Inflikted Posted August 30, 2012 Posted August 30, 2012 As some of you may know, there's a girl I work with I've been interested in for a little while. I was going to ask her out this past Saturday, but I chickened out. I set a new goal to ask her out tonight. Went to work and *almost* chickened out again. Seriously, came THIS close to just leaving. But I managed to put it out there. It... came out a little more awkwardly than I had played it in my head, though. I asked her if she was doing anything next weekend; she was, so I asked what about next weekend, which she wasn't doing anything. I said we should go out some time, and she said "Like a date?". I just kinda said "Sure". She said she's dated coworkers in the past and it never worked out, but she said "Let me think about it". I just said okay, and made my exit. So, I guess it wasn't a "No", but it wasn't exactly a yes, either. She didn't particularly seemed shocked or weirded out by me asking her, so... I guess it's nice to have put it out there, but I still don't quite know where I stand now. I'm sort of kicking myself, because maybe I should've given her my number after she said she'll think about it. I don't see her again for a little while, so I don't know how she'll get back to me. And when I do see her again, I don't know if I should wait for her to bring it up, or say something, myself. Or, perhaps "Let me think about it" is just general "girl language" for "no"? Either way, I guess it's a bit of a relief. Proud of myself for pulling the trigger, even if I wasn't quite as "smooth" as I wish I would've been.
ChatroomHero Posted August 31, 2012 Posted August 31, 2012 But I managed to put it out there. It... came out a little more awkwardly than I had played it in my head, though. QUOTE] On your other post I said it would probably be awkward because you were overthinking it and too worked up and should have waited a bit and tried not to be so anxious when you asked her. That being said I still think the thing that could really hurt your chances is not being patient and just stewing on it eager for her answer. A lack of patience can make you rush it when you see her again, i.e. the first 1/2 day you think you need to give her time but then you keep wondering if she is going to give you an answer until you get all worked up and decide you have to know right then and there so you won't be stuck wondering... The great news is you aksed her and you didn't get a 'no'. IMO your best bet is to just let it go, be normal, and if she doesn't respond right away don't push it. If you work with her say next tuesday and that's the last time you'll see her before the weekend and she doesn't respond, don't freak out and think you have to find out before the weekend. If she doesn't give you an answer about the weekend remember there are plenty of other weekends. The following week just do your followup. In your situation I think a little patience can go a long way with her. Be content for now knowing you asked out a hottie and have a chance, don't be desperate. If she really has reservations dating a co-worker, put her at-ease by showing her you can be cool and casual about things after asking her out. She will possibly be looking to see if the potential exists for things to be weird after you asked her out, before making a decision.
Author Inflikted Posted August 31, 2012 Author Posted August 31, 2012 Heh, well, I'm not sure I was awkward in an eager desperate way, more so in a way where I probably sounded a tad bit nervous saying what I said to her. Looks like it could be a couple of weeks before I work a shift with her, if not longer, and since we don't see each other outside of work...
ChatroomHero Posted August 31, 2012 Posted August 31, 2012 (edited) Patience. You got a 'maybe' and a reason that she is not sure about dating co-workers, which could well mean she is interested in you. If she is interested she will be there later a couple of weeks later when the opportunity presents itself. Personally if it were me, I wouldn't push it. I mean if you didn't get an answer after 2 weeks I would definitely follow up but I just think if you push for an answer next time you see her she might see it as a situation where there is a high level of interest on your part that could get complicated at work. In the short term when you work with her I would work it like an audition of how things at work would be normal. Just my opinion, good luck! Edited August 31, 2012 by ChatroomHero
Author Inflikted Posted August 31, 2012 Author Posted August 31, 2012 Good point, I'll definitely keep that in mind. On the bright side, I remember a few weeks ago, I overheard another coworker asking her out, and I don't know what she ended up telling him, but I heard her repeatedly deflect him by saying "I feel like that would be really weird...". So, at the very least, I appreciate that she explained the situation to me and said she'd think about it, rather than just saying "That would be weird", heh.
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