Kizzyfur Posted July 21, 2004 Posted July 21, 2004 Originally posted by miz_barby I'm sure things weren't all roses and sunshine with his wife BUT I doubt they were as bad as he made them sound to you when he first met you. (then again who knows maybe he's one of the "honest" MM in a relationship outside his marriage) Well, it just happens that I met her first. Knew them as a couple for 2 years. I've witnessed first hand how she treats EVERYONE in her life. He's also taken me to meet his friends/family in his "home" state and they never liked her nor the way she treated him. Her own family told her that if they ever got a divorce it would be HER fault. So no, I'm not basing my opinion about their marriage soley on what he tells me.
Kizzyfur Posted July 21, 2004 Posted July 21, 2004 Well hell, I guess that's what I get for not reading ALL the posts in a thread BEFORE posting... I didn't get past the first or second page before posting so was under the impression everyone was still telling their stories about the way they feel about love. Didn't realize it had gone into a dabate about what's "right" and what's "wrong".
RoboHobo Posted July 21, 2004 Posted July 21, 2004 Yeah, I think true love does exist, but as someone said, it is sometimes hard to hold on to, because society and modern life gets in the way. The problem is true love it isn't the salve that will right all wrongs as it is in books and fairy tales, it just provides us with the motivation and strength to face our trials and demons. What I have for my ex is true love, she is the most amazing person I know , but she decided to break up because she and I need time apart to resolve our issues before we can be in a healthy relationship. I don't know for sure if she will be with me again, but for a while I had what HoldOn has, and I hope to have it with her again. I can be happy without her, I just love being with her. I agree with EtErNaLlYCoNfUsEd, all these threads about "I'm cheating..." etcetera makes me sick. I don't think that makes the person bad in any way. They are just making a mistake which needs to stop. It is important to realize when you have made a mistake and try to rectify the wrong, not warp things to satisfy your wants. I don't think it's a crime to love someone who is in a relationship, or for the person in the relationship to love someone else, just end the relationship before being a new one. It is just respectful to everyone involved. I personally would never ever cheat! Ever! Kizzyfur, I don't think that you are a bad person, but I do disagree with you actions. It isn't important what I think though, it's just my point of view. I hope that things work out for you in the end. I want everybody to be happy, no matter who you are or how you live your life.
Author EC Posted July 21, 2004 Author Posted July 21, 2004 Yeah, I think true love does exist, but as someone said, it is sometimes hard to hold on to, because society and modern life gets in the way. The problem is true love it isn't the salve that will right all wrongs as it is in books and fairy tales, it just provides us with the motivation and strength to face our trials and demons. That's exactly what messes me up. I guess I'd rather live in the books and fairytales than face the ugly reality of what is expected and what is going on in the world today.
dudesomewhere Posted July 21, 2004 Posted July 21, 2004 you ever read or start a thread and initially think how it will turn out and then realize it gets mucked up or marred by some posts? Sure opinions are welcome but it's like posts about fortitude and trueness get defaced with funky ass opinions. That said...I like this RoboHobo. I liked your post EC...then some ppl's posts kept me away...along come RoboHobo to bring it out of the gutter . So now I feel comfortable with it again, hehe. You don't have to live in books and fairytales but that shouldn't prevent you from living your life as idealic as you can. The ugly reality is simply the ugliness in people and the ugly people (soulwise) just outnumber the more pure and innocent minded. People tend to not put effort into the things in life and the thing that deserves most effort is love and affairs of the heart. You can live beautifully in an ugly world. Affairs of the heart involve fidelity, trust, honesty, decency...all the things that just happen to be moral because that is what being true is all about. People would rather throw those things away because it involves effort. But damn, that to me is what makes humans better...or at least should. I believe it's all about loving yourself, which is the very first step to truly loving anyone else. Some might argue otherwise...but when you truly love yourself you devote yourself singly to one person. Love and respect go hand in hand. Some people think they love when they lack respect...for themselves and for others. When you respect yourself you view yourself as special and you want to be treated by the one you love just as special as you would them. Some people look at their hearts as meaningless as some random object on an assembly line, to be tinkered and toyed with by numerous strangers as it makes its journey from construction, to distribution, to retail, to consumer ownership and eventually to some garbage heap...never to be cherished. gl to all who don't value their hearts
