Zezhit Posted September 8, 2012 Posted September 8, 2012 My mind is in a whirl right now..i dont know what to think.Ive been over thinking these past few months.Me and my girlfriend are in a LDR,i feel as if im not as interested in her anymore.But i do love her though,i love her so much.It feels as if i dont know her anymore,like we are strangers,like she means nothing to me anymore.But i still love her.I dont know why i feel like that,but this sucks.Sometimes i feel like that,sometimes i dont.I dont know why...please help me..im at my breaking point...i have talked to her about this,she said she feels normal and still loves me dearly.Why am i feeling like this ? Is it just the distance thats screwing my mind up ?Will i still love her when i see her next month? I have OCD and i tend to overthink stuff and confuse myself.Pls help this is killing me !
TaraMaiden Posted September 8, 2012 Posted September 8, 2012 Have you been medically diagnosed with OCD? What is your main/specific compunction? What medication are you on, if any? Are you taking it regularly? Have you spoken to your therapist about this? What do they say?
Author Zezhit Posted September 8, 2012 Author Posted September 8, 2012 Have you been medically diagnosed with OCD? What is your main/specific compunction? What medication are you on, if any? Are you taking it regularly? Have you spoken to your therapist about this? What do they say? No im not medically diagnosed with OCD,but i know i have it by the way i think too much that my head starts to hurt like hell... Im on anti-biotics,erythromycin to be exact.I take it everyday. I dont have a therapist.
TaraMaiden Posted September 8, 2012 Posted September 8, 2012 This annoys the crap out of me. Auto-diagnosis is a pile or crock. You have no way of knowing whether you have OCD or not, by simply assuming you have, because of this, that and the other. You might be over-stressed, or have high anxiety levels, or be prone to panic attacks - but unless a Doctor - specialist - gives you a diagnosis, you can't go making wild claims like this. You probably love her - but are not IN love with her. it happens with some LDR relationships. It's not true that "Absence makes the heart grow fonder." Of all the sayings I know, this is perhaps one of the least accurate.
Author Zezhit Posted September 8, 2012 Author Posted September 8, 2012 This annoys the crap out of me. Auto-diagnosis is a pile or crock. You have no way of knowing whether you have OCD or not, by simply assuming you have, because of this, that and the other. You might be over-stressed, or have high anxiety levels, or be prone to panic attacks - but unless a Doctor - specialist - gives you a diagnosis, you can't go making wild claims like this. You probably love her - but are not IN love with her. it happens with some LDR relationships. It's not true that "Absence makes the heart grow fonder." Of all the sayings I know, this is perhaps one of the least accurate. I agree with what you say.Absense DOES NOT make the heart fonder.I do love her,but i dont feel the in love feelings i had before.What do u suggest i do ?
TaraMaiden Posted September 8, 2012 Posted September 8, 2012 Break up with her. No point misleading her, or trying to force your feelings. If you're not IN love with her - why lie, mislead and give her false hope? You owe it to her to be honest with her, and to cut you both loose. Simple.
Author Zezhit Posted September 8, 2012 Author Posted September 8, 2012 Break up with her. No point misleading her, or trying to force your feelings. If you're not IN love with her - why lie, mislead and give her false hope? You owe it to her to be honest with her, and to cut you both loose. Simple. I cant...theres something about her i cant let go...i feel it in my gut that its just the distance screwing me up..crap i just cant let her go
TaraMaiden Posted September 8, 2012 Posted September 8, 2012 Well that's your own insecurity. And holding onto her - even though you don't love her "In that way" is just selfish and egotistic. You're not holding onto her, for her, you're holding on to her as a prop for you. You need to gain independence and self-esteem. I think you need to see a therapist - if only for the fact that you believe your happiness and stability is someone else's responsibility. Because that's what you're "asking" of her, by refusing to let her go. Your happiness and serenity should never be dependent on having someone in your life to prop you up.
Author Zezhit Posted September 8, 2012 Author Posted September 8, 2012 Well that's your own insecurity. And holding onto her - even though you don't love her "In that way" is just selfish and egotistic. You're not holding onto her, for her, you're holding on to her as a prop for you. You need to gain independence and self-esteem. I think you need to see a therapist - if only for the fact that you believe your happiness and stability is someone else's responsibility. Because that's what you're "asking" of her, by refusing to let her go. Your happiness and serenity should never be dependent on having someone in your life to prop you up. But I have a feeling I might regret it..
TaraMaiden Posted September 8, 2012 Posted September 8, 2012 Why not wait until you see her, see what happens then? if you realise there's no romantic true love passion, then it's time to let go. Jut try to calm down until then.
Author Zezhit Posted September 8, 2012 Author Posted September 8, 2012 Why not wait until you see her, see what happens then? if you realise there's no romantic true love passion, then it's time to let go. Jut try to calm down until then. Thanks...I hope my passion for her flares again.I don't think I can live without someone as amazing as her
justwhoiam Posted September 9, 2012 Posted September 9, 2012 You need to meet her and see what you really feel for her. That's the only way. The sooner, the better.
todreaminblue Posted September 9, 2012 Posted September 9, 2012 My mind is in a whirl right now..i dont know what to think.Ive been over thinking these past few months.Me and my girlfriend are in a LDR,i feel as if im not as interested in her anymore.But i do love her though,i love her so much.It feels as if i dont know her anymore,like we are strangers,like she means nothing to me anymore.But i still love her.I dont know why i feel like that,but this sucks.Sometimes i feel like that,sometimes i dont.I dont know why...please help me..im at my breaking point...i have talked to her about this,she said she feels normal and still loves me dearly.Why am i feeling like this ? Is it just the distance thats screwing my mind up ?Will i still love her when i see her next month? I have OCD and i tend to overthink stuff and confuse myself.Pls help this is killing me ! Love doesn't die, feelings of attraction and the emotions of being in love need to be nurtured in a Ldr trust understanding compassion ,all need to be nurtured and upheld if they arent, that is when the in love feeling fades.Being in love with butterflies and that excited feeling will fade after time but if you nurture those traits that are variable compassion understanding trust and love(which is a constant).......the relationship will survive.I wish you the best....you and your partner need to put an equal amount of effort to keep that in love feeling...the little things help..deb
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