Dante1507 Posted August 29, 2012 Posted August 29, 2012 (edited) Hi guys, I'm new here, read a couple of topics, and since I'm in need of some advice ( relationship trouble ) I'm gonna post my situation here. My ex gf left me about 2 weeks ago. But, the whole story needs to be said in order to understand how complicated this whole ****ing thing is. We were very good friends for about a year before we got together, all of our friends are mutual friends, we were hanging in the same circles, etc. And, then we hooked up, that was about 4 months ago. It was the best relationship I ever had, she was my first love, and although I wasn't her first love, she had feelings for me like she had for none other,, we loved each other so much. The love was mutual, I believe there is no doubt about that. And that paradise lasted for about 2 months. Then, **** beggins to happen. I get sick, I developed mononucleosis, and couldn't get out of the house for weeks. I was frustrated. I was mad at the whole world for this happening to me ( btw, I workout regularly, and when I couldn't do that, I was full of negative energy ). And, I was doing the worst thing possible - I was taking it out on her. I would get mad at her for the smallest things ( for example, if she said she would come at my place at 12h, and she came at 12:30, I would get angry ). The fights were happening regularly, at least every second day. And, that "dark phase" lasted for about 3-4 weeks ( actually, while I was sick ). Then, I got better, healthwise. And I thought everything would get back to as it was, as it shoud be. 2 days after my recovery, were the best 2 days than we had for weeks, or at least I thought so. On the third day, she broke up with me. She said she was under constant pressure that I would get angry again. Apart from the obvious devastation, I was astounded. Nothing, and I mean nothing was suggesting that the break-up was coming. I was a jerk, and I am aware of that, and I would have understood if she had broken-up with me while I was acting like a jerk, but why now? Why now when everything was getting back in it's place? To make things more confusing, 3 days before the break-up, she suggested our going to London on a vacation, just the two of us. What is up with that? Her feeling towards me we real, I know, for example, after some of the nastiest fights, we would reconciliate, she would hug me and say that she loved me very much, implying that she wouldn't put up with such crap if it was anybody else. And then BAM, right after things start improving, break-up. Anyway, she broke up 1 day before going on a couple of concerts with all of our friends ( I couldn't go because of my illness ). The concerts lasted for 5 days, and were happening in other city. Those 5 days we were at NC. On the fifth day, when she returned, we talked, and I apologized sincerely for everything, for my behaviour, for not treating her appropriately, etc. She told me she got back together with her ex a day after our break up. with whom she has history ( they broke up 6 times till now, and this is the 7th time they got together again ), and would like us to be friends like before. I was devastated. It struck me like nothing has ever before. Like I said, it's been two weeks since then. I'm slowly recovering, but it still hurts like hell. NC is not an option, because all of are friends are mutual, and the fact is I am going to see her often ( with her new/old boyfriend ). And the worst part is, I don't know the whole story. I don't understand why break up with me after we have passed so much **** ( the timing of the break up is confusing ). Also, her feelings for me being so strong and sincere, how could she want to be in a new relationship just 1 day after the break up, and she seems really happy, I've seen them. And ultimately, how can I get her back? I understand she is with him right now, but it broke 6 times before, it is bound to break again, right? Now, we are on a semi-friendly/polite basis, we talk, we spend time together ( with other friends, not alone of course ), it is a bit cold but we are at least talking. Also, in october, we are going to college ( the same college ), and her boyfriend is going back to Austria ( he lives there, he comes here just during holidays ). I know I screwed up, I shouldn't have acted the way I did, but getting together with someone a day after the break up of the best relationship in your life ( her words ), I was dumbfounded. So yeah, that's my story. I know it's long, probably bored you, but if there is anything I can do, please tell me. Is it possible that feelings of remarkable strength simply fade in such short time, does she still have feelings for me and is hiding them, or are they truly gone? I simply can't believe that they can fade just like that... And advice/opinion would be helpful, thanks Edited August 29, 2012 by Dante1507
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