golk Posted September 5, 2012 Posted September 5, 2012 I have a few other more detailed threads but heres an update... So my ex and I were together for 4 years and she broke it off bc of not having enough time, needing space, the usual. Of course I begged and pleaded for about 2 weeks and that pushed her away. Then in the last two weeks I started acting like I didnt care and have been trying my hardest to go NC. My record is only 4 days but hey, its a little progress. I have talked to her the last 3 days though and we hungout 3 days ago. Well I talked to her best friend yesterday who she is EXTREMELY close with. Her friend is one of the nicest girls I've ever met and I know is on my side about the whole relationship breakup thing. I'm fairly certain she wouldn't lie to me. We would occassionally talk about relationship issues with each other and try to help each other out. My ex's friend told me some interesting things. -There is no other guy and has feelings for noone else. She does get hit on a lot though and enjoys the attention. -My ex said she is still very much IN love with me and wants to be with me. -I am the perfect guy for her. -She said she feels like she is coming around and feeling like she wants to date again. -When we do hangout it feels like when we first dated and everything is amazing. -BUT she did say that she's not sure she has the time to put into a relationship and she's trying to figure that out right now. Since she didn't tell me this directly but told her best friend who i dont think theres a reason to lie to, do you think that this is genuine and we have a chance?
g450 Posted September 5, 2012 Posted September 5, 2012 Yet another breadcrumb thread. If all that BS were true she would still be with you. Sorry that you seem to not get that. She is simply what is known as an attention whore and those types of women will always be miserable. Stop talking to her friends and block all communication with her. Move on. That is the standard (and correct) answer you will get here. It's up to you to take the advice given or simply keep feeding off her breadcrumbs and be her doormat. What are you going to do? 1
SandRat Posted September 6, 2012 Posted September 6, 2012 Yet another breadcrumb thread. If all that BS were true she would still be with you. Sorry that you seem to not get that. She is simply what is known as an attention whore and those types of women will always be miserable. Stop talking to her friends and block all communication with her. Move on. That is the standard (and correct) answer you will get here. It's up to you to take the advice given or simply keep feeding off her breadcrumbs and be her doormat. What are you going to do? QFT! Move on buddy. You can do better. Get a girlfriend that IS into you. And her girlfriend that is talking to you, she isn't your friend, trust me on this. You know Bros. before Hoes? We guys ain't got **** on the wimminz in that department. Lol! She's keeping you calm by telling you just enough good stuff to keep you at bay. Trust me on this, been there done that.
Car10e Posted September 6, 2012 Posted September 6, 2012 I bet if she see's that you have moved on, she'll come running back.
Gab09 Posted September 6, 2012 Posted September 6, 2012 Don't take it to heart.. A lot of times it happens, that's just the way the human brain works in a lot of cases.. But don't set your heart completely on it, because you will just get hurt more than you already are. Best of luck, godbless
Author golk Posted September 6, 2012 Author Posted September 6, 2012 Yeah for a few days she thought i was moving on bc i was trying NC for the first time and going out a lot and she did come running back all freaked out. Of course it wasn't real and only because of jealousy. It really sucks being sucked back into the whole game. I feel like its impossible to get out of it as long as she keeps feeding me hope Is it possible to keep and ex in your life a little and still move on??
SandRat Posted September 7, 2012 Posted September 7, 2012 Yeah for a few days she thought i was moving on bc i was trying NC for the first time and going out a lot and she did come running back all freaked out. Of course it wasn't real and only because of jealousy. It really sucks being sucked back into the whole game. I feel like its impossible to get out of it as long as she keeps feeding me hope Is it possible to keep and ex in your life a little and still move on?? Please reread my post man.
