The_Face Posted September 8, 2012 Posted September 8, 2012 Broke up with my ex a couple months ago. She says she doesn't know if she wants to get back together, she doesn't know if she is ready for it yet. Problem is, we still sleep together and occasional "I love yous" and she is willing to live with me still, but again, not ready for a relationship. How do I get her to figure it out? Seems like I'm involved in a NSA relationship, sort of. I still have feelings for her though and I honestly don't know anymore what she feels.
soccerrprp Posted September 8, 2012 Posted September 8, 2012 What??? Do you think she's using you? I mean, she has sex with you and says a few "I love yous" and you allow her to live with you??? Do you think maybe she's appeasing you, so that she can remain in your house/apt.? I mean, it sounds like you're having a relationship now. Is she seeing other guys? Looking around? 1
Author The_Face Posted September 8, 2012 Author Posted September 8, 2012 Hard to say if she's seeing other guys. She doesn't actually live with me right now, but she stays here off and on for a few days at a time. It's wierd. Part of me wants to bring up the whole "us" talk, and find out where we're at, to get some clarity, but the other part thinks she'll just get all flustered and act like she can't rush into making a decision. But we've been playing this game for the past 3 months now, I think it's getting pretty close to time to know what you want out of this, you know? How much time do you need to find out how you feel about us. Maybe I am being used in some way, but when she's telling me sweet things and we're being intimate she's pretty convincing that she likes me still. As far as I know she's not looking around at all, but then again, when she's not around I don't really know. Technically we're not "together" so that kind of gives her free reign to look around if she wanted to.
Author The_Face Posted September 8, 2012 Author Posted September 8, 2012 Should I just ask her right now, if she wants to work on us and be my girlfriend again? I'm kind of growing impatient with this, and I agree that it feels like we are already in a relationship.
lil hoodlum Posted September 8, 2012 Posted September 8, 2012 She is on the fence! It seems like it is time for you to knock her @$$ off of the fence! 2
Author The_Face Posted September 9, 2012 Author Posted September 9, 2012 She is on the fence, for sure. I just dropped her off at her mom's place where she's living right now, and on the way we got into a stupid argument that spiraled into a bigger stupid argument. It dragged on but as for the topic in which we were arguing, it was really pretty damn unimportant, or damning to the relationship. Who knows, though? I can't help but feel like she looks at stupid arguments as big reasons to avoid making a decision. Yet, when things get smoother over we always end up being really close and it feels like it used to when we were first together. I don't know where I'm going with this, exactly... Could have knocked her off the fence today, after the argument. I usually get out and give her a hug, maybe hang out a bit with her and her mom. Tonight we were actually supposed to have dinner together, and when we showed up, her mom wasn't there and since the vibe was still a little heated I just offered to bring up her stuff, and when she declined, I said my goodbyes without leaving the car. Felt kind of wierd. If she reads into that maybe she'll fall off the fence. But if I wanted to "knock her off the fence" in the way I would hope, what should I do? I fear that any attempt at bringing it up, no matter how cool I play it, will just result in her feeling backed into a corner, only to create wierd vibes after that. But at the same time, I wonder how long it will take for her to just make her decision on her own. Wish I was cooler with the FWB thing, or whatever you want to call us. But I can only do that so long, especially with someone I used to date, until I want to take the next step. Guess I'll just hang back for now and watch Red Dawn.
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