bluefairy812 Posted September 4, 2012 Posted September 4, 2012 hi all: long story short. i'm 26, he's 24. we loved each other from the moment we met. we were both each others first real adult relationships aside from high school. we lived together for 3.5 years. were together for 4 years. we grew apart. things like school, friends, living our lives unfortunately came in between us. we had major fights for months. he threw up a red flag about a year ago saying he didn't see me in his future and yet we decided to still pursue our relationship by taking it one step at a time. we had one major last fight and i called it off and left (also packed my things). one week later i came back asking to work it out. he said no. he doesnt see me in his future, isn't in love with me anymore and wants to live his life. he asked to be friends. 4 weeks later, i'm still in contact with him and i realized i was hurting myself and couldnt be friends. i deleted my fb and removed him from instagram. he questioned it and i explained. all he is doing now is partying, drinking and hanging out with his female coworkers. 8 weeks after the breakup and 4 weeks of no contact, i'm not over it. being that its been 4 years. i love him to death. but all he is doing he contacting me with breadcrumbs!!! (i stopped talking to him cold turkey 4 weeks ago)! he texts me with "i hope all is well" at 2:30am and "please dont get upset i'm contacting you i'm just wanting to say hi and let you know your in my thoughts and i hope your ok" at 7am! he even called me last night at 11pm. i keep ignorning EVERYTHING. and NOW today he texts me with "why are you ignorning my calls? i thought we were going to be civil and keep in touch". I DONT UNDERSTAND. IF HE doesn't see me in his future and had the last word on not wanting to work it out, what is going on? i would take him back the moment he says he misses me and wants me back. but obviously, using the NC rule, he is more concerned about me ignorning him rather than getting back with me... please help. i'm hopeless. his messages keep throwing me off and confusing me.
ditzchic Posted September 5, 2012 Posted September 5, 2012 It doesn't sound like he's giving you any breadcrumbs that he wants to get back together. You're giving them to yourself. You're reading a whole lot into this that just isn't there. He's not confusing you, you're confusing yourself. You were exactly right when you said he is more concerned with you ignoring him than with getting you back. He'll get over that. If he texts you and says he made a mistake and wants you back, then have it. Until then keep NC. You're not ready to talk to him yet.
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