MW93i Posted September 9, 2012 Posted September 9, 2012 Since me and my ex broke it off. She still has things of mine and I told her to contact me a time in which she is free so I can pick up my stuff. It's just a few simple things like clothes, my ds and stuff. It will litrially take no longer than 5 minutes for me to drive down get my stuff then go. It's been nearly 5 days since I told her to contact me about it and I'm getting very impatient waiting about, I just want my stuff back and get on the road of moving on with no attachments. Why hasn't she contact me? I don't want to break NC but if I have too tomorrow I will text her telling her I am coming for my things. Do you's think it's a good idea or should I still wait?
JSJS Posted September 9, 2012 Posted September 9, 2012 Do you have a friend who could contact her and get them for you? That way you stay out of contact but you get your things back.
Author MW93i Posted September 9, 2012 Author Posted September 9, 2012 Do you have a friend who could contact her and get them for you? That way you stay out of contact but you get your things back. I don't really mind going and getting my things, nothing shall be said between us. I just don't understand why shes putting it of.
JSJS Posted September 9, 2012 Posted September 9, 2012 You put the ball back in her court by telling her to contact you when she is free. She knows this and the next move is hers. If you know when she is free - straight after work etc. you could knock the door and ask for it back or ask a friend to contact her for you. Do you want to actually meet her?
Author MW93i Posted September 9, 2012 Author Posted September 9, 2012 You put the ball back in her court by telling her to contact you when she is free. She knows this and the next move is hers. If you know when she is free - straight after work etc. you could knock the door and ask for it back or ask a friend to contact her for you. Do you want to actually meet her? Yeah, I do realise that was a mistake. The thing is she just started education again so I have no idea what her planner/times are. If I text her saying 'I'm coming at 6 for my things' she will more than likely say something along the lines of 'I'm out' like she did 5 days ago. I don't know how I feel on that part a part of me wants to be civil and actually turn up for my things by myself and another part of me just wants to tell a friend to do it for me. I do plan on getting my things with a friend anyways just for support.
JSJS Posted September 9, 2012 Posted September 9, 2012 I didn't mean it was a mistake - sorry if I seemed judgemental. It's amazing how I can see things so clearly for others but never for myself It really depends on what you want - you are entitled to ask for your stuff back and taking a friend is a good idea if you want to keep it short and to the point. I think she may know this is getting to you since very few people wouldn't have 5 minutes to accept a visitor.
Author MW93i Posted September 9, 2012 Author Posted September 9, 2012 I didn't mean it was a mistake - sorry if I seemed judgemental. It's amazing how I can see things so clearly for others but never for myself It really depends on what you want - you are entitled to ask for your stuff back and taking a friend is a good idea if you want to keep it short and to the point. I think she may know this is getting to you since very few people wouldn't have 5 minutes to accept a visitor. Nono, it's alright! . It was a mistake I realised that when she blew me off getting my things 5 days ago. It just made me think 'shes in control of this situation' How do you mean? :S
JSJS Posted September 9, 2012 Posted September 9, 2012 She's still in control by making you wait for her to have a free 5 minutes. Most people can find 5 minutes in their schedule but as soon as she gives you your stuff back that's one less piece of control.
Author MW93i Posted September 9, 2012 Author Posted September 9, 2012 She's still in control by making you wait for her to have a free 5 minutes. Most people can find 5 minutes in their schedule but as soon as she gives you your stuff back that's one less piece of control. These are exactly my thoughts.. This will also be the last piece of control she has over me. How do you think I should go about it then?
JSJS Posted September 9, 2012 Posted September 9, 2012 I'm clearly no expert on this but it depends what you want. To maintain no contact - If you have a friend she also knows I would ask them to call her until she answers and arrange a time they can collect your stuff. This keeps you out of it, you don't have to plead for 5 minutes of her time and you don't have to speak to her since they will collect your stuff. Friends who would do this for you are worth having in your life BTW. To break contact - Send texts or call to arrange a time. If she does reply arrange a time for you and/or your friend to collect your stuff. Be polite and to the point when you visit her. If she doesn't reply there is a good chance you'll feel bad again. This is tough I know and ultimately you need to do what's right for you. Do you want a reconciliation?
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