Author EC Posted July 21, 2004 Author Posted July 21, 2004 You don't have to live in books and fairytales but that shouldn't prevent you from living your life as idealic as you can. The ugly reality is simply the ugliness in people and the ugly people (soulwise) just outnumber the more pure and innocent minded. People tend to not put effort into the things in life and the thing that deserves most effort is love and affairs of the heart. You can live beautifully in an ugly world. Affairs of the heart involve fidelity, trust, honesty, decency...all the things that just happen to be moral because that is what being true is all about. People would rather throw those things away because it involves effort. But damn, that to me is what makes humans better...or at least should. I believe it's all about loving yourself, which is the very first step to truly loving anyone else. Some might argue otherwise...but when you truly love yourself you devote yourself singly to one person. Love and respect go hand in hand. Some people think they love when they lack respect...for themselves and for others. When you respect yourself you view yourself as special and you want to be treated by the one you love just as special as you would them. Some people look at their hearts as meaningless as some random object on an assembly line, to be tinkered and toyed with by numerous strangers as it makes its journey from construction, to distribution, to retail, to consumer ownership and eventually to some garbage heap...never to be cherished. **poking dudesomewhere** "Are you real?" Finally a guy that has it figured out. The only other guy I've said that about was John Mayer with his song "Your body is a wonderland" That boy has it figured out too. Bravo dudesomewhere!!! Everything you said hit it right on the nail. Why can't there be more of you in the world. You should teach guys seminars lol.
moimeme Posted July 21, 2004 Posted July 21, 2004 You can live beautifully in an ugly world. Very nicely said, dude
Demented Posted July 21, 2004 Posted July 21, 2004 Originally posted by miz_barby Oh is that the situation with (you know her name) the one you're with now? She was the OW while you were with your "wife" Yeah the OW is getting the same in return so see like I keep saying "what goes around comes around" She cheated WITH you while you were married NOW she's getting cheated ON by YOU while you two are in a serious relationship! Sorry buddy but it's the truth! Not entirely...you see, I haven't really "cheated" on her yet...just keeping my options open...although there was that one time...with someone we both know...hehehe... And, Dammit, I wish you would get that picture fixed! It's like shoving a needle in my eyeball! :lol:
Wellnowuknow Posted July 21, 2004 Posted July 21, 2004 I believe love exists and the right person exists. You just need to meet the right person for love to exists for you. And when you love yourself and give nothing but love love will find you. The world has turned ugly But like my fav rapper said "Ladies you gotta keep yo head up" 2-pac So i keep my head up and pray some day he will come.
Curt Posted July 21, 2004 Moderators Posted July 21, 2004 I think that's a keeper post dude. I've saved it in a text file for future reference. Really nicely said. Curt
Wellnowuknow Posted July 21, 2004 Posted July 21, 2004 "I've been married two months and want a divorce" "Ive cheated on my bf of 4 years with my ex" "One of my best friends girlfriend is cheating on him with me" WHEN WILL IT END? uhhhhhhhhhhhh
pretty_petal Posted July 23, 2004 Posted July 23, 2004 This thread may have moved on from the original... does real love exist thing. I didn't read all 62 replys. But i'm in love... properly. We respect one another, would never cheat, trust, talk, have a good time etc etc. Ok so i'm probably too young for that. 16 years probably isn't enough experience to say its proper. But it sure seems that way, been together nearly 18 months and we've never argued or got bored or doubted our love. OK so we only actually fell in love after about 7 months and loads of people say they r in love as soon as they become a couple. But everything has seemed so good, the 'honeymoon period' doesn't appear to have ended, there have been a few bumps but we got right thru them. Its all good!! But as one person said 'i'm just waiting for the bomb to drop' it really does seem to be too good to be true. All the time i'm thinking 'surely it has to end some time... right??'. I also read somewhere on here that you should love like you won't ever get hurt which i follow, i thought that was a great idea. Ok. now i will stop waffling. petal x
HoldOn Posted July 23, 2004 Posted July 23, 2004 Hey, pretty petal. That's sweet that you have a great relationship. Many high schoolers are totally wacko. No offense to anyone, you know what I mean. Take your relationship one day at a time and remember ONE DAY you will have an argument and it's normal.
