thissuckss Posted September 5, 2012 Posted September 5, 2012 (edited) we dated for about a year and a half and was the best relationship either one of us had ever had. we never were friends before it happened. over the summer we started fighting a lot and she broke up with me about 2 and a half weeks ago saying she wasnt sure how she felt and wanted to give it time before we see if we want to try and fix things. she initially said she didn't want to talk to me but that lasted like 3 days and then she told me she wants to be good friends since i am an important part of her life that she cant let go of. i love her more than anything else. she says she misses it and gets sad sometimes. she says she doesnt want me to leave her life. we hungout over the weekend and we held hands, kissed, cuddled and even messed around a little. when we hangout we act like we are still together not just friends. before i left she hinted to me that i should ask her to hangout again. she seemed soo happy when we were hanging out, she seemed just as happy as when things were going perfect during our relationship. recently ive noticed this guy started texting her. this guy liked her a lot during our relationship and i didnt like that. now that we are not together im afraid shes going to start to have feelings for this guy and when i bring it up to her she gets mad. am i worrying too much? what should i do? part of me thinks hanging out with her and showing her i have changed will get her back. and another part of me says she doesnt want to come back and she is going to fall for that other guy. please help edit: when we hungout over the weekend i brought all of the things she gave me, pictures of us, notes she wrote me, everything. i planned on giving it back to her after we hungout but she seemed so happy and she might want to get back together again. i was going to tell her we should go into NC. im afraid of what that will do, im scared she will just move on to that other guy even though she says i shouldnt worry about her liking someone else, but in reality i do, i worry a lot about it and i cant help it Edited September 5, 2012 by thissuckss more info
Author thissuckss Posted September 5, 2012 Author Posted September 5, 2012 can anyone help me out? i really want her back and i dont know what to do
Tree_Salmon Posted September 5, 2012 Posted September 5, 2012 Take a month of NC and work on yourself starting now. Be in a better place emotionally, physically, financially, etc by the end of that month. Chances are she will contact you by then, but if she doesn't you can initiate something. If/when you guys talk, you need to be very casual and cool. Don't go in begging for a relationship. Let her bring all that up. Just feel it out and see if she is willing to talk to you. Don't act needy or insecure. Best advice I can give.
Author thissuckss Posted September 5, 2012 Author Posted September 5, 2012 thanks for the advice, i have really been thinking about doing that lately, but i dont know how to initiate that? just dont tell her and ignore her? or tell her i cant keep being this "friends" thing and that im only in this for a relationship.
bluefairy812 Posted September 5, 2012 Posted September 5, 2012 it sounds like she wants to have her cake and eat it too (i hate this quote by the way but thats the best way to describe it.) please give her space and explain that it's either all or nothing. i know we want to be selfish sometimes and keep the ex there in hope of not losing them or them changing their minds, but it is best to leave them alone and let them miss you.. let them see you are standing your ground. i have been on NC for 4 weeks now. ex has texted me 4 times and called once. i have no intentions (as hard as it may be) of going back unless he were to tell me something along the lines of "lets work it out" rather than "why are we not talking?"
flitzanu Posted September 5, 2012 Posted September 5, 2012 "i need time" = "i want to date/bang other people" cut your ties, go NC, and don't be her "friend" right now, because she wants time apart. she asked for it, so make sure she gets it. if it's a mistake, she needs to see that it's her mistake, and you're never going to prove it to her by things being exactly as they were.
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