Dblock10 Posted September 7, 2012 Posted September 7, 2012 Is it possible to keep and ex in your life a little and still move on?? i think if your the one that still wants them then no, however if you did the dumping and what not then yes
Car10e Posted September 7, 2012 Posted September 7, 2012 Yeah for a few days she thought i was moving on bc i was trying NC for the first time and going out a lot and she did come running back all freaked out. Of course it wasn't real and only because of jealousy. It really sucks being sucked back into the whole game. I feel like its impossible to get out of it as long as she keeps feeding me hope Is it possible to keep and ex in your life a little and still move on?? The best thing to do right now is completely move on. Even if she does come back to you out of jealously, you need to tell her you are aware of whats she's doing. She doesn't want to be with you, and she doesn't want others to be with you. Thats completely unfair for you.
Calico Posted September 7, 2012 Posted September 7, 2012 Is it possible to keep and ex in your life a little and still move on?? I've tried that for a couple weeks (which felt like months) and no, I don't think it works. You'll either be clingy or you'll pretend, neither of which feels good, and it's an immense energy sink. You can't be friends as long as you want her and are emotional about her. I bit the bullet when she started to talk more about the new guy, the one she cheated with. That's when I snapped a little out of my delusions. It was very painful to arrive at that conclusion and I squirmed for much longer than was good for me, and I question even now if it was the right decision. Hope dies hard. But the longer you wait before you start letting go, the longer it'll take before you'll feel happy again.
Charles Grey Posted September 7, 2012 Posted September 7, 2012 I have a few other more detailed threads but heres an update... So my ex and I were together for 4 years and she broke it off bc of not having enough time, needing space, the usual. Of course I begged and pleaded for about 2 weeks and that pushed her away. Then in the last two weeks I started acting like I didnt care and have been trying my hardest to go NC. My record is only 4 days but hey, its a little progress. I have talked to her the last 3 days though and we hungout 3 days ago. Well I talked to her best friend yesterday who she is EXTREMELY close with. Her friend is one of the nicest girls I've ever met and I know is on my side about the whole relationship breakup thing. I'm fairly certain she wouldn't lie to me. We would occassionally talk about relationship issues with each other and try to help each other out. My ex's friend told me some interesting things. -There is no other guy and has feelings for noone else. She does get hit on a lot though and enjoys the attention. -My ex said she is still very much IN love with me and wants to be with me. -I am the perfect guy for her. -She said she feels like she is coming around and feeling like she wants to date again. -When we do hangout it feels like when we first dated and everything is amazing. -BUT she did say that she's not sure she has the time to put into a relationship and she's trying to figure that out right now. Since she didn't tell me this directly but told her best friend who i dont think theres a reason to lie to, do you think that this is genuine and we have a chance? The best thing to do at this point is to talk to her personally and ask her what she really feels and what she is willing to give up for that relationship. Also ask her is she is ready to be in a serious relationship with you or not that way you will know what the real score is between the two of you...
Author golk Posted September 8, 2012 Author Posted September 8, 2012 I appreciate all the advice given on this forum, it has helped immensely! I had a sit down talk with her recently and she seemed genuine which makes it harder to let go of her. I know I'm going to have to go NC soon if things don't change but I'm not sure if I'm ready. It's the hardest thing I've had to do.
SandRat Posted September 8, 2012 Posted September 8, 2012 I appreciate all the advice given on this forum, it has helped immensely! I had a sit down talk with her recently and she seemed genuine which makes it harder to let go of her. I know I'm going to have to go NC soon if things don't change but I'm not sure if I'm ready. It's the hardest thing I've had to do. The most important things in life usually are.
Author golk Posted September 8, 2012 Author Posted September 8, 2012 The most important things in life usually are. I agree with that completely. I had no idea it would be this hard honestly.
Author golk Posted September 8, 2012 Author Posted September 8, 2012 no. i tried. read my thread. I just read through some of your threads man, and let me tell you, our situations are veryyyy similar in terms of what our exes are/were doing. Saying the SAME exact stuff and really leading us on. I'm in that same position where things look to be on the up and up right now but I'm pretty scared after reading your threads that they might not be..
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