Author EC Posted July 23, 2004 Author Posted July 23, 2004 Yay more happy stories!! I love to hear happy stories. They give me hope. But I still feel like the bomb will drop.... but you know what, even if it does, I feel like I have had the best time ever and I wouldn't give up the memories I have with this person good or bad for anything in the world. Like the quote says "It's better to have loved and lost then never to have loved at all."
Author EC Posted April 26, 2005 Author Posted April 26, 2005 LOL It funny I just read over this post that I wrote a while ago and well...nothings changed and I feel in fact as if its getting worse. I just talked to one of my friends and shes all happy because the "engaged" guy that she has a crush on at work decided he wants to date her in secret. And she is estatic! HELLO he is ENGAGED.with a BABY on the way!!!! What is wrong with some people?????
HoldOn Posted April 26, 2005 Posted April 26, 2005 Ha! the memories! Wow, it's too bad about your friend. How can you shake these people awake!
blind_otter Posted April 26, 2005 Posted April 26, 2005 I think it's because we have the wrong idea of what love is. At least that's my opinion. Like, to me, love isn't the breath-taking, exhilarating, groin-clenching (for me ) sensation that we are all familiar with. That's the first component, I guess. Afterwards, though, the seed really takes hold when you start to create "mud" for the roots to take hold in. All the crap you go through to be together. The choices you make to forgoe hangin with your buds to be with this person. The arguments you work through and apologies you accept. Learning about what they went through, the grossness of what they endured to get to where they are, and revealing the ickiness of your own complicated life. And, after all that, when you reveal what you think is the ugliest, most monstrous part of yourself, to see that they accept you.... That compassionate, enduring, calm, complacent, companionate, endearing, sensation. Complimentary, supplimentary. Not all tingly-toes and stuff like that. Hmmmm....I haven't been able to coherently write that out for years now. Looking back I never really loved my exBF (the psycho who is in jail). I said I did, but I didn't. As I get older I get a better concept of what I want, and it's not so bad.
Author EC Posted April 26, 2005 Author Posted April 26, 2005 And, after all that, when you reveal what you think is the ugliest, most monstrous part of yourself, to see that they accept you.... That compassionate, enduring, calm, complacent, companionate, endearing, sensation. Complimentary, supplimentary. Not all tingly-toes and stuff like that. Hmmmm....I haven't been able to coherently write that out for years now. Looking back I never really loved my exBF (the psycho who is in jail). I said I did, but I didn't. As I get older I get a better concept of what I want, and it's not so bad. I agree...but its so sad I think that everyone has the wrong idea and keep hurting innocent people in order to find something once that toe clentching feeling is gone. Im so upset at my friend for what she is doing. She has a bf herself who is madly in love with her and this guy at work is engaged with a baby on the way...and they are so selfish and caught up in lust that they dont care what they are doing or who they are hurting. It sickens me.
ConfusedInOC Posted April 26, 2005 Posted April 26, 2005 Originally posted by EC I'm just writing to vent and let out some thoughts that have been buggin me. I swear if I read one more cheating or Other woman other man post Im going to barf. It seems nowadays everyone is with someone for all the wrong reasons. People are cheating, abusing, lying, creeping, incest, backstabbing, keeping secrets. Whats going on in the world today? I guess I'm just a hopeless romantic and everyday I'm dis-illusioned more and more and it brings me down. I want to know does "real" love exist? That "OMG, can't eat, can't sleep, I need you to breathe" love? Is there really one person made specifically for another person to live happily ever after? Is there ever a happily ever after anymore? Feel free to post your thoughts, stories or opinions. I know I'm not the only one out there that feels this way. Yes, it does exist. The problem is it's rare that BOTH feel the same way.
blind_otter Posted April 26, 2005 Posted April 26, 2005 Originally posted by EC I agree...but its so sad I think that everyone has the wrong idea and keep hurting innocent people in order to find something once that toe clentching feeling is gone. Im so upset at my friend for what she is doing. She has a bf herself who is madly in love with her and this guy at work is engaged with a baby on the way...and they are so selfish and caught up in lust that they dont care what they are doing or who they are hurting. It sickens me. Yeah, my friend Mr. T was all interested in luring this chick away from her fiance and I told him that was a disgusting impulse. I mean, if she wants to leave him, fine, wait for her, but jeez, don't steal people's lovers.
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