dollface07 Posted August 29, 2012 Posted August 29, 2012 Okay so after a tumultuous first half year of our new relationship we weathered that storm and are now public and spent the end of the summer traveling extensively together...everything in our relationship is good except in the sex department I don't want every stage to be an uphill battle I am still exhausted from the first 6 months of gaining public acknowledgement but I am not happy because I feel my bf is a selfish lover...for example, he doesn't provide me with oral sex and has never tried and has no intention of doing so in the future. Ladies, I began my official sex life later than others (late 20s) isn't it my right to fully explore my sexuality in all aspects. After all he has no problem with me giving him oral sex and also when we have regular intercourse he always comes first so that in the second round he can last longer which he does and then I have my orgasm but even without giving him oral sex he will always have more orgasms than I do...so it's unfair somehow. I have a headache and am beginning to feel resentful, the thing is outside of the sex department he's an amazing guy. But I want to fully enjoy my sex life because in a couple of years my sex drive will peak (doesn't it do so in early 30s?) I don't want to do myself an injustice by not maximizing my sexual pleasure. Maybe this sounds superficial but I never realized how important oral sex really is to me until I became more sexually active. Am I being unreasonable? Thank you for responding.
veggirl Posted August 29, 2012 Posted August 29, 2012 You're not being unreasonable. why won't he give you oral?
Hawaii50 Posted August 29, 2012 Posted August 29, 2012 Sex doesn't matter, unless it's not there. Oh yeah, and you will never be happy in the relationship. 1
pteromom Posted August 29, 2012 Posted August 29, 2012 isn't it my right to fully explore my sexuality in all aspects. Yes. But it isn't his responsibility to assist you in that. Have one more discussion with him. Explain that you really would like to receive oral sometimes. Ask him why he doesn't want to do it. There may be something you can do - like if you have a smell or taste, you can shower, or even do it in the bath or hot tub. But if he says he just doesn't like doing it, either walk away or accept you won't get it. Because even if he agrees to try to do it more often, he'll do it but then start backing off it again, and eventually will stop doing it altogether. Someone isn't gonna do something they don't like to do. 1
weallfalldown Posted August 29, 2012 Posted August 29, 2012 do a sniff test, if it aint smelling peachy, most guys won't do oral...
IcedEarth Posted August 29, 2012 Posted August 29, 2012 My girlfriend doesn't give me blowjobs, but I don't care. I'd much rather just have sex, oral is boring to me even though she's quite good at it.
Hawaii50 Posted August 29, 2012 Posted August 29, 2012 do a sniff test, if it aint smelling peachy, most guys won't do oral... Well... any other kind of fruit is good too. just nothing aquatic. 1
Author dollface07 Posted August 29, 2012 Author Posted August 29, 2012 Sniff test LOL i was rolling laughing at this one weallfalldown! trust me it's not about hygiene im OCD about being hair free and extremely clean down there and he has no problem fingering me etc...and he likes my smell
Author dollface07 Posted August 29, 2012 Author Posted August 29, 2012 I wish I shared your same feelings then I wouldn't be in this make or break a relationship situation if only i could feel like you sigh
Author dollface07 Posted August 29, 2012 Author Posted August 29, 2012 Yes. But it isn't his responsibility to assist you in that. But if he says he just doesn't like doing it, either walk away or accept you won't get it. Because even if he agrees to try to do it more often, he'll do it but then start backing off it again, and eventually will stop doing it altogether. Someone isn't gonna do something they don't like to do. Very wise advice thank you so much for taking the time to reply. I will try my best to have one final discussion but it feels so demeaning somehow to have to ask for what I feel are my basic sex rights or something...but you are right it isn't his responsibility to assist me in that. Thanks again for your perspective.
Greznog Posted August 29, 2012 Posted August 29, 2012 isn't it my right to fully explore my sexuality in all aspects. Sure, but nobody is under any obligation to aid you in doing so.
Author dollface07 Posted August 29, 2012 Author Posted August 29, 2012 You're not being unreasonable. why won't he give you oral? Honestly I don't know when I asked him if he ever gave his ex oral sex he said no and when I asked why not? He said "b/c she never asked" Wtf...SO i will not ask him b/c i've made it abundantly clear that it is my preference to have this part of my sex life active. I THINK but i havent confirmed that he is inexperienced and therefore perhaps intimidated about doing this on me...he said I am not patient but I told him 7 months 8 months that's patient enough...no other woman would accept an oral sexless relationship where he is getting it and getting it abundantly and she is not sigh...tired
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