jen4 Posted July 21, 2004 Posted July 21, 2004 I think I've just been dumped. I say I think because I've never been dumped and don't know how it happens. Basically I asked him if he's dumping me and he said call it what you want. so yes,,,this sucks!! And it wasn't him just deciding he didn't want to see me anymore. I was at the gym where he works,he saw me talking to a guy,just an acquaintance. He said I was looking at the guy the same way I look at him. NO way. I don't even know this guy's name,just a short conversation basically he told me about his divorce and kids and asked me. yes,he is probably interested but I am not. I truly care about my boyfriend and would NEVER cheat on him. That is not me,if I want out I get out,cheating sucks! Well he was upset and said that his reaction to seeing me talk to a guy like that surprised him and that he couldn't be in a relationship where he knew I talked to guys and looked at them the way I do him. Part of me understands his point,but I was just talking and no he doesn't have my # and won't,this is just an acquaintance that today I talked to for maybe 3-4 min. the most ever. my bf and I have only been together for about 6-7 wks too,but I am falling in love with him. when he told me this,over the phone,he said he'll still talk to me. well,I want him back as a bf,not an acquaintance! Do I work out where he works tomorow as usual,or go to the other location-not too far away. I'm so sad and crying still. Gosh,this hurts!!!Please give me any input. JEN
vanandme4him Posted July 21, 2004 Posted July 21, 2004 IMHO, your bf was looking for an excuse to break up with you. It just happend to be that he saw you talking to that guy and thought "here's my opportunity". I don't believe that he would break up with you just because you were talking to a guy. And if he would break up with you over such a trivial thing, consider yourself lucky. He might have turned into an overly jealous bf that might end up being abusive.
Author jen4 Posted July 21, 2004 Author Posted July 21, 2004 I never thought of that! He was telling me how much he enjoyed our weekend. We actually got to spend the night together for the 1st time. He said he was so relaxed this weekend and felt so much closer to me,and now this! This is-was nothing!!! I am so mad at myself for talking to "that guy". geesh,I don't even know the guys name! I would take him back if he'd have me,but maybe that wouldn't be good in the longrun. I am so hurt. thanks again.
Author jen4 Posted July 21, 2004 Author Posted July 21, 2004 any insight?? I am so hurt. I talked to my mom over the phone,she said I'm better off with out him. she never liked him,because he's black. I had a big problem with her over that,so I shouldn't have told her he broke up with me. I am so heartbroken.
Guest74 Posted July 21, 2004 Posted July 21, 2004 If he's willing to break up with you for looking at someone else, then he's the one with the problem, not you. What are you supposed to do? Avert your eyes and turn tail every time a man approaches you? It's sort of hard to ignore half the world's population. I think you should take some time to focus on yourself. He has some growing up and maturing to do, and chances are he'll contact you when he's done so, if not sooner.
Leikela Posted July 21, 2004 Posted July 21, 2004 I am so sorry to hear that you are so hurt. Basically your boyfriend took a situation and over-reacted to it and used it against you. People casually talk to people of the opposite sex all the time. It's human nature!! Your boyfriend's actions stem from his own insecurity which results in this jealousy. You've only been dating 6 weeks so you guys are most likely still in the "honeymoon" phase and him on his best behavior. Can you image what he'll be like a year into the relationship? He'll probably have you talking to NOONE but him. I know it hurts now but be thankful this happened.
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