I miss him so much and I'd give anything to just see him again. I won't break NC but it just doesn't seem like he misses me at all. He has this whole new life with someone else and I can't make it thru one date. I feel like a headcase. Any advice on how to help me push thru this?
TaraMaiden Posted September 9, 2012 Posted September 9, 2012 Shift the focus onto you. Every time you start the snowball story of thinking about him, and letting it avalanche into a whole series of "woe-is-me" thought-sequences, Stop. Ask yourself: "What good is this actually doing me?" The answer will come: "Phukk-all. So then you ask - "So - why am I actually deliberately thinking about things that only serve to sabotage my progress?" When you reply to that - let me know. we'll take it from there. That will be £35.00 please. 2
megan43 Posted September 9, 2012 Posted September 9, 2012 Awe I'm so sorry for what u going threw and its Ok for u to be hurt ne body would. How long has it been since u guys parted??
ponette Posted September 9, 2012 Posted September 9, 2012 you are NOT a headcase. this is so hard, i know. HE is a headcase if you've been broken up for a couple of weeks and he's planning on marrying somebody else. do you think that will last? come on. stay strong and in control and don't contact this jackass.
Author Hawkeye2424 Posted September 9, 2012 Author Posted September 9, 2012 2 months but only 3 weeks since we stopped trying to fix things...that's when he decided to date her. I'm trying to stay positive but it's so hard some days...I hate feeling miserable and knowing he's happy with someone else. I'm trying to do things for me and move on but it's not there just yet
ponette Posted September 9, 2012 Posted September 9, 2012 you are doing well. you had the courage to go out on a date with a NEW guy. i'm impressed. we have to stay focused on ourselves because that is the only way through this. i've been with mine for 5 years, we haven't even had a proper breakup, and we haven't spoken in a month. i feel erased, invisible. you don't think it's a bit of a red flag that he's 2 mos out of a relationship and he's talking about moving in and marrying somebody else? that's crazy, and even if he's not bsing, it'll NEVER last. chin up. i know it's awful. we can do it.
TaraMaiden Posted September 9, 2012 Posted September 9, 2012 2 months but only 3 weeks since we stopped trying to fix things...that's when he decided to date her. I'm trying to stay positive but it's so hard some days...I hate feeling miserable and knowing he's happy with someone else. I'm trying to do things for me and move on but it's not there just yet Understand that what happened, is on his shoulders. All and every single re-play - is on yours. You can't let him live rent-free in your head. That's what they say, and it's true. For someone to be on your mind, they have to deserve your time. 1
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