kitkatz29 Posted September 5, 2012 Posted September 5, 2012 (edited) So I've been seeing a guy for a few months that I met online and he still has his profile up. It's something that's been bothering me, and I want to bring it up. But I'm having a hard time getting the nerve. My account has been disabled for the most part, however from time to time I log back on to see if his profile is up. About a month or so ago I visited his profile when he was online and I know he noticed, b/c besides the fact that you get a notification when someone visits it, he "coincidentally" text me within 30 seconds of me going on it. Anyway, the next night I was at his house and he brought up the dating site and how he got some messages from some very obese women. He mentioned that he updated his profile to try and discourage women that overweight from messaging him. (I figured he was telling me all this b/c he knew I already saw it, and was doing some damage control). He then mentioned that he was probably going to just delete his account b/c he didn't see much of a point to keep it anymore anyway. I was happy to hear this and took it as a good sign that he was telling me this. So I chose not to say much. But now it's been a month later and his profile is still up. Anyway, we've been taking things slow and I'm not trying to push the "what are we" conversation. Truth be told, I would like the "girlfriend" title, but I'm not in any rush to get it. However, I do want to bring up the dating site and ask him about it and see if he would be willing to take it down. I feel like we've been seeing each other long enough to where he shouldn't have his profile active anymore. But I don't know how to bring this up without making it seem like I'm trying to define things or put a label on it. Any suggestions? Or do you think if I bring it up it's going to automatically steer the convo in that direction? Edited September 5, 2012 by kitkatz29
Mycteria Posted September 5, 2012 Posted September 5, 2012 You don't have a right to ask him to remove his profile until you are officially exclusive, IMO. When you get the girlfriend title that you are apparently not in any rush to get, then you can ask him to take his profile down. You're still checking yours too. He doesn't know that you're only doing it to check up on him. Until you are his girlfriend and you disable yours too, you don't really have any right to complain.
SJC2008 Posted September 5, 2012 Posted September 5, 2012 This is the hardest part of OLD IMO, besides getting flaked on and GIG'd lol. From a mans POV he may not want to scare you away but he may still be shopping. If these "few months" are 3 or more it should be down and you all should be exclusive.
Imajerk17 Posted September 5, 2012 Posted September 5, 2012 I agree with SJC. If by "few months" you mean 3 months or more, by now you are due a straight answer of where things are going. You'll be fine if you ask him in a *matter-of-fact* way. BUT you better be prepared for an answer you don't like.
Imajerk17 Posted September 5, 2012 Posted September 5, 2012 I agree with SJC. If by "few months" you mean 3 months or more, by now you definitely are due a straight answer of where things are going. You'll be fine if you ask him in a *matter-of-fact* way. BUT you better be prepared for an answer you don't like.
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