Berrie26 Posted August 30, 2012 Posted August 30, 2012 I have been dating a man for a little over a year now (we were close friends for many years beforehand). He is 41 and divorced with a 5 year old. I have 2 small children from my previous marriage too. He is amazing with my kids and the kids are so attached to eachother. Also his son absolutely adores me to the point where he cries when I'm not around. When we spend time together it's like the "perfect" family of 5. But, my boyfriend is classic emotionally unavailable. His ex wife cheated on him and his father whom he was very close to committed suicide all in the same year. Add this to issues with his mother growing up and he's honestly just not good at being emotionally present. He ALWAYS has a text fling with other women going on. I'm talking a morning, noon and night all-day texting sessions. These girls last a month or so then he replaces them with new ones. We share a cell phone plan so I can see all the messages, although he's blind to this fact. He never texts them when we're spending time together and its not physical to my knowledge. But still it obviously upsets me deeply, as its a way for him to avoid emotional intimacy with me. We get along amazingly well aside from this HUGE issue. We don't argue, we have an amazing sex life, but there's just an emotional chunk missing on his end. I know he has emotional problems and these are not my fault. I am a therapist so I have patience for this kind of thing, but after a year it's really wearing on me emotionally He wants us to move in together soon, but how can I do that knowing that he has these flings? Am I going to spend my whole life being "cheated" on for lack of a better term by someone who can't emotionally commit? I deeply care for this man and his son, but I just feel so lost - is there any hope? I rarely confront him on these women, as I don't believe in ultimatums, but is it time I set firm boundaries? or just throw in the towel and start the process of moving on